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[to his new wife]
Dwight Hansen: You can get it doggy-style or you can get it laying on your side. Those are your only choices. This is my house and I get to say. Got it?
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Dwight Hansen: Yeah, you pull that hot shot stuff around me, and I'll break every bone in your goddamn body. You understand me? Yeah, you're in for a change, mister, a whole 'nother ball game.
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Dwight Hansen: Well... You can want in one hand and shit in the other, and see which one fills first.
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[When coming home]
Dwight Hansen: Here I am, you lucky people!
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Dwight Hansen: Liar, whore, liar, whore and you know it!
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Dwight Hansen: Shut your pie hole!
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Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: Sometimes I had to blame somebody; she was the only one there.
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Caroline Wolff Hansen: What did he do?
Principal Shippy: He violated school property and he flouted the law.
Caroline Wolff Hansen: Can you say that in English, please?
Principal Shippy: He wrote obscene words on the wall.
Caroline Wolff Hansen: Did you do it?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: [shakes his head]
Caroline Wolff Hansen: He didn't do it.
Principal Shippy: He wrote obscene words on the wall.
Caroline Wolff Hansen: What obscene words?
Principal Shippy: "Fuck You."
Caroline Wolff Hansen: That's one obscene word.
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Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: I'm not going!
Dwight Hansen: The hell you say.
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Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: I'm staying home!
Dwight Hansen: You're gonna shit and fall back in it. That's all you're gonna do. Now get out here.
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Dwight Hansen: You look fine.
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: I look like an idiot.
Dwight Hansen: You act like an idiot. You look fine.
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Dwight Hansen: This is nothing compared to what you're gonna get, dammit!
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Geiger Counter Vendor: Lady, you got more courage than you got common sense.
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Dwight Hansen: I know a thing or two about a thing or two!
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Silver Sister #1: Look, it's Elvis, Elvis and... Elvis.
Terry Taylor: Does your face hurt? 'Cause it's killin' me.
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Dwight Hansen: I don't believe that crap, you know, I believe there is such a thing as a bad boy, bad clear through. It's gonna be my job to set you straight. That's right, to kill or cure. Kill or cure!
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Dwight Hansen: You don't know it yet, but me and Concrete are in your blood. We'll make a man of you yet. In years to come you'll thank me. You'll remember me... me and Concrete!
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Dwight Hansen: [telling Toby to punch him] Now come on! Come on! Let's go, god damn it, let's start, you little fuckin' sissy, all your god damn fuckin' life, quitter, gonna be a god damned quitter, let's go, damn you! Don't go all shy and delicate on me, you're acting as sissy as little miss Arthur Gale, you know that? And you know what I'm gonna call you, I'm gonna call you little miss Jackie Wolff. Oh my yes, oh Jackie, oh my yes, little miss Jackie Wolff, little miss Jackie Wolff... Is that what you want me to call you? Is that what you want the kids in school to call you? Come on, let's go, come on, let's do it. Oh, Jesus Christ, if you're gonna act like a...
[Toby punches him]
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Caroline Wolff Hansen: [interrupting Toby and Dwight fighting] Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
Dwight Hansen: What's the matter, honey?
Caroline Wolff Hansen: I will not referee!
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Dwight Hansen: [beating Toby] Only me on this whole Earth to straighten you out, and I will do it, kill or cure. Kill or cure.
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Caroline Wolff Hansen: You're so afraid that someone's gonna get something that you never had. It's what makes you mean. And you know something, Dwight? One of these days, all of that meanness is gonna snap back and slap you right in the face.
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Dwight Hansen: Why, I'm so scared, I'm so scared, I'm so scared, wo-o-o!
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Dwight Hansen: Hey, leopard. I said hey, leopard. I know you, leopard. I can see those spots that you can't change, leopard. Huh, leopard? Huh?
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Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: Mom, you can leave too, I'm leaving, you don't have to stay here for this shit.
Caroline Wolff Hansen: I don't, do I?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: No, you don't!
Caroline Wolff Hansen: I could leave with you right now, couldn't I?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: Yes, you could.
Caroline Wolff Hansen: I could walk right out that door, couldn't I?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: Yes!
Dwight Hansen: What?
Caroline Wolff Hansen: I'm leaving you, Dwight.
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Dwight Hansen: What about me? What about me? When is it ever Dwight's turn for some consideration? What about me? I'll tell you one thing: You'll remember me!
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[first lines]
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: It was 1957. We were driving from Florida to Utah. After my mother was beaten up by her boyfriend, we got in the Nash and high-tailed it for the uranium fields. We were gonna get rich and change our luck, which hadn't been so hot since our family broke up five years back.
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[last lines]
Caroline Wolff Hansen: I love you.
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: I know that, mom. I've always known that.
Bus driver: All aboard!
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Dwight Hansen: Hey look it's the Hot Shot that thinks he knows everything. Buddy, what you don't know would fill a book. Edsel's a piece of shit car.
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Dwight Hansen: You left the cap off the toothpaste again.
