Humans are social animals, and society is made up of family cells, so people cannot exist independently of their families. Even an elite in the workplace like Andy in "Ode to Joy", a powerful woman who can handle food, clothing, housing, and transportation, wants to get married and start a family, not to mention ordinary people.
The truth is true, but the protagonist in the film "The Mule" is an alternative.
The hero of the film is an eighty-year-old man named Earl. It is said that he is different because he has a wife and children, but he has not interacted with them for many years. He does not live at home and runs a farm by himself. He likes to grow flowers and devotes all his time to the business of running a farm. For decades, he did not keep in touch with his family, not even attending his daughter's wedding.
At the same time, he is keen to participate in various gatherings, especially the club activities of old comrades in arms, where he gave everyone flowers and seedlings for free, paid for everyone's drinks, and also won awards at the Daylily Conference.
Why is he unwilling to spend a little time with his family when he is beautiful outside?
Earl told the truth on his wife's deathbed: Instead of being a failure at home, it was better to be a success outside.
This sentence expresses the aspirations of too many people, and how many people regard this sentence as the creed of life, and work hard for it, unscrupulously, just for the so-called "success".
What is success? Is it fame or money, is it power or beauty?
In Earl's mind, success is fame and money.
For the money, he is willing to act as a "mule" for the drug trafficking organization, driving a truck to deliver goods for criminals. Once he got the money, he sponsored the veterans club, enjoyed everyone's praise, paid for his granddaughter's wedding, blocked his wife's mockery of him, and bought himself an expensive new car... Perhaps, there are many more , which is not shown more in the film. It can be seen that what Earl pursues is the superficial prosperity and the self in the eyes of others.
A child once asked me, getting married is too troublesome, can I not get married and live alone for a lifetime?
I'm not a life coach, so my views are not necessarily correct. There is no absolute right or wrong on this topic.
Humans are social animals, so they are naturally afraid of being alone. If you want to live alone for the rest of your life, and don’t build close relationships with others, unless you have a strong energy inside, which is enough to support you to fight the fear and anxiety caused by loneliness.
All human actions come from relationships, relationships are everything, and everything is for relationships.
We earn money to support our family from the parent-child relationship and the relationship between husband and wife. We realize our dreams from the relationship between ourselves and ourselves. We advocate environmental protection from the relationship between human beings and nature. We regulate work and rest from the relationship between the brain and various organs. ......
However, most of the energy that humans use to maintain all external relationships comes from the parent-child relationship and husband-wife relationship generated by the family. Family love is the source of nourishing our inner energy. This is one of the reasons why humans get married and have children.
Modern society is highly developed, no longer need hunting and gathering, and no longer need to do heavy physical work. It seems that the necessity of marriage is not so high. However, the nourishing effect of family on people is eternal, and people need this kind of energy. Instilled, but also longing for warmth and happiness.
Although Earl is a bohemian old man, but in the end he is willing to return to the family, he accompanies his wife on the last journey of his life, and reconciles with his daughter who has not spoken for twelve years.
Liberalism has never been against the family. It's just that we have not dealt with the relationship between the two. We insist that if we want to be free, we must break free from the shackles of the family.
In fact, freedom based on responsibility is the most secure freedom. Avoiding responsibility for our own freedom will only lead us into a dark abyss where we cannot extricate ourselves.
One more meaning. Friends who have watched the movie "The Pianist at Sea" may say that the pianist at sea has never left the big ship in his life, has no wife, and has no relatives. Isn't it good that he regards the ship as his home?
In my opinion, first, pianists have what they love in their hearts, which is music, and also have their own beliefs, that is, the life of a worldly person. A man of pursuit and faith is indestructible. But most of us don't get there. Second, on the other hand, who can say that the persistence of the pianist at sea is not an escape? Avoid building relationships, escape all the uncertainty of life, and just live in your own world.
Relationship is a big test room, which is actually really interesting.
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