own memo

Will Traynor: I have to tell you something.

Lou Clark: I know. I know about Switzerland, I have known for months. Listen I know this is not how you would have chosen it, but I can make you happy.

Will Traynor: No.

Lou Clark: What?

Will Traynor: No Clarke. This could be a good life, but it's not my life, it's not even close. You never saw me before. I loved my life. I really loved it. I can't be the kind of man who just accepts this.

Lou Clark: You're not giving it a chance, you're not giving me a chance. I have become a whole new person these last six months because of you.

Will Traynor: I know and that's why I can't have you tied to me. I don't want you to miss all the things that someone else can give you. And selfishly I don't what you to look at me one day and feel event the tiniest bit of regret or pity.

Lou Clark: I would never think that!

Will Traynor: You don't know that. I can't watch you wandering around the annex in your crazy dresses. Or see you naked and not be able to... oh Clarke if you have any idea what I want to do to you right now. I can't live like this.

Lou Clark: Please Will! Please!

Will Traynor: Shh. Listen, this, tonight being with you is the most wonderful thing you could have ever done for me. But I need it to end here. No more pain and exhaustion and waking up every morning already wishing it was over. It's not going to get better than this. The doctors know it and I know it. When we get back, I'm going to Switzerland so I'm asking you if you feel the things you say you feel. Come with me.

Lou Clark: I thought I was changing your mind!

Will Traynor: Nothing was ever going to change my mind. I promised my parents six months and that's what I have given them.

Lou Clark: No! Don't say another word. You're so selfish. I tore my heart out in front of you and all you can say is no. And now you want me to come and watch the worst thing you could possibly imagine. Do you have any idea what you're asking? I wish I had never taken this stupid job. I wish I had never met you.

Lou Clark: You don't have to be an arse! Your friends got the shitty treatment. Fine *They* deserved it. *I'm* just trying to do my job as best I can. So it would be really nice if you didn't try and make my life as miserable as you apparently make everyone else's.

Will Traynor: And what if I said I didn't want you here?

Lou Clark: I'm not employed by you. I'm employed by your mother. So unless *she* says she doesn't want me here anymore, I'm staying. Not because I care about you, or particularly enjoy your company, but because I need the money. I *really* need the money.