Rounders Quotes

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating and entering KGB's underground gambling parlor] just walking in here makes me queasy, the brick walls, the fucking mopes at the table, the musty smell, I feel like Buckner walking back into Shea, but what choice do I have?

  • Professor Petrovsky: [to mike sitting across from him in a bar] The last thing I took away from the Yeshiva was this: we cant run from who we are, our destiny chooses us.

  • Teddy KGB: [to Mike, before their final game] If you don't have my money then you are mine.

  • Teddy KGB: [to Mike, referring to Grama watching them play nearby] It hurts doesn't it? Your hopes dashed, your dreams down the toilet. And your fate is sitting right besides you.

  • Mike McDermott: [in a gymnasium] Would you stop fucking around, for five goddamn minutes for once in your fucking life?

    Worm: Whoa, Jesus, what happened? My old man just walked in.

  • Mike McDermott: [Trying to impress Marinacci his observant skills is essential while playing poker] you were lookin' for that third three, but you forgot that Professor Green folded on Fourth Street and now you're representing that you have it. The DA made his two pair, but he knows they're no good. Judge Kaplan was trying to squeeze out a diamond flush but he came up short and Mr. Eisen is futilely hoping that his queens are going to stand up. So like I said, the Dean's bet is $20.

  • Mike McDermott: [His girlfriend says they don't have time for sex now]

    Mike McDermott: [sitting on their bed] I'll be really quick. You won't feel a thing.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating first lines, first getting dressed in their apartment, kissed his girlfriend as she sleeps, then going through belongings to find "three stacks of society", hidden inside a cigar box on top of his desk, inside the top left hand drawer of the same desk, hidden inside an empty VHS box entitled Caro's Pro poker Tells by Mike Caro, behind hidden inside the bottom and back left hand corner of a picture frame, and hidden inside a book entitled Super System by Doyle Brunson] Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in your first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating, after asking Jo to give his winnings to pay back Petrovsky, while on the street waiting for a taxi to bring him to the airport] First prize at the World Series of Poker is a million bucks. Does it have my name on it? I don't know. But, I'm gonna find out.

  • Mike McDermott: [sitting across from each other in a bar] If you had it to do all over again, knowing what would happen, would you make the same choice?

    Professor Petrovsky: [Smiling] what choice?

  • Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [before being punched in the mouth by Grama in the bathroom of a strip club] Where did you come up with the scratch for that? You've been rolling fags in the Village again, haven't you?

  • Worm: [referring to Mike's girlfriend Jo being too restrict on Mike's social life] She's really got him by the balls.

    Petra: [hunched on top on the bar in the Chesterfield] That's not so bad, is it?

    Worm: It depends on the grip!

  • [Mike's girlfriend has just left him over his broken promise not to play poker]

    Worm: You know what always cheers me up, when I'm feeling shitty?

    Mike McDermott: [siting in a chair in his apartment, with his head looking down] No, what's that?

    Worm: Rolled up aces over kings. Check-raising stupid tourists and taking huge pots off of them. Playing all-night high-limit Hold'em at the Taj, "where the sand turns to gold." Stacks and towers of checks I can't even see over.

    Mike McDermott: [his head looks up] Fuck it, let's go.

    Worm: [pointing at him] Don't tease me.

    Mike McDermott: [smiles] Let's play some cards.

  • Mike McDermott: [trying to convince Jo that his skillful in poker] Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas? It's a skill game Jo.

  • Teddy KGB: [to Mike, after Mike slow rolled him during their final game] Lays down a monster. The fuck did you lay that down?

  • Worm: [standing up facing him] I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the fuckin' rake.

    Mike McDermott: [siting in a chair in his apartment] What the fuck are you talkin' about. What saying?

    Worm: I-I don't know. There ought to be one though.

  • Mike McDermott: [before their final game, putting his chips in a poker tray] Uh, you know what? I got my five grand here. That's just fine by me. I'm going home.

    Teddy KGB: Fine. It's a fucking joke anyway. After all, I am paying you with your money.

    Mike McDermott: [turns around] What did you say?

