There is a saying in the Buddhist scriptures that the endless world is the highest point of hell, and the fleshly body suffers uninterrupted suffering, so it has this name.
In the midst of infinity, longevity is the ultimate punishment.
People who carry ulterior secrets on their bodies are always worried that someone will see them, and they are always worried that someone will expose them. Both Liu Jianming and Chen Yongren knew that as long as they made a slight mistake, the next thing would be hell, but that's how they walked in the real hell and suffered endless suffering. Destiny can't get rid of it, death is the end.
Therefore, when Liu Jianming thought that Chen Yongren was just a bad student who was expelled from the police academy, he wanted to be him; eleven years later, when the two fought wits and courage, and finally Chen Boren died, he still wanted to be him.
In fact, I always wanted to be a good person. I don't know why I worked under Brother Chen in the first place. Maybe it was just to be young and energetic, but unfortunately, I walked away and I can't look back. No matter how capable and decent you are in the eyes of others, the shadow in your heart will linger for the rest of your life. Later, you don’t remember what you are doing, and you can only struggle to survive in the middle of nowhere. , at all costs. Kill those who should be killed, and kill those who shouldn't. When I finally killed Brother Chen with my own hands, I was so happy, I even jumped excitedly, I thought this was the edge of the sea of suffering, I didn't want to take the next step, but there was still Chen Yongren; I didn't want to be there I killed him, but he was unwilling to forgive me. Originally, I thought that if I killed him again, no one would ever know the existence of the other me, but what happened after I killed him? After many days, when no one threatens me anymore, I still want to be him. I still have nightmares, I really don't know if there will be another Chen Yongren. Perhaps, it was because he was righteous in the first place that he was able to get rid of it earlier. And I am still in hell.
In fact, from the time I started working as an undercover agent, I could no longer tell whether I was a good person or a bad person. Sometimes I hoped that I was a complete bad guy. It was really hard to pretend to be a bad guy, so that I didn’t have to worry about other things, like Ah Qiang did. , how nice. After so many years in the dark, I don't remember if there was any other choice at the time. I was just repeating my life in a boring and dangerous way. I could only smile to cover up my inner panic after everyone else. Perhaps, what I have been looking forward to is the appearance of someone like Liu Jianming, no matter what the result is, I just want to end it all. When Officer Ye died, I stood in the small alley behind the crowd and gave a salute that I hadn't done for a long time. For so many years, I had no idea whether I still had the ability or not; when Sir Huang died, I slowly In front of him, he was so stupid that he was not even afraid of exposing himself. It was Ah Qiang who saved him. Ah Qiang told me a lot when he was about to die, and I was confused as to who he was. In the end, I just want to live a peaceful life, but I have to tell myself that I am a policeman, I have to avenge Huang Sir, and I have to bring down this inner ghost. When I finally pointed the gun at him, for a moment, I thought I was victorious, but God knew that I couldn't get rid of it forever. When I fell, there was really no resentment, just the word, fate. Eleven years ago, how could I have imagined that it would end like this, three years, three years, three years, before the fourth three years came, I finally completed my mission in this way, but, I am no longer The once hot-blooded police academy cadet was never even a policeman.
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