When I was browsing Zhihu, I saw a discussion about "how much do you love your child", and then I saw this comment in the message: (12 likes)
To be honest, this message did not give me too many feelings of "father and mother's love", but gave me an inexplicable sense of horror. If she wanted to express that she could give everything for her child, even her life, This kind of example is a bit nondescript, because this kind of behavior is not a kind of "giving", but more like a mental breakdown, and its back is more likely to be a projection of control and possessiveness.
If what she wants to express is that the child is the only spiritual support and sustenance in her life, then this behavior seems logical, because the departure of the child will directly lead to the disintegration of her spiritual world. But I can't help but ask, why are Chinese parents so accustomed to placing their spirits on their children? Besides children, do parents have other spiritual sustenance?
This example may be a bit extreme, because most children do not have life accidents, and parents do not need to experience this kind of separation, but behind this kind of thinking is a microcosm of a society that lacks spiritual pursuits.
Can't accept the child's departure, not even leaving.
There was a time when my mother went to Guangzhou to visit me. When I came home from get off work that day, I found no one at home. I guessed that my mother should go downstairs and dance square dance with the aunts. I turned on the living room light and fiddled for a while to get back to work. Suddenly my mom came out of the dark room (kind of like a horror movie?) and I asked her why she didn't turn on the lights since she was at home. She joked that she wanted to see if I had been looking around for where my mother was when I came back. In the eyes of the mother, she still believes that she is "needed" by the child. I'm a bit dumbfounded, in fact I'm used to living independently.
Of course, my mother's "diseases" are relatively few. I still have fresh memories of Zhu Yuchen's mother. When Zhu's mother expressed her views on marriage and her attitude towards her son on the program "My Boy", it caused great controversy. .
Mama Zhu believes that the benchmark for a "good wife and good mother" is herself. At home, Mama Zhu can support two Filipino maids and insist on getting up at 4 o'clock every day to make Sydney juice for her son. She said: "I have no self, I use my whole life to do it. Treat my son", this sentence is actually tragic, but it is proud of Zhu's mother.
Zhu's mother believes that a good wife and a good mother should be like this. The division of labor between men and women is different. Since you are married, you should take up this responsibility. This remark caused great controversy and became a hot spot for a while.
Zhu's mother insisted on taking care of her son for ten years. Is it a mother's love? I think so. But as I said before, in human behavior, the vast majority of "love" is not selfless, and some even hide possessiveness and control. This psychological characteristic can be seen in Zhu's mother.
For example, Zhu Yuchen said in an interview that he seldom drinks mineral water, and all of it is occupied by the "juice" boiled by his mother. This is the juice that Zhu's mother wakes up at 4 o'clock and boils, and his son must drink it. Similarly, Zhu's mother will bluntly say that she doesn't like Zhu Yuchen's girlfriend who dresses too "exposedly", and frankly will interfere with every part of her son's emotional life. Zhu Yuchen's refusal will be considered a "rebellious heart", which is precisely the manifestation of the desire to control , was unknowingly wrapped up by "mother's love".
I won’t go into details. My point is that perhaps the new generation should ask themselves , can we find another spiritual sustenance besides children in the future?
In fact, the older generation does not have much spiritual pursuits that are closely related to the background of the times. Since the industrial revolution liberated the labor force, people have freed their hands and have more time to find the meaning of life, but except for a very small number of wise people, The thinking of ordinary people is lagging behind. To change the thinking habits of an era, it often takes several generations of transformation, including giving more inspiration to future generations and showing them more choices and possibilities in the way of life. So that's where good books and good movies come in.
The Toy Story quartet: A textbook for great parents.
If you haven't watched the first three parts of "Toy Story", I can help you with the plot, but it is worth mentioning that the European and American animation branches have long been oriented towards adults, which means that it is not just for children. It is also for adults to watch. The older generation has a prejudice against animation and thinks that it is a childish thing for children to watch. Of course, it is not their fault. Chinese animation is developing too slowly. In fact, in the 1960s and 1970s, there was no shortage of classic imported animations, such as "The Mole's Tale" in 1956, "Astro Boy" in 1963, and "Smart Break" in 1975, but most Chinese people in that era could not really be on TV. When I saw these works on the plane, it was past my childhood.
Children in the 1980s and 1990s were the coolest. Those children lived in an era when imported animations were not yet blocked. Shanghai art, Japanese animation, and European and American animations were mixed, and their tastes were cunning and poisonous. Childhood classics such as "Long" and "Gourd Baby" were never considered top-notch when compared in that era. Not to mention the works such as "Blue Mouse Big Face Cat" that are already at the bottom of the discrimination chain. "Blue Cat 3000 Questions", which is now regarded as a classic by young people, is actually a masterpiece of the decline in the quality of domestic animation in the millennium. Inferior products such as "Bear Infested", in comparison, "Blue Cat" has become a classic.
After blocking many excellent imported animations that year, the media began to publicize the dangers of Japanese comics and American comics, hoping to bring revitalization to domestic animation. But sooner or later, there will be a day when this group of young children will also come into contact with masterpieces from the other side of the ocean on the Internet, and begin to realize that the booming domestic animation in the media is just a fantasy.
In 1995, the first "Toy Story" was born: - Friendship
Let’s briefly take a look at the first three plots. In the first one, Buzz Lightyear is the new toy of the little boy Andy. Unexpectedly, both fell into the hands of the neighbors. Woody began to realize his mistake and rescued Buzz Lightyear from the bear children. They reconciled and became good friends. The film tells children not jealous of people who are better than themselves, but to build friendships with them.
