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Vincent: You know, there's a clown in my head and he shits in between my thoughts and he forces me to do the most inappropriate thing at the most inappropriate moment. So relaxing is pretty much the one thing I cannot do.
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Alex: [throws the doctor's car keys on the lake] Next time, don't give me a roommate.
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Marie: What the fuck?
Marie: Dead babies on the road!
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Vincent: Aaaah! Cunt licker! Fuck! What are you staring at?
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Alex: I'm Alex in Wonderland!
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Alex: [Vincent wants to climb a mountain] What if it sucks?
Vincent: What if it's amazing?
Alex: What if it's dangerous?
Vincent: What if it's exciting?
Alex: What if we die?
Vincent: What if we live?
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Vincent: Colon cancer rots your asshole...
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Marie: We're gonna crash!
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Vincent: This fucking sucks. Can't I get one fucking advantage out of this cocksucking illness? They only come when I don't want them and only comes in the worst motherfucking moments.
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Vincent: My brain is broken but all you have to do is eat something.
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Robert: You want to go to the ocean? You can't even get to 7-Eleven.
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Marie: [giving tour] Computer room, but the Internet blows. TV room, no cable. Game room, but they're all stupid. And finally, the sweet smell of gourmet shit.
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Vincent: What's so... What's so funny?
Marie: Nothing. Sorry.
Alex: It's just hard to tell were you stop and your tourettes begins.
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Alex: I love these.
[opens Vincent's mint tin in the wind]
Alex: What is on my face? What is on my face?
Marie: Vincent's mother.
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Robert: Vincent, stop! Don't be this person.
Vincent: Oh, what? What person am I being?
Robert: Me! You got my temper, that's for sure, but the rest of this, this isn't you. You're more like your mom. And thank God for that, because I will have completely failed you as a father if you end up anything like me.
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[last lines]
Alex: I'm starving. Let's go to Subway.
Vincent: Eat fresh latex, cunt.
Alex: You really love that word, don't you? Have you ever counted how many times you say that word a day?
Vincent: 62,175. For million and a half.
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Alex: I would give anything to be free from this, but it doesn't stop, and it's not my fault.
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Vincent: I'm in charge here. Not you, you cunt.
Alex: You're calling me a cunt?
Marie: That was his Tourette's you idiot!
Vincent: No, I said that on purpose.
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Dr. Mia Rose: Vincent's running away now makes complete sense.
Robert: Mind your own damn business.
Dr. Mia Rose: I am. That young woman is sick in knees to eat.
Robert: Yeah well, I was supposed to give a speech three hours ago instead of a middle of a lake looking for foggy keys with a shitty doctor who is less capable than my son.
Dr. Mia Rose: Now you're projecting.
Robert: What?
Dr. Mia Rose: Projecting, calling me a shitty doctor to makeup with the fact that you are a shitty father.
Robert: Oh yeah, you got me figured out. Too bad I was paying you to figure out Vincent.
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Dr. Mia Rose: How in god's name do you know how to do this anyway?
Robert: Hmmm, let's just say I wasn't always a politician.
Dr. Mia Rose: Huh!
Robert: What?
Dr. Mia Rose: Maybe the apple didn't fall far from the tree.
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Robert: [Just after saving the car crash] Are you alright?
Dr. Mia Rose: No. You?
Robert: No.
Dr. Mia Rose: Might I suggest that we stop at a hotel for a few hours?
Robert: Excellent idea.
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Robert: [Robert tries to unscrew the wheel nut] Ah... ah... god damn, fuckin' piece of shit.
Dr. Mia Rose: The apple really didn't fall far from the tree.
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Alex: Cause I wanted you to think I was cool. You don't know what it's like. I've got a lot to offer but these stupid rituals take over everything, made my world smaller and smaller. I'm stuck in a fucking cage. I'd give anything to be free, but it doesn't stop.
Vincent: It was pretty cool, the way you ran out of there
Marie: You did look pretty bad ass.
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Vincent: [Talking to Robert] See if I can get to a 7/11
The Road Within Quotes
Extended Reading