When a partner cheats, a child is rebellious, and a mid-life crisis comes, how should you deal with it?
What if one party in a marriage suspects the other party is cheating? Many people's first reaction is often to secretly flip through the other party's mobile phone.
Almost everyone hides some secrets in their mobile phones, isn't that the case in the hit movie "Crazy Calls" some time ago?
Faxiao and their spouses had a party of seven people, and someone proposed to play a game: everyone put their mobile phones on the table, and the phone calls, text messages, and emails received that night must be shared in public, there are no secrets.
The film is a remake of the Italian film The Perfect Stranger. "Perfect Stranger" became a hit as soon as it was released, and was subsequently remade by France, Spain, South Korea, Mexico, the United States, Russia, and China. Why is it so hot?
Because it reflects our current real life: everyone has secrets, and the mobile phone is like a black box of life, containing everyone's secrets. This is complex human nature, and human nature cannot withstand temptation.
Today, I would like to discuss with you the Italian version of "Perfect Stranger". What should we do when the midlife crisis comes?
In Perfect Stranger, the night of the party is eclipse night. A lunar eclipse is actually a metaphor, and in ancient European legends a lunar eclipse represented chaos and danger. This chaotic and dangerous metaphor is the midlife crisis. Every couple faces a "midlife crisis." Or cheating, or having an affair with netizens in the virtual world, or having an unacceptable sexual orientation.
The host of the night, Rocco and Eva's crisis came from two aspects. First, the husband and wife had been married for many years and no longer had passion, and Eva had cheated. Second, the adolescent daughter Sophia is very rebellious.
In fact, Eva's situation is very typical in real life, and it can even be said that there are a lot of such examples in our lives.
So if a woman encounters a midlife crisis like Eva, how should she deal with it?
Let's first take a look at what Eva's family is like, a typical middle-aged home. Eva, a psychiatrist, also has a successful career. Her husband, Rocco, is a plastic surgeon. Rocco has a mental problem and is currently receiving treatment secretly, and Eva does not know it yet; her daughter Sofia is 17 years old and is in a relationship with a boy whom the husband and wife dislike. Eva tries to stop it.
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A marriage of feathers
In the film, the roles of Rocco and Eva as a couple are very interesting. Although the wife is a psychiatrist, the husband can only turn to other psychiatrists when he has psychological problems. I can't ask my husband to do the surgery for me.
In addition to the husband has hidden feelings, the wife also has hidden feelings. Eva cheated on her husband's small hair, and taxi driver Quasimo. It was precisely because Quasimo liked women with big breasts that Eva planned to have breast augmentation surgery.
And what kind of person is Quasimo? Quasimo and his wife Bianca are newly married. You are strong and I am strong. Wherever the two of them go, they sprinkle dog food wherever they go. The appearance is indeed very enviable.
But in fact, Quasimo showed his love to his wife, while he was secretly crossing the Chencang with Eva, and frowning under the eyelids of Bianca and Rocco. Not only that, but Quasimo cheated on the dispatcher in the company and made the dispatcher pregnant. Complete scumbag!
In fact, in the film, the hidden relationship between Eva and Quasimo is exposed through several subtle details. Whenever the topic of Quasimo and Bianca is mentioned, the camera will always give Eva a close-up , let's discover some of Eva's unusually subtle expressions. When everyone found out that Quasimo was cheating on the dispatcher, there was a flash of shock on Eva's face; then when Bianca hid in the bathroom and cried bitterly, Eva dragged Quasimo into another room and slapped the card Seamus slapped, then took off the earring and gave it back to Quasimo.
And did Rocco know? From the details, Rocco was aware of it, but he remained silent and silently observed his wife. His wife's earrings were missing, and his expression was a bit unnatural, and he saw it all.
adolescent rebellious daughter
Sophia begins to fall in love with a boy. Sophia dressed up sexy that night and wanted to date her boyfriend, but she lied to Eva that she was hanging out with a female classmate. Eva finds condoms in Sofia's bag and denounces Sofia loudly.
Eva objected to her daughter falling in love too early, for fear that she would be hurt, but her daughter just went against her.
But Rocco had a good relationship with his daughter. When Sofia went out, Rocco thoughtfully gave her daughter some money and a box of condoms.
Many people here may be surprised. Is Rocco trying to encourage his daughter to learn badly? Obviously Rocco doesn't like that boy either.
However, Rocco believes that it is useless to stop. It is better to let go. The daughter is an adult, and she should go her own way. It is not good for her parents to control her too strictly. Rocco's remarks made Eva very angry. Eva insisted that her daughter was too young, and as a mother, she had to protect her.
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How should the midlife crisis be resolved?
As a psychiatrist, Eva helps others solve their problems every day, but can't solve her own.
In real life, situations like Eva are very common. When people reach middle age, their marriage life is as plain as water, and their children are no longer as obedient as they were when they were young.
What's interesting in the movie is that it's Eva who proposes to play the mobile version of "Truth or Dare." Eva has a secret in her heart, why do you still play this game?
Thinking about it, it is very important that the person who cheated on her is right in front of her eyes, and it is impossible for them to call at this time, so Eva is sure that their affair cannot be exposed, so she dares to do it.
At the same time, Eva wants to know whether Rocco has cheated. She is looking for a breakthrough in this marriage. While feeling guilty, she hopes to find some "evidence" of Rocco, so as to obtain psychological balance or even divorce. chips.
In terms of parent-child relationship, Eva's handling method is also simple and rude. Eva didn't switch roles well. She didn't respect Sophia, and went through her daughter's bag without permission, arbitrarily thinking that she was protecting her daughter, and did everything possible to prevent her from falling in love. She didn't realize that her daughter had grown up and was an independent person.
When a middle-aged marriage and family encounter such a crisis, how should it be resolved?
Rocco's approach in the film is worth learning from. Rocco knew he had a psychological problem, so he actively sought the help of a psychiatrist. For the marriage relationship, Rocco has been trying to ease the relationship. He believes that couples who can have a long-term relationship always know how to make appropriate concessions.
In fact, Rocco has always been against playing this game. He believes that human nature is very fragile and cannot withstand temptation at all. Whether it is love or friendship, it is better not to know some things.
In terms of how to get along with his daughter, Rocco also made a good example for the majority of parents. Sofia called Rocco to tell Rocco that her boyfriend's parents were away and that he wanted to take her home for the night. She couldn't make up her mind, so she turned to her father for help.
Rocco told Sofia on the phone: If you are sure that whenever you think about it in the future, it will feel good, then you go, if you are not sure, then don't go, because you still have a lot of time.
Rocco is indeed very rational and very intelligent. He took the approach of dredging, not blocking, his daughter's problems. Eva blindly blocked her daughter, but pushed her further away. Rocco respected her daughter, regarded her as an adult, and gave her her own space. Rocco took the initiative to give his daughter a condom outside the house. The purpose was not to encourage her daughter, but to have considered the possibility of a worse situation, and everything was within his control.
In fact, no one is perfect, no matter love, family, or friendship, you should keep a certain distance. Everyone is an independent individual. If you can learn to take a step back, all kinds of relationships will be more harmonious.
The Chinese translation of the movie: Perfect Stranger, presumably means that even the closest people around you should keep a little space for each other, just like people born in the sun, so as to make the relationship more perfect.
The ending of the film is also relatively happy. Although each couple faces various problems, they can understand each other in the end. . The game session is actually just an imaginary, everyone is fortunate that their secrets are still quietly hiding in their mobile phones.
At the end of the film, there is a full moon in the night sky, and the moon is bright and the stars are sparse.
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