what are you going to do next?
- Get up every morning and breathe all day. After a while, I no longer need to remind myself to get up and breathe. After a while, I no longer often think of the sweet past.
——"Sleepless in Seattle"
Sometimes, I tell myself over and over again that it's not important, it's not important, and later, I really don't care anymore.
Sometimes, I tell myself over and over again, forget these, forget these, and then, I can't tell when I really can't remember.
But when I think about it, it's really sad, I can't even understand that feeling, I can't understand that these things were so important. Terrible psychological cues.
Those secrets are fermented in the memory, like the alienation of the world, as if the balloons were inadvertently released. Those careful avoidance and expectations have become comical and absurd, those once heartbreaking have become understatement, and those once unwilling to be mentioned have become common jokes. The days left behind seem to have evaporated the color, bleak and desolate. No matter how profound the attachment will be washed away by time?
I really think about some things about you, but I really can't think of anything.
Sanmao comforts readers who have passed away, saying, don't be sad, they live in our memory, we don't die, they are still there. But I wonder how Sanmao will comfort me? They are still there, but we are separated by time or space, and maybe there is no intersection, they are also living in my memory. Even if we meet again in twenty years, all I know is the one with her braided horns, the one who regards himself as an Ultraman. However, I am forgetting, I murdered her or him in my world. Memories are always heavy, but in many cases, it is not the memory itself that is heavy, but is heavy because of guilt - we will never forgive ourselves for forgetting. "Laughing and Forgetting": People know that it is impossible for him to embrace the universe, the sun, the moon, and the stars, and it makes him unacceptable to miss another infinity, the infinity that is close at hand. Milan Kundera's almost divine interpretation makes people tremble.
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