"Usually the end of things is death, but first of all there will be life, hidden in this and that, I can't say enough, in fact, it has already settled in the noise. Silence is emotion, love is also fear, beautiful light and wildness And impermanence, those hard, miserable and painful human nature. They are all buried under the embarrassment of being born as a human being. I can't say enough. In fact, it's just flashy clouds and smoke. I don't care about flashes. Yes, just a trick." This is the end of the film and the opening of the new book by the protagonist Jep.
Because of a novel, Jep, who became famous at a young age, fell into a whirlpool of elegance and luxury without realizing it. But since then, he has been confronted with a question from his admirers, a friend who lives in a student dormitory and still wants to write, his nanny, Ramona, a stripper, a 104-year-old nun... "Why don't you write anymore? book."
Seeing too much and living too awake, he seemed to see through life. Don't want to spend time doing things you don't want to do, so leave your admirer's bed without saying goodbye. The rhetoric dispels the fake coat of friends who have been friends for many years, and the sharp words are all signs of fragility and a kind of lack. This kind of dismantling of friends is not a kind of self-analysis.
His best friend's neurotic son, Andrea, questioned him twice about death, once in a restaurant with Ramona, quoting Turgenev: "Death is watching you, watching you." He joked: "Don't take those writers seriously." "Then what should I take seriously?"
The second time was at Andrea's funeral, when Jep lost his voice in pain when the coffin was placed on his shoulders, he forgot his usual manner: "Never cry at a funeral, don't overshadow the grief of your loved ones, that way. No." Andrea asked again with her own death: "Death is on your shoulders, what should you take?"
Death seems far away, so live like a cold-eyed bystander. He didn't know at the time that Ramona was stripping to make money to treat herself. So Ramona's death, an exhibit where she takes a picture of herself every day, the reason why the 104-year-old nun only eats rhizomes is telling him what to take seriously.
I love his advice to a friend who lives in a dorm: you want to use other people's ideas to make yourself better, feel your own is not as good as others, you are wrong, try to write something about yourself, like a feeling or sadness.
That's why his friend wrote: "I spent the whole summer preparing for September, with no further plans. Now my summers are spent reminiscing about the goodwill that has faded, partly because of tiredness, Partly because of carelessness, there's nothing wrong with nostalgia. It's the only pastime for someone who has no faith in the future. There's no rain, August is over, September hasn't started, and I'm so ordinary, but there's no need to worry , it's alright, it'll be fine."
Life is a verb, go live, don't stop just because you have met something good.
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