    Teddy KGB: Your money... I am still up 20 grand... from this last time I stick it in you.

    Mike McDermott: [Narrating] They're trying to goad me, trying to own me. But this isn't a gunfight. It's not about pride or ego. It's only about money. I can leave now, even with Grama and KGB... and halfway to paying Petrovsky back. That's the safe play. I told Worm you can't lose what you don't put in the middle. But you can't win much either.

  • Teddy KGB: [Referring to Mike after their final game] He beat me... Straight up... Pay him... Pay that man his money.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating, while playing against Teddy KGB] I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage.

  • Taki: [referring to Mike winning a hand against all three of them with triple aces] What did you think he had? Does he look like a man beaten by jacks?

    Zizzo: Jacks are a monster compared to the crap you've played

    Taki: Fuuc you... fuck you...

    Zizzo: Fuck Me? Fuck You!

  • Teddy KGB: [after Mike raises in the very first game against Teddy] That's a position raise, I call.

  • Teddy KGB: [Offering Mike an Oreo cookie after he exchanges his cash for poker chips at his underground gambling parlor] Want a cookie?

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating during the college fraternity game] It's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating, while playing with other rounders against other players at the poker room in the Mirage] It's like the nature channel... you don't see Piranhas eating themselves, do you?

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating] The game is no limit hold 'em. The Cadillac of poker.

  • Mike McDermott: [after their final game] Are you satisfied now, Teddy? Because I can keep busting you up all night if you like.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating while entering Teddy KGB's underground gambling parlor] In "Confessions of a Winning Poker Player," Jack King said, "Few players recall big pots they have won, strange as it seems, but every player can remember with remarkable accuracy the outstanding tough beats of his career." It seems true to me, cause walking in here, I can hardly remember how I built my bankroll, but I can't stop thinking of how I lost it.

  • Teddy KGB: [to Mike] In my club, I will splash the pot whenever the fuck I please.

  • Worm: [to Roman and Maurice, chastising them for deliberately speaking Russian to each other while playing poker] You wanna see the seventh card, stop speaking fucking sputnik! I'm sure you guys were talking about Pierogies and snow but let's cut that out.

  • Worm: [Pretending to be a sore loser at the college fraternity game] Like my uncle Les used to say "When the money is gone, it's time to move on". So enjoy it, you secret handshaking assholes.

  • Mike McDermott: You comin' up?

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [sarcastically] No, I've been standin' out here all this time just to say hi.

    Mike McDermott: All right, listen, things haven't been that smooth on the homefront so, you know, tone it down a little, all right?

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [jokingly, intentionally, ignoring Mike's request] Tone done what, motherfucker?

  • Worm: [in a gymnasium] Now, what did I ever do to that guy?

    Mike McDermott: You fucked his mother

    Worm: [amused] yeah but she was a good looking older woman you gotta give me that.

  • Teddy KGB: [referring to Mike wining every hand by slow rolling him] No More! No! Not tonight! This son of bitch, all night he, "Check. Check. Check." He trap me!

  • Mike McDermott: [during their final game] That's 4,400. I'm gonna call you. Or else, I won't respect myself tomorrow morning.

    Teddy KGB: Respect is all you have left in the morning!

  • Teddy KGB: [showing Mike he won the hand with a higher full house] Aces full, Mike.

  • Teddy KGB: [after losing almost every hand because he underestimated Mike's poker abilities] Mr. Son of a bitch, let's play some cards!

  • Grama: [referring to Mike, growing impatient by waiting for Teddy to win all of Mike's money] Enough is enough, Teddy. Finish the fucking kid off.

    Teddy KGB: [referring to Mike] Hanging around, hanging around. Kid's got alligator blood. Can't get rid of him.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating] I've often seen these people, these squares at the table, short stack and long odds against them. All their outs gone. One last card in the deck that can help them. I used to wonder how they could let themselves get into such bad shape, and how the hell they thought they could turn it around.

  • Teddy KGB: That ace could not have helped you.

    [drops all of his chips onto the table]

    Teddy KGB: I bet it all.

