Star Trek: Insurrection Quotes

Captain Picard: Ru'afo, we're getting too old for this.

Ad'har Ru'afo: After today, that won't be a problem... for either of us.

Data: I feel obliged to point out that the environmental anomalies may have stimulated certain rebellious instincts common to youth, which could affect everyone's judgment... Except mine of course.

Cmdr. Beverly Crusher: Okay Data. What do *you* think we should do?

Data: Saddle up, lock and load!

Commander Riker: Do you think it's possible for two people to go back in time, fix a mistake they've made?

Counselor Deanna Troi: On this ship? Anything's possible.

[Referring to his clean-shaven face]

Commander Riker: Smooth as an android's bottom.

Counselor Deanna Troi: [after Will kisses her] Yuck!

Commander Riker: Yuck?

Counselor Deanna Troi: I've never kissed you with a beard before.

Commander Riker: I kiss you and you say "yuck"?

Admiral Matthew Dougherty: Jean-Luc, we're only moving 600 people.

Captain Picard: How many people does it take, Admiral, before it becomes wrong? Hmm? A thousand, fifty thousand, a million? How many people does it take, Admiral?

Commander Riker: Our guests have arrived. They're eating the floral arrangements on the banquet tables.

Cmdr. Beverly Crusher: I guess they don't believe in cocktails before dinner.

Counselor Deanna Troi: Oh, my God. Are they vegetarian? That's not in there.

Captain Picard: Perhap we should have the chef whip up a light balsamic vinaigrette, something that goes well with chrysanthemums.

Data: I seem to be missing several memory engrams.

[Geordi shows him several microchips he is holding in his hand]

Data: There they are.

Cmdr. Beverly Crusher: You either need a new uniform or a new neck.

Captain Picard: Yew-cheen-chef-faw. My collar size is exactly as it was at the academy.

Cmdr. Beverly Crusher: Of course it is.

Captain Picard: We're going to stop by Sector 441 on our way to the Goran system.

Geordi La Forge: They *are* in opposite directions.

[there is a blemish on Worf's face]

Captain Picard: Have you been in a fight, Mr Worf?

Lieutenant Commander Worf: [sighs] No sir... it is a "gorch".

Captain Picard: Gorch?

Data: [whispers] Pimple, sir.

Captain Picard: Oh... it's hardly noticeable.

[about Worf's pimple]

Commander Riker: Klingons never do anything small, do you?

Captain Picard: I wish I could spare a few centuries to learn.

Anij: It took us centuries to learn that it doesn't have to take centuries to learn.

Captain Picard: Mr. Worf, do you know Gilbert and Sullivan?

Lieutenant Commander Worf: No sir, I have not had a chance to meet all the new crew members since I have been back.

[to 300-year-old Anij]

Captain Picard: I should warn you - I've always been attracted to older women.

Captain Picard: In 300 years, you never learned to swim?

Anij: I just haven't got around to it yet.

Captain Picard: Data, what's the last thing you remember?

Data: [singing] His nose should pant, and his lip should curl...

Captain Picard: From the mission.

Captain Picard: Don't panic!

Anij: I've been shot at, thrown into the lake out of a ship that's come to abduct us - what's there to panic about?

Anij: Have you ever experienced a perfect moment in time?

Captain Picard: A perfect moment?

Anij: When time seemed to stop, and you could almost live in that moment.

Captain Picard: Seeing my home planet from space for the first time.

Anij: Yes. Exactly. Nothing more complicated than perception. We've discovered that a single moment in time can be a universe in itself, full of powerful forces. Most people aren't aware enough of the now to even notice.

Counselor Deanna Troi: Have you noticed how your boobs have firmed up?

Cmdr. Beverly Crusher: Not that we care about that in this day and age.

Counselor Deanna Troi: Uh huh.

Cmdr. Beverly Crusher: [notices Data] Thank you, Data.

Data: [walks over to Worf]

Lieutenant Commander Worf: I've an odd craving for the blood of a live Kolar beast.

Data: And have you noticed how your boobs have firmed up? Not that we care about tha...

Admiral Matthew Dougherty: We'll simply be restoring them to their natural evolution.

Captain Picard: Who the hell are we to determine the next course of evolution for these people?

[first lines]

[children playing hide and seek]

child: There he is. Let's get him, come on!

[last lines]

Captain Picard: Picard to Enterprise. Seven to beam up.

Captain Picard: [exchanges glances with Anij one last time]

Captain Picard: Energize.

[the Enterprise crew dematerialize]

Sona Officer: He wouldn't?

Lieutenant Commander Worf: Yes, he would!

Commander Riker: [the Enterprise is rocked by a photon torpedo from the Son'a ship] Photon torpedo. Isn't that the universal greeting when communications are down?

Geordi La Forge: I think it's the universal greeting when you don't like someone.