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Dwight Hansen: Every time I come home, I feel the top of the TV to see if its warm, *and it always is!*
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Dwight Hansen: I trade an old piece of crap for a valuable hunting dog and all you can do is piss and moan! Make your own deals from now on!
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[Toby notices that his prep school application forms were in the garbage]
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: My application forms must've come today and he threw 'em away!
Dwight Hansen: Hey, I thought I was helping him. Thought I save him some trouble, 'cause he got no chance of gettin' into some fancy prep school.
Caroline Wolff Hansen: You always got your nose pressed up against the big shop window, haven't ya, Dwight?
Dwight Hansen: What?
Caroline Wolff Hansen: You're so afraid that someone else is gonna get something you never had. It's what make you mean. And you know something, Dwight? One of these days, all that meanness is gonna snap back and slap you right in the face!
Dwight Hansen: Oh, I'm so scared. I'm so scared! I'm SO SCARED! Oh-oh-oh! This is all you gave me for dinner?
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[Dwight steps in early from work]
Pearl: Hey, what are you doing home so - Oh, Toby got the scholarship. $2,300.
Dwight Hansen: Hey, Leopard. I say "Hey, Leopard". I know you, leopard. I can see those spots that you can't change, leopard. Huh, leopard? Huh? Thinks he can go to some fancy prep school to fool everybody? Well, not a chance. Not a chance. I know a thing or two about a thing or two. I sure do. I sure do.
[Dwight notices an empty mustard bottle]
Dwight Hansen: Who threw this away?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: I did.
Dwight Hansen: Who threw this away? You did? Why?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: 'Cause it was empty.
Dwight Hansen: [turns cross] Empty? That look empty to you?
Pearl: Looks empty to me.
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: Yeah, it looks empty to me too.
Dwight Hansen: [grabs Toby's neck] Hey, Mr. Hotshot, is it empty? Huh? Is it empty?
Pearl: Dad!
Dwight Hansen: [shoves the bottle in Toby's left eye; angry] Now, now, now, is it empty?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: Stop!
Dwight Hansen: [furious] Now. Now, Mr. Big-Time-hotshot-Prep-School fucker! Is it empty? Is it empty? Huh?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: No.
Dwight Hansen: Good! All right. Now clean it out. Clean it OUT! Now, was it empty? Huh? Was it empty?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: Yes!
[Dwight smacks Toby in the face and a brawl begins]
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Caroline Wolff Hansen: [smacks Dwight with a baseball bat] Get away from him! Get away from him or I'll kill you! What's going on here?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: I got this scholarship and he went nuts! He's crazy and I'm leaving!
Dwight Hansen: Great. Go! Finally! About time! About time! Go!
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: Oh, no, no. Don't worry. I'm gone! Just give me my paper route money.
Dwight Hansen: That money's "gone with the wind".
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: No!
Dwight Hansen: That's right, I spent it all as you made it, for things that we needed! It's gone! Poof! Poof!
Caroline Wolff Hansen: [furious] You know something, Dwight? It's not so much that you been dissapointing. It's that you've been consistantly dissapointing!
Dwight Hansen: Oh, fancy, fancy talk. Fancy talk for a whore. Fancy talk. Oh, yeah! I know a thing or two about a thing or two. I've got friends in this town and they tell me things. And I found out some guy down at that campaign headquarters, he found you a job in Washington, D.C. You're gonna run off with him aren't ya, Miss Whore? Aren't ya, Miss Whore?
Caroline Wolff Hansen: You are pathetic.
Dwight Hansen: Miss Whore. Liar! Liar, whore! Liar, whore! And you know it!
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: Mom, you can leave too. I'm leaving. You don't have to stay here for this shit!
Caroline Wolff Hansen: I don't, do I?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: No, you don't!
Dwight Hansen: You're a liar and a whore!
Caroline Wolff Hansen: I could leave with you right now, could I?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: Yes, you could.
Caroline Wolff Hansen: I could walk right out that door, could I?
Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: Yes!
Dwight Hansen: What?
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Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: Dwight said I had as much chance of passing the test as he had of farting his way through the star spangled banner.
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Dwight Hansen: A neighbor of mine says, "Looking for nice churches, come to Concrete. Looking for sin, go to hell."
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Norma: Dad thinks he's some kind of big hunter.
Pearl: Well, he killed a deer once.
Norma: That was with the car, Pearl.
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Caroline Wolff Hansen: I don't have another get-up-and-go left in me. Do you understand that?
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Arthur Gayle: I don't have a dad. I never did. I sprang full-blown from my mother's imagination.
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Caroline Wolff Hansen: You know something, Dwight, it's not so much that you've been disappointing. It's that you've been consistently disappointing.
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Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: [narrating] You can dream of a moment for years and still somehow miss it when it comes. You've got to reach through the flames and take it, or lose it forever. I took it. So did my mother. We never looked back.
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Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: It's not the shoes, is it? Or the candy, or anything else. It's me, Isn't? You just can't stand the fact that I exist.
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Tobias 'Toby' Wolff: [to a fat woman after she mocks him] Have another cookie, Marian. Keep your strength up.
This Boy's Life Quotes
Extended Reading