    Mike McDermott: [laughs] You're right Teddy, the ace didn't help.

    [pushes chips towards the center and flops down his cards]

    Mike McDermott: I flopped the nut straight.

  • Mike McDermott: [sees his mouth is bleeding] What happened?

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [while waiting outside his apartment building] Nothing, she closed her legs too fast!

  • Mike McDermott: [after Moot Court] we're not going to talk? You left me pretty quick there

    Jo: You make like it was my decision

    Mike McDermott: Well, it wasn't mine: I came home and you were gone, you're just going to drop me like that?

    Jo: [Before breaking up with him] I learned it from you Mike. You always told me this was the rule. Rule number one: Throw away your cards the moment you know they can't win. Fold the fucking hand.

    Mike McDermott: Look this is our thing we're talking about alright? It's not some losing hand in poker

    Jo: I know exactly what we're talking about

    Mike McDermott: So, that's the last of it then?

    Jo: Yeah I would say good luck but I know it's not about "luck" in your game

  • Moogie: [behind the counter of his store convenient store] Hey, lemme ask you a question. In the legal sense, can fuckin' Steinbrenner move the Yankees? Does he have the fuckin' right to just move them?

    Mike McDermott: [while dropping off deliveries] How should I know that?

    Moogie: You didn't learn that yet?

    Mike McDermott: No, we get to Steinbrenner in third year law school.

    Moogie: Oh...

  • Jo: [sitting on his lap] What kind of a job is that going to be, Mike um, writing an opinion on high stakes poker?

    Mike McDermott: [sitting on their bed] Hon, you're the one that told me I should use my poker skills in the court room.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating a quote from a gambling maxim] You can shear a sheep many times, but skin him only once.

  • Worm: [in a gymnasium] Hey, I'm not gonna let a garbage can fall on my head.

    Mike McDermott: No, you're gonna jump out of the way and let it land on me.

  • Joey Knish: [interrupting their study group] Hey Jo, Long time.

    Jo: Knish. How are you?

    Joey Knish: The same.

  • Professor Petrovsky: [sitting across from each other in a bar] For generations, the men of my family have been rabbis in Israel before that in Europe, it was to be my calling. I was quite a prodigy. I was the "pride" of my Yeshiva. The elders said I had a forty year old understanding of the Midrash. By the time I was twelve by the time I was thirteen I knew I could never be a rabbi.

    Mike McDermott: Why not?

    Professor Petrovsky: Because for all I understood of the Talmud, I never saw God there.

  • Joey Knish: [talking outside the sauna room in the Russian and Turkish bathhouse] I'm listening. What do you need? 500? A grand?

    Mike McDermott: Huh? I need... I need 15,000.

    Joey Knish: Fifteen?

    Mike McDermott: Yep.

    Joey Knish: I need a blow job from Christy Turlington. Get the fuck outta here. $15,000?

  • Professor Petrovsky: [in his office] You're in trouble?

    Mike McDermott: Yes sir, I am, not with the law, I owe

    Professor Petrovsky: Gambling debt?

    Mike McDermott: Yes, it's not mine, I vouched for the wrong guy, now it's on me

    Professor Petrovsky: I understand, what will it take to be free of this?

    Mike McDermott: I need fifteen thousand tonight

    Professor Petrovsky: you know I want to help you but I'm not a wealthy man

    Mike McDermott: I know, it kills me to ask you this, I don't have any other play, if you can help me at all...

    Professor Petrovsky: I hate to see you like this and I want to help you, if it must be tonight, ten is the best I can do

    Mike McDermott: Will you do that?

    Professor Petrovsky: when my mother let me leave the Yeshiva, it nearly broke her, but she knew the life I had to lead and to do that is another mitzvah and for that: I owe.

    Professor Petrovsky: [writes a check] so you take this money and get yourself out of this trouble, you hear me?