Commander Riker: [to Lt. Daniels] Tell them our transceiver assembly is down, that we can send messages but not receive them.

Lt. Daniels: I don't think they believe us.

Commander Riker: Why not?

[the Enterprise is rocked by a photon torpedo from a Son'a ship]

Commander Riker: Photon torpedo.

[Walking over to Geordi]

Commander Riker: Isn't that the universal greeting when communications are down?

Geordi La Forge: I think it's the universal greeting when you don't like someone.

Commander Riker: [referring to his shaven face] Smooth as an android's bottom, eh, Data?

Data: I beg your pardon, Sir?

Data: [later] Commander! May I?

[feels his face, shakes his head]

Data: [Artim is getting over his distrust of Data, and beginning to bond with him] My operation depends on specifications that do not change. I will never know the experience of growing up or tripping over my own feet.

Artim: But you've never had adults telling you what to do all the time, or bedtimes, or having to eat food you don't like.

Data: I would gladly accept the requirement of a bedtime in exchange for knowing what it is like to be a child.

Artim: Do machines ever play?

Data: Yes. I play the violin, and my chess routines are quite advanced.

Artim: No, I mean, haven't you ever just played? For fun?

Data: [tentative, unsure what the boy is getting at] Androids do not have fun.

Artim: Look, if you want to understand what it's like to be a child, you need to learn to play.

Admiral Matthew Dougherty: [after discovering Ru'afo's true intentions] We're taking this ship out of here. This mission is over.

Ad'har Ru'afo: It is NOT over!

Admiral Matthew Dougherty: It is over!

[Ru'afo suddenly attacks Dougherty]

Ad'har Ru'afo: I do not take orders from you!

[smashes Dougherty into a glass case and places him on an operating machine]

Admiral Matthew Dougherty: If you launch the injector while the planet is still populated, the Federation will pursue you until...

Ad'har Ru'afo: [icily] The Federation...

[activates the machine]

Ad'har Ru'afo: ... will never know what happened here!

[He lifts the face of Dougherty, killing him]

Captain Picard: Bridge to Commander Worf... Worf?

Lieutenant Commander Worf: Captain?

Captain Picard: I don't know how they do it on Deep Space 9, but on the Enterprise, we still report for duty on time.

Lieutenant Commander Worf: [Worf jumps out his bunk, bashes his head]

[on intercom]

Lieutenant Commander Worf: Sorry sir, I'm on my way.

Captain Picard: We'll skip the court martial this time. Picard out.

Gallatin: [after a failed attempt to capture all the Ba'ku on the planet] They're following the Kelvinite deposits, using the interference to block our transporters. Recommendations?

Admiral Matthew Dougherty: Take me down. Let me talk to Picard.

Ad'har Ru'afo: Oh, talk! We should send down an assault team and take them by force!

Admiral Matthew Dougherty: That is not an acceptable option. If people get hurt, all the support we have from the Federation...

Ad'har Ru'afo: Federation support. Federation procedures. Federation rules! Look in the mirror, Admiral. The Federation is old! In the past twenty-four months they have been challenged by every major power in the quadrant: The Borg, the Cardassians, the Dominion. They all smell the scent of death of the Federation. That's why you've embraced our offer. Because it will give your dear Federation new life. Well, how badly do you want it, Admiral? Because there are hard choices to be made, NOW! If the Enterprise gets through with news about their brave Captain's valiant struggle on behalf of the defenseless Ba'ku, your Federation politicians will waiver. Your Federation opinion polls will open up public debate. Your Federation allies will want their say. You... Need I go on?

Commander Riker: [Deanna absent-mindedly plays with the nape of his neck] You haven't done that in a long time.

Counselor Deanna Troi: What?

Commander Riker: What you're doing to my neck.

Counselor Deanna Troi: Was I doing something to your neck?

Captain Picard: Do you have everything you need from Command?

Counselor Deanna Troi: I've downloaded all the files on the duck-blind mission and the Son'a.

Captain Picard: You have two days to become experts.

Captain Picard: Mr. Worf, our job is to come up with a plan to safely capture Data.

Lieutenant Commander Worf: I've already had Commander La Forge modify this tricorder with one of Data's actuation servos. Its operational range is only four meters, but it will shut him down.

Captain Picard: Good to have you back, Mr. Worf.

Commander Riker: [reading up on the Son'a] Half-century ago, they conquered two primitive races, the Tarlac and the Ellora, and then integrated them into their culture as a labor class. Look at this. "The Son'a are known to have produced mass quantities of the narcotic ketracel-white. Their ships are rumored to be equipped with isolytic subspace weapons outlawed by the second Khitomer Accord."

Counselor Deanna Troi: Why would we be involved with these people?

Commander Riker: Good question.

