Something Borrowed Quotes

[Rachel falls on the dance floor in pain]

Dex: Are you alright?

Rachel: Yeah, no, I think I just pulled something.

Darcy: Your vagina?

Rachel: No, I didn't pull my vagina! I just pulled... near my vagina.

Rachel: You're an asshole!

Ethan: Yeah, maybe I am. But i'm the only asshole here who gives a shit about you.

Rachel: You're like a shark.

Marcus: That kind of hurts my feelings a little bit. I'm actually a pretty sensitive guy.

Rachel: Oh, really?

Marcus: Once when I was nine years old, I saved the life of a chipmunk.

Rachel: A chipmunk.

Marcus: He fell out of our tree and almost died. He didn't know what to do, he couldn't even move. So I built a tiny little splint for his tiny, broken leg. And I carried him around in a BabyBjörn. And all the kids in my neighborhood, they laughed. They made fun of me, they threw rocks at me, but I didn't care. You know why?

Rachel: Why?

Marcus: Because all I saw was this little fur ball that needed love.

Rachel: That's... really sweet.

Marcus: I know. So next time you wanna call somebody a shark, just remember the chipmunk.

[repeated line]

Rachel: Ethan, stop.

Ethan: So why do you do it? Why do you let her win?

Rachel: Because that's what Darcy does. Darcy wins. She always has. She sees things, she wants them, she gets them. Ethan, she got into Notre Dame. Do you know how hard it is to get into Notre Dame? It is impossible. But she did. And with her grades?

Rachel: What the hell was that?

Ethan: Me? You broke my nose.

Rachel: I'm sure I didn't break your nose.

Ethan: God. And what is all this about us having sex? Jesus, Rachel, just leave me out of your goddamn soap opera.

Rachel: No one asked you to get involved, Ethan.

Ethan: Really? So why have I been listening to this bullshit all summer? Rachel, do something. Because this is just pathetic. But you know what? At the end of the day, you two deserve each other 'cause he's never gonna do anything. You're never gonna ask him to, and let's be honest... you and I both know that, even if you did, she will never let you have him.

Ethan: Rachel. Okay, look, I get it. You're in a tough spot because you love him. But you gotta do something about it, Rachel. Because he's being a coward. If he breaks your heart, I'm gonna take a swing at him. Then I'm gonna let him beat me up.

Rachel: I gotta go to work. I'm late.

Ethan: I know! Rachel, that's the point. Be late. Better yet, quit. At least it would be a decision. Rachel! You're all going to hell anyway, so you might as well do something for yourself. For once. Rachel, you deserve to be happy.

Rachel: Then butt out. That would make me happy. I'll figure it out on my own.

Ethan: Oh. Oh, that's great. Let me know how that goes.

Rachel: [Running back to Dex in the rain] Dex! Dex! Dex!

Dex: What's wrong?

Rachel: I shouldn't have left.

Dex: No, it's okay. I understand.

Rachel: No. Six years ago. That night. I shouldn't have left. It wasn't okay what happened. None of it was okay.

Dex: Rachel...

Rachel: No, no, no, let me say it. Cancel the wedding. Tell her you can't marry her. I love you. I've always loved you. And I should've told you a long time ago, but I'm telling you now before it's too late. Before it's really too late. You're not the only one who hasn't been living his life. I haven't either, but I wanna live it now. And I wanna live it with you.

Dex: I can't, Rachel. I'm so sorry. I can't.

Darcy: [to Dex] You liar!

Dex: Are you kidding me?

Darcy: I thought you told me there was nobody in...

Dex: Darcy, you are pregnant! Are you pretending you're the wronged party here?

Darcy: Rachel? How could you do this to me?

Rachel: No, I never wanted to hurt you, Darcy. I never wanted to hurt you!

Darcy: Rachel! Rachel! How could you do this to me?

Rachel: Darcy, I never wanted to hurt you.

Darcy: I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I never want to speak to you again! EVER!

Darcy: [On the phone at the hair salon] You're where? It is one week before my wedding, Rachel, and you're in London?

Rachel: I know. I...

[Ethan shows Rachel what to say to Darcy. Notepad writes 'You're fiancé's a douche.' 'I just need some time.']

Rachel: I just need some time.

Darcy: You're my maid of honor. And you needed time? Are you kidding?

Rachel: I...

[notepad writes 'I'm madly in love w/Ethan!']

Darcy: Rachel, Rachel, the band you picked sucks. The caterer is a nightmare. You need to get back here right now. Right now.

Rachel: Darcy...

Darcy: Right now!

Rachel: No.

[hangs up]

Ethan: [about Dex] Oh my God. So when are you gonna tell him? Do you want me to tell him? I would love to tell him.

Rachel: It's none of your business. I told Darcy to marry him. I'm bowing out.

Ethan: Rachel, she just told you she's cheating. You want your opportunity, take it.

Ethan: I don't really get it. I don't get how you let her win all the time.

Rachel: Wow.

Ethan: Oh, no. "Wow" nothing. Because if the tables were turning, you'd think she'd let you win?

Rachel: Will you stop? What is it with you two? Why do you hate her so much?

Ethan: What are you talking about? I don't hate her. I hate the fact that you yield at her at every turn.

Ethan: You're kidding, right? You're not kidding? Did you see her acceptance letter?

Rachel: What are you talking about?

Ethan: Rachel, did you see the acceptance letter? Because I didn't. Do you remember when she asked Michael Jordan to the prom and they sent a form letter back saying he couldn't make it? How many times did she show us that letter? I could recite it right now. And that was a rejection. Do you really think if she were accepted that she would make us memorize that letter, too? Rachel, come on. She never got into Norte Dame.

Rachel: I didn't want him to pick me by default. I wanna be someone's first choice.

Ethan: Yeah. You are.

Darcy: Is that Dex's jacket? What is it doing here?

Rachel: Oh he just left it at the restaurant, I must've picked it up

Darcy: No... .No he didn't, 'cause he was wearing it today so...... What is it doing here? What is it doing here?

Rachel: Darcey.

Darcy: [smirking] where is he?

Rachel: Darcey.

Darcy: Where is he?

Rachel: [Silent shaking her head "no"]

Darcy: [Loudly as she bangs on the door] where is he?