    Mike McDermott: I promise I'll pay you back

    Mike McDermott: [nods] I know, good luck

  • Mike McDermott: [talking in one of the corners of the Russian and Turkish bathhouse] I never told anybody this, about eight nine months ago, I'm at the Taj it's late and I see Johnny Chan walk in and he goes and sits in the three hundred six hundred section and the whole place stops and everybody puts an eye on him, after a while there wasn't a crap going on because all the high rollers are over there watching and some of them playing but they're giving their money to him and say "oh", I played with the world champion", you know what I did?

    Joey Knish: What?

    Mike McDermott: I sat down

    Joey Knish: You need fifty to sixty grand to play right in that game

    Mike McDermott: I had six but I had to know

    Joey Knish: what happened?

    Mike McDermott: Played tight for an hour, folded mostly then I made a score

    Joey Knish: With what? aces or kings?

    Mike McDermott: Rags, I had nothing, but he raised and I decided I don't care about the money, I'm just going to out play the guy, I'm going to out play this guy, this hand, I'll re-raise

    Joey Knish: Re-raise? You play right back at him?

    Mike McDermott: Yeah, he comes back over the top at me trying bully me like I'm some tourist, I hesitate for like two seconds then I'll re-raise and he makes a move to his checks and he looks at me, check his cards and looks at me again, and he mucked it, I took it down

    Mike McDermott: [Flash back narrates Johnny Chan] did you have it?

    Mike McDermott: [Flash back narrates] I'm sorry John, I don't remember

    Mike McDermott: I got up and walked to the cashier, I sat with the best in the world, and I won

    Joey Knish: You made a fucking move on Chan you son of a bitch, so that's why you made that run at KGB's place

    Mike McDermott: That's right I'll do it again if I can

  • Grama: You owe twenty five I'll take the rest in five days

    Mike McDermott: [trying to reach an agreement to pay off Worm's debt to Grama and Teddy KGB] Five grand a week and you keep the juice going we want what you want we want to square this thing but three days is impossible no one's saying "your not the man", just think of it as a business decision, he just got out let's put him on a plan

    Grama: This is not the money store we're not negotiating I tell you how it works

    Mike McDermott: Then I'm asking

    Grama: [Intentionally belittling Worm] you looking for some charity?

    Worm: [feeling offended] , you know what?I need your fucking charity like I need your cock in my ass.

    Mike McDermott: [to Worm, irritated by his ego] Will you shut the fuck up?

    Grama: It's too late for him to shut the fuck up

    Mike McDermott: His good for it

    Grama: If you think his good for it then it's on you too

    Mike McDermott: Then it's on me too

    Grama: Fifteen large five days or I start breaking things.

  • Mike McDermott: [at the judges game] It's plenty wise we know what we're holding and we know what you're holding

    Judge Marinacci: The fuck you know what we all got

    Mike McDermott: Summer clerkship in your office says I know what your holding

    Judge Marinacci: I wouldn't bet with a job like that let's just say "I'll put you at the top of the list" if your right

  • Mike McDermott: [after have been caught base dealing, beaten up, and thrown out at the sheriffs game] What the fuck were you thinking?

    Worm: I was trying to give us an edge

    Mike McDermott: I had them

    Worm: Look I'm sorry we got banged up, I took a shot and missed, it happens

    Mike McDermott: Happens all the time around you

    Worm: And it doesn't happen to you? You're the one that flushed his whole bank roll on one hand

    Mike McDermott: Oh fuck you man, that was different

    Worm: How is that different? What makes you so fucking special? Why are all your moves so smart and noble and I'm always the idiot piece of shit? You act like you're only one with any ambition

    Mike McDermott: Then what's your ambition? I don't know, you tell me

    Worm: I don't know, I don't think like that

    Mike McDermott: No, you don't think

    Worm: No, I don't think like you, you always think you can beat the game straight up, that's not me, and I'm always going to look for that edge, always

    Mike McDermott: Alright, what's the edge now? We owe fifteen grand in a day and we're broke, what the fuck do we do?

    Worm: That's easy, we get the fuck outta dodge, we stay clear of the city for a while, we'll hit the road, we'll be up again in no time, this will all blow over, we'll have a ball.

