Life is a confusing kaleidoscope, it seems that the more ignorant the age is, the more so. The future is always a dream word, it means that there is no impossibility. The past is what makes us who we are; the future is the reason to continue to fill life with curiosity and enthusiasm. Forrest Gump's mother said, "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get." It's more than that. The box of chocolates of life comes in an infinite number of flavors and an infinite number of shapes, luckily you have the right to pick one, unfortunately you can only pick one. In a way, it is not so much happiness to have freedom of choice as to be happy before freedom of choice. Because choosing also means rejecting all the losers. Like a highway, you can't expect it to go both home and far away. Life is such a kaleidoscope: when it turns, it is all-encompassing and omnipotent, and when you finally stop to take a peek, you realize that it has always had only one pattern.
1900 expresses repressed revolt with wanton solos in first class; his fingers are waiting to fly freely among the immigrants in lower class; but only when he is alone in a room in the bilge, looking out to the sea out of the porthole. True inner peace. Genius is a sentence, and its punishment is loneliness. Solitude is the price that genius must pay, but it is also the sugar coating that prevents genius from being dissolved. It's a chronic disease that can be alleviated but not cured, so it's hard to tell if it's a gift or a curse. Geniuses search for soulmates, but all they can find are jealous hostility and surrounding audiences; geniuses seek understanding, but get only boos and applause. I don't want to explain, because I'm too proud; I don't want to compromise, so I have to be alone.
That's what I saw in the 1900's saga, about the fear and loneliness of a genius.
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