St. Vincent Quotes

Brother Geraghty: [Oliver's new Catholic school classmates welcome him, albeit unenthusiastically] Maybe as a 'thank you', you could lead us all in morning prayer.

Oliver: [as the class members bow their heads, he whispers apologetically to the teacher] I think... I think I'm Jewish.

Brother Geraghty: [to Oliver] OK, good to know.

Brother Geraghty: [addressing the whole class] Oliver thinks he's Jewish.

random members of the class: So am I... I'm Buddhist... There is no God...

[now everyone speaks at once, sharing their religious preferences]

Brother Geraghty: Yes, you get the idea. We celebrate all the religions of the world in this room, Oliver. I'm a Catholic, which is the best of all the religions, really, because we have the most rules. And the best clothes. But among us, there is also a Buddhist, agnostic, we have a Baptist, and we have a "I don't know", which seems to be the fastest growing religion in the world. And now, we have "I think I'm Jewish", which is a new one for the class, Oliver, so thanks for that.

Vincent: You never seen Abbott and Costello?

Oliver: No, sir. Are they old?

Vincent: No. They're dead. That's the oldest you can be.

Oliver: Or the youngest. Time freezes when you're dead.

Vincent: You need to defend yourself, or you get mowed down.

Oliver: I'm small, if you haven't noticed.

Vincent: Yeah, so was Hitler.

Oliver: That's a horrible comparison.

Vincent: Indeed. Making a point, though.

[first lines]

Vincent: So this Irish guy knocks on this lady's door and says, you know, "Have you got any, uh... Any, uh... work for me?" And she says, "Um, well, you now, as a matter of fact, you could paint the porch." 'Bout two hours later, the guy comes back and says, "I've finished, ma'am, but just for your information, it's not a porch, it's a BMW."

[bar patrons stunned]

Oliver: Is that our new neighbor?

Maggie: Yep.

Oliver: It's gonna be a long life.

Maggie: [about Oliver's book] God, that's depressing.

Oliver: No, it's not. The tree was meant to give, so to be able to give everything and have nothing left is the best life the tree could ever have.

Maggie: Well, your father must think I'm a tree.

Oliver: Why would he think that?

Maggie: Nothing. Nothing.

Oliver: He's paying me hourly.

Vincent: I'm showing him how the world works. You work, you get paid, you drink.

Maggie: You're drinking alcohol?

Vincent: ...I honestly don't remember.

Vincent: A lady of the night.

Oliver: What's that?

Vincent: It's one of the more honest ways to make a living.

Ocinski: Hey, uh, your dad the one that taught you how to fight?

Oliver: No, my babysitter.

Zucko: Come on, Vinny! Why do you always have to do things the hard way?

Vincent: It's more interesting.

Zucko: And a lot more painful.

Oliver: What's Vin like when I'm not around?

Daka: [with Russian accent] He don't like people. People don't like him. Except cat, and you. Why you like him?

Daka: My water is broken!

Vincent: Call a plumber.

Oliver: Sorry, Vin, for your loss.

Vincent: Never understood... wh-wh-why people say that.

Oliver: They don't know what else to say.

Vincent: How about, "What was she like?" "Do you miss her?" Or "What are you gonna do now?"

Terry: It is what it is.

Vincent: "It is what it is"? Everyone's saying that now. You know what it means? You're screwed, and you shall remain screwed.

Judge Reynolds: [at a custody hearing, the judge is asking questions about Oliver's activities with Vin that his mother was unaware of] Daka Paramova... are you aware of her occupation?

Maggie: [whispering, to her attorney] She, she works for Vince.

Maggie: [to Oliver] She works for Vince, right?

Oliver: [whispering to his mother] She's the lady of the night.

Maggie: [astonished, still whispering] What? Do you know what that means?

Oliver: [with total naïveté, trying to be helpful] She works at night?

Maggie: [later, leaving the courthouse, Mom is livid] I guess gambling in a race track is like a Math class, huh? You can learn how to bet?

Oliver: The odds.

Maggie: A bar, I guess that could fall under Current Events, right?

Oliver: [still with complete sincerity and naïveté] More like Social Studies?

Maggie: It's a strip club hooker that I can seem to get my head around.

Oliver: Commerce? Biology?

Maggie: Just stop talking.

Vincent: You got any money?

Oliver: Yes sir, $7.

Vincent: What is that, lunch money?

Oliver: Yes sir.

Vincent: Well, you might as well the hard way.

Maggie: I thought you ate at Vincent's house.

Oliver: I had sushi.

Maggie: You had sushi?

Oliver: Well, sardines. He calls it sushi. Didn't want to hurt his feelings.

Vincent: I'm gonna show you one thing and it's probably your best shot. If you do it right, you can break the guy's nose.

Oliver: Break his nose!

Vincent: Relax! You're not gonna get it right.

Maggie: [shows tree diagram to Vincent] Okay.

Vincent: Money.

Maggie: No, it's a... it's a T... it's a tree.

Vincent: You owe me money. Yeah, you broke my tree.

Maggie: Alright.

[flips to next diagram card]

Maggie: Yeah, I know I... Lets...

Vincent: Yeah, you broke my fence too.

Maggie: [looks at the card and gets surprised to see a fence] Okay, what are you... planning these?

[flips to next card facing herself and then shows to Vincent]

Maggie: Here, this should be familiar.

Vincent: Cactus.

Maggie: No, prick. Big prick.

[flips to next card]