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Anna: I am here to fulfill your dreams.
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John: If something is too good to be true, you can bet it's not.
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John: Oh God! Here comes the bullshit!
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[first lines]
Traffic Policeman: Sorry, I don't speak English very well. I'm from Roma. My job, as you can see, is to see that the traffic move. I stand up here, an I see everything. All people. I see life. In this city, all is a story.
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Phyllis: If you'd just relax and stop clenching your fists.
Jerry: I can't unclench when there's turbulence. You know, I am an atheist.
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Michelangelo: He sings for pleasure, not money.
Jerry: Well, there's a great deal of pleasure in money. You know, you... it's green and crinkly. You can fondle the bills.
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Jack: It's incredible that the Colosseum is still standing after thousands of years. You know, Sally and I have to re-tile the bathroom every six months.
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Monica: I call that futile feeling, Ozymandias Melancholia.
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Jack: It's sort of charming that she's a con artist.
John: Yes. She does have a certain something, which trumps logic. So go ahead, walk into the propeller.
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Jerry: Don't analyze me, Phyllis, okay? You know, many have tried and all have failed. My brain doesn't fit the usual id-ego-superego model!
Phyllis: No, you have the only brain with three ids.
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Jerry: In life I have a terrible voice, but when I'm soaping myself under hot water, I sound just like Eartha Kitt.
Hayley: You look strange.
Jerry: Phyllis, I'm having... there's a psychological term for this. I'm having a breakthrough or an epiphany. What is the term for what I'm having?
Phyllis: A death wish.
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Monica: I love entering places illegally.
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Jerry: I see New York. I see Vienna Opera House. I see Paris.
Phyllis: All in the shower?
Jerry: Yes. They love it that he sings in the shower. They identify. You know, he's going to be the most popular opera singer in the world.
Phyllis: Certainly the cleanest.
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Jack: With age comes wisdom.
John: With age comes exhaustion.
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[last lines]
Giancarlo: It's me that knows Rome the best, not a traffic policemen or anyone. I see all from here. The romance, the students, the lovers on the Spanish Steps. There are many stories, next time you come.
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Jerry: If you're channeling Freud, ask for my money back.
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Jack: Look, the time for debating has long passed. Let's go down to the car.
Monica: Oh, a car is different. You can fuck me in the car, I'm fine with that.
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John: A year with her, she would've had you free fall parachuting and adopting Burmese orphans.
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John: John: And you buy into her bullshit because she seems to know all the right things to say. She knows names, she knows buzzwords, she knows certain cultural phrases that imply that she knows more than she does.
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Jerry: Jesus. The kid's a Communist, the father's a mortician. Does the mother run a leper colony?
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Giancarlo: Someone dead?
Jerry: No, but it's early.
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Monica: Michelangelo, he's not a sufferer.
Jack: What's so great about suffering?
Monica: There's something that's attractive about a man that's sensitive to the agonies of the universe.
To Rome with Love Quotes
Extended Reading