1999, "Toy Story 2" - company
Woody was put on the shelf by the little owner Andy because of the broken arm, but let a toy dealer discover its collection value and stole it. They will be collected as a set and sold to a Japanese museum for display. At first, Woody did not want to be sold to Japan. , but the old miner said that Andy will grow up and enter the university, and toys will always be discarded one day. It is better to become a cherished exhibition. In the end, he was persuaded by Buzz Lightyear: Andy will leave us when he grows up, but don't miss every moment that accompanies him growing up.
2010, "Toy Story 3" - Heritage
Andy is 17 years old. When he is at the age of college, the toys of childhood have long been sealed in the box. After a kindergarten storm, the toys returned to Andy's house. Andy gave the toys that had accompanied him for many years for the first time. The little girl Bonnie, with a lot of reluctance in her eyes, Andy said to Bonnie: " Woody has been with me since I can remember, he is a smart, kind, brave cowboy, he is to me. Special, can you help me take good care of it? " Bonnie nodded. A lot of people say this is probably the best ending to the Toys series, the moment we hand the toy to Bonnie and the time we say goodbye to childhood. But unexpectedly, Pixar once again shot "Toys" to a new height in the fourth film, opening a new chapter.
2019, Toy Story 4 - Indie
The characters in "Toys 4", on the surface, are children's toys, but in fact, they have long since become a reflection of the parenthood of the new generation. After all, the first children to watch this animation are also getting ready to meet new roles in their lives. Woody is like the father of the children. He builds friendships with the children and accompanies them to grow up. Even after meeting Bonnie, he resumes his "old business" of being an old father. He worries that Bonnie will not adapt to school life. Bonnie couldn't make new friends, so she secretly jumped into Bonnie's little schoolbag and followed, like parents who sent their children to kindergarten on the first day.
With the help of Woody, Bonnie made a simple little toy - "Chacha" with the discarded materials of the trash can. Because the school prohibits bringing your own toys, Chacha became Bonnie's first new school friend. It can also be said that the fork has become Bonnie's favorite toy, and has given emotional sustenance.
However, the material of Chacha itself comes from the trash can. Even after being given "life", he still thinks he is a pile of garbage (excluding derogatory meaning), so there is a scene that makes people laugh at the film: Chacha can't help but go to the trash can. Drilling inside, as long as it sees the trash can, its instinct will prompt it to run towards the trash can.
"Old Father" Woody, pulling Fork out of the trash can again and again and bringing it back to Bonnie, the process can be tortuous. Until Cha Cha was kidnapped by the "villain" doll Gaby in the play.
Gaby's purpose is very simple, she needs Woody to exchange his "heart" (that is, the wire-controlled music box in Woody's body). To this end, Woody found an old friend shepherdess to come to help together.
The shepherdess is a very special and lovable character. She was Woody's girlfriend in the first "Toys" and was later lost because of the owner's move. In "Toys 4", she was injected with new symbolism. It can also be said that the Shepherdess is an important role in the opening of a new chapter in "Toys 4". Before rescuing Cha Cha, Woody and her had an exchange of ideas.
The shepherdess saw Woody's obsession and persuaded Woody not to take risks. The shepherdess felt that children needed toys, but toys are not always necessary, and they are not as irreplaceable as air. Bonnie will always leave old toys. One day, she will soon find a new toy to accompany her. However, Woody emphasizes the loyalty and responsibility of the toy. He believes that the Shepherdess is just an abandoned toy and will not understand his mood. He asked her, "Don't you ever think about going back to the owner?" The shepherdess shrugged and took Woody to see the most spectacular view of the playground, showing Woody the colorful world in front of him.
The shepherdess believes that having an owner is not the ultimate destination for every toy, as if having children should not be the only way in life , she walks her own way with another pile of small toys to show Woody Another possibility of toy life. Shepherdess's thoughts are advanced and in line with the trend of the times. She was selected as a representative figure of the awakening of individual consciousness, and she is destined to bear some infamy under the alternation and conflict of the times.
But I like the significance of the times conveyed by the shepherdess. Chinese people may have long been used to having children step by step, working hard for their children all their lives, from sorting their children's diapers to joining the parent-teacher association, to worrying about the school district housing. And worrying about the succession of the children's lineage, it seems like this is the end of his life. Perhaps this is the meaning of life for most people, but it should never be a life template for everyone.
Shepherdess doesn't hate children. She chooses to follow Woody to save Chacha, and hopes that Chacha can return to Bonnie's side. When Woody wants to take a further risk, the Shepherdess said, you must sacrifice yourself to save Chacha. Is the fork strap back to Bonnie?
Woody said: "Yeah, because Bonnie needs a fork"
The shepherdess said, "No, it's you who needs Bonnie."
Similarly, does Zhu Yuchen really need Sydney juice at 4 am every day? He said that he also wanted to drink ordinary mineral water once, right? Woody is like Zhu's mother. His obsession comes from anxiety about his own identity, and he has not formed an independent spiritual system. He places his sense of security on others, and all his life values are based on "being needed by others". On the other hand, once they are no longer needed, they will have a mental breakdown, or kidnap their relatives with a strong desire for control, or look for substitutes, continue to build a "sense of need" and form self-deception.
Woody finally rescued Chacha and brought it back to Bonnie with the help of Shepherdess and Little Toy. Pixar was cautious in dealing with the change of times, and Woody did not deviate from his beliefs. But he didn't go back. Woody figured it out, let go, and left with the shepherdess. There will always be someone who will take the first step at a difficult time.
This is the greatness of Pixar, and the film shows the power it deserves in the discussion of different life paths and how to be a good parent. Because through our actions and determinations, we express our deepest views on the benchmark of survival.
View more about Toy Story 4 reviews
