was ten minutes into the movie, I was sure I had seen it. It must have been in the distant college days when I paused to think about the plot, and all I could think of was Meg Ryan's bizarre climax in a restaurant.
Watching this film this time, I saw something other than love.
Young harry is like an arrow, sharp and full of wings. He admits that he has read a lot of books and understands a lot of philosophy. His hope for life is as thick as the curly hair on his head. Standing on the commanding heights of the wave, he has a sense of security in the grasp of the world, and arrogantly cuts many gray areas into black and white.
The young sally was also young and energetic, she was not pretty enough back then, and she was a little flattered and dismissive when Harry condescended to judge "you are quite attractive".
Of course they couldn't get together, Harry didn't like Sally who was "not pretty and very geek", and Sally didn't like Harry's self-righteous arrogance.
In fact, we were all like this when we were young. We wanted to find the right person. Once we had a mold in our hearts, we were even more tolerant and sincere to those we met later. Euphemistically called unwilling to accommodate.
Later, the two people who were proud of them met again, as if it was a confirmation of the hasty conclusion many years ago, "Look, he is still so annoying." Sally thought. And the married harry has no time to evaluate Sally at all, he is immersed in the happiness of the upcoming wedding. Then one of them broke up unexpectedly and the other got divorced.
When they meet again, they still have disputes, but there is more sincerity and tolerance of "I am willing to get to know you".
The years have worn away the hostility, and it has also worn away Harry's hairline. Harry took the trouble to tell his nostalgia for Helen, and maybe he was unwilling, because Helen told him "I don't even know if I loved you", and then ran off with other men. For a man - especially a proud man - it should be a fatal blow.
And Sally's attitude towards breaking up is strangely calm. "He didn't want to get married, and I wanted to get married. So we broke up." Harry couldn't accept such a rational attitude:
"I've never seen you sad about leaving joe."
"Nonsense."
"Then why don't you sleep with someone else?"
"You sleep with all the women in New York, so have you forgotten about Helen?"
… ...
I love the part where they're watching the same show in their respective homes and talking on the phone. Nothing to do with romance, just a warm companionship. In the first days when harry couldn't adjust to helen's departure, he needed time to rebuild his life, and he needed someone to tell him that he would not be alone in the whole world and only himself.
"Look, I lived alone too. You can too."
The next thing was the mutual understanding of the two people, each bringing their partners to the party, but criticizing each other's partners.
"I think she's too young to understand harry."
"I don't think he deserves Sally."
Like Ross and Rachel from Friends? Good friends become lovers. This should be the supreme golden rule in Hollywood's values of marriage and love. Just sharing at the beginning, and slowly start thinking about the other party. You can understand what allusions he talks about, and she will ask your opinion for every step of her choice. Then you become a witness, an inseparable part of each other's lives. And when people wonder why you're not together, they don't seem to be able to give other footnotes other than a laugh. It seems that it is just a little bit short, and it may need a change, a stimulus, and a decisive initiative.
Then joe is getting married. Sally cried in a mess, "I always thought he didn't want to get married, but now I found out that he just doesn't want to marry me."
This kind of total denial of the past is simply a killer skill. Brutal and realistic.
In "500 days with summer", Jon Joseph asks the summer who wants to get married, why? You said that you didn't want to be tied down by feelings, you said you didn't want to get married, why did you make an exception for others?
Summer said, because I just felt that.
what? 囧 Joseph gets to the bottom of it.
That I was never sure when I was with you.
It's just, it's too shocking.
Yes, isn't it? We have to accept this setting - there are always one or two people in this world who you think are the one, who cannot empathize with your liking and reciprocate. And there is no need to be too depressed, because as long as you let go and look for it, you will always find happiness. Happiness is not love, it's like putting your feet in the most comfortable shoes and walking on the road to the future easily.
At the end of the film, harry said, it took us three months to start a new chapter in our life together. Sally corrected, it was 12 years and three months. Yes, these 12 years are essential, without experience, where can the change of mood come from? Not to mention tolerance and sincerity.
Therefore, if setbacks are necessary, if ups and downs are unavoidable, and if it is really too late to usher in fate, can you prepare for tolerance earlier, be more sincere to people, and try to be considerate and caring, so that the Will one come earlier?
Then we may find that the saying "if I don't like you, I won't like you because you like me" may be wrong.
The screenwriter of When harry met sally said that they did not intend to get married, perhaps a lifetime of good friends is more realistic. Later, they found out that they were together, and it was unexpectedly good.
Can good friends be together? This topic has also been published recently in China, "The Strategy of the Ex". The current girlfriend of Gao Fushuai can deal with all his exes, but he can't deal with his "good friends". That movie really impressed me, because until the last ten minutes, I bet that "good friends" would succeed, and I turned out to be wrong.
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