Captain Picard: When was the last time we aligned the torque sensors?

Perim: Two months ago, sir.

Captain Picard: They don't sound right.

Geordi La Forge: [checking] The torque sensors *are* out of alignment. By 12 microns. You could hear that?

Captain Picard: When I was an ensign, I could detect a 3-micron misalignment.

Admiral Matthew Dougherty: Commander Data attacked us in a mission scout ship yesterday. Ru'afo and I have decided to send in an assault team.

Captain Picard: Commander Worf and I are working on several tactical plans to save...

Ad'har Ru'afo: Your android has turned dangerously violent, Captain. Considerable damage was done to my ship. He must be destroyed.

Admiral Matthew Dougherty: I know what Data means to Starfleet, Jean-Luc, but our crew is at the mercy of those people on the planet.

Captain Picard: If our first attempt to capture Data fails... I will terminate him. I should be the one to do it. I'm his captain... and his friend.

Admiral Matthew Dougherty: All right. You have 12 hours, Captain. Then I want you out of the Briar Patch. In the meantime, we'll head out to the perimeter to call for Son'a reinforcements, in case you fail.

Captain Picard: Understood.

Admiral Matthew Dougherty: Good luck, Captain. Dougherty out.

Captain Picard: We were under the impression they were being held against their will.

Anij: It's not our custom to have guests here at all, let alone hold anyone against their will.

Sojef: The artificial life form would not allow them to leave. In fact, he told us they were our enemies and that more would follow.

Anij: Are you our enemy?

Sojef: Anij.

Captain Picard: My people have a strict policy of non-interference in other cultures. It's our Prime Directive.

Anij: Your directive apparently doesn't include spying on other cultures.

Anij: At one time, we explored the galaxy just as you do.

Captain Picard: You have warp capability?

Anij: Capability, yes. But where can warp drive take us except away from here?

Commander Riker: You got a minute?

Counselor Deanna Troi: Sure.

Commander Riker: I need a little counseling.

Counselor Deanna Troi: Well, there's a first time for everything.

Commander Riker: [lying down, putting his head in her lap] So do I lie down or what?

Counselor Deanna Troi: Um... well, whatever makes you comfortable. But this isn't one of the usual therapeutic postures.

Commander Riker: But it is comfortable.

Counselor Deanna Troi: Mm-hmm. Why don't you try sitting up.

Commander Riker: Why don't you try lying down?

Counselor Deanna Troi: Well, you're in quite a mood today. Do you really need counseling, or did you come down here to play?

Commander Riker: I think I'm having a midlife crisis.

Counselor Deanna Troi: I believe you.

Commander Riker: I'm not sleeping well.

Counselor Deanna Troi: Dr. Crusher has something that can take care of that.

Commander Riker: What I need, I can't get from Dr. Crusher.

Geordi La Forge: I had to reconstruct Data's neural net and replace these. They contain memory engrams.

Captain Picard: How were they damaged?

Geordi La Forge: By a Son'a weapon. There's no doubt about it, Captain. That's what caused Data to malfunction.

Captain Picard: But the Son'a report claims that they didn't fire until after he malfunctioned.

Geordi La Forge: Well, I don't believe it happened that way.

Captain Picard: Why would they fire on him without provocation?

Geordi La Forge: All I know is that he was functioning normally until he was shot. Then his fail-safe system was activated.

Captain Picard: Fail-safe?

Geordi La Forge: His ethical and moral subroutines took over all of his basic functions.

Captain Picard: But you're saying he still knew the difference between right and wrong.

Geordi La Forge: In a sense, that's all he knew. The system was designed to protect Data against anyone who might try to take advantage of his memory loss.

Captain Picard: And yet he attacked us, and he told the Ba'ku that we were a threat.

Data: Captain, the boy is afraid of me.

Captain Picard: It's nothing personal, Data. You have to remember, these people have rejected technology.

Data: I am the personification of everything they have rejected.

Captain Picard: Until this week, that young man probably never saw a machine, let alone one that walks and talks.

Data: [discovering a Federation ship in the middle of a Ba'ku lake] It is a holographic projection. Incomplete, I might add.

Captain Picard: What you're seeing is a computer-driven image created by photons and force fields.

Anij: I know what a hologram is, Captain. The question is, why would anyone want to create one of our village?

Captain Picard: Data, if you were following the children and discovered this ship...

Data: It is conceivable I was shot to protect the secret of its existence.

Captain Picard: Why would they duplicate this village, except to deceive the Ba'ku?

Anij: Deceive us?

Captain Picard: To move you off this planet. You go to sleep one night in the village, wake up the next morning on this flying holodeck, transported en masse. Within a few days, they're relocated on a similar planet without ever realizing it.

Data: Why would the Federation or the Son'a wish to move the Ba'ku?

Captain Picard: I don't know.