    Mike McDermott: not a fucking chance I'm going to live like that, you talk to Grama, you get him to stake me

    Worm: it's not going to work, we're not dealing with Grama.

    Mike McDermott: [surprised] you said Grama was on his own

    Worm: [looks down, remains silent, having been caught in a lie]

    Mike McDermott: [insisting worm tell him the truth] you told me Grama was on his own

    Worm: KGB bankrolled him

    Mike McDermott: So you just fucked us right in the ass

    Worm: [showing the car keys] yeah, all the way, you see what I'm saying. no fooling around, it's highway time, you with me or not?

    Mike McDermott: no I'm not this time.

    Worm: [surprised] , you're really going back there?

    Mike McDermott: yeah

  • Worm: [while base dealing] Who wants more? I'm in, I'm staging a late night comeback, a "late night rally", just to warn you

    Vitter: [Grabs Worm's hand] Hold on there

    Worm: What are you doing?

    Vitter: Give me the deck

    Worm: Relax don't get so agitated

    Vitter: Looks like we got a rogue game here

    Worm: A what?

    State Trooper: What the hell is going on over here?

    Vitter: [Referring to Worm] This son of a bitch is base dealing, I caught a hanger

    Worm: A "hanger"? What are you saying? I don't even know what you're saying

    State Trooper: His saying you're dealing off the bottom of the deck

    Worm: Come on guys

    Sean Frye: [Referring to Mike] What'd he give him?

    Vitter: Seven of hearts

    State Trooper: [to Mike and Worm] You boys working? Are you professionals?

    Mike McDermott: No listen I was winning before this guy got here

    State Trooper: Let the cards do the talking, if the seven didn't help you we'll listen to what you have to say

    Worm: [Ozzie turns mike's cards over] hey, three of a kind you've Ozzie three sixes like...

    Vitter: SHUT UP

    State Trooper: [nervously] I'm just saying it was a three of a kind

    State Trooper: [Vitter gives him the deck of cards and he shows the ace of spades on the bottom] One last thing

    Worm: [All the state troopers stand up] Alright take it easy are you going to read us our rights at least?

  • Mike McDermott: [talking privately in one of the corners of the Russian and Turkish bathhouse] What can you do for me? I mean five hundred isn't even enough to get me started

    Joey Knish: Five hundred won't help, what's two grand going to do? What kind of trouble you in?

    Mike McDermott: With the worst kind, with the worst guy

    Joey Knish: KGB?

    Mike McDermott: Yeah

    Joey Knish: [referring to Worm] Didn't I tell you? Never let that guy ahold of you?

    Mike McDermott: You told me a lot of things

    Joey Knish: Yeah I did, and you don't listen, I tell you to play within your means, you risk your whole bank roll, I tell you not to over extend yourself, to rebuild, so you don't have to hock for more, I was giving you a living, showing you the playbook I put together off my beats and that wasn't enough for you

    Mike McDermott: This is the one time I don't need you to tell me how I fucked up, I know I fucked up, what I need from you is money, I need whatever money you can give me

    Joey Knish: That's the thing, this time there is no money, I give you two grand what's that buy you? A day? No I give it to you I'm wasting it

    Mike McDermott: That's fucking great

    Joey Knish: You did it to yourself, you had to put it all on the line for some Vegas pipe dream

    Mike McDermott: I took a risk, I took a risk, you see all the angles, and you never have the fucking stones to play one

    Joey Knish: Stones? you little punk, I'm not playing for the thrill of fucking victory here, I owe rent, alimony, child support, I play for money, my kids eat, I got stones enough not to chase card actions of fucking pipe dreams of winning the world series on ESPN, but about the money I've got to turn my back, I've got to say no

    Mike McDermott: That's fine I understand

  • Grama: [referring to worm] Where's your friend?

    Mike McDermott: His gone

    Grama: So you brought my money?

    Mike McDermott: I'm a little short

    Grama: How short?

    Mike McDermott: The whole way

    Grama: There must be some kind of story

    Mike McDermott: As you can see I can't pay you

    Grama: I can see you're banged up pretty good, you never should've vouched for that scumbag

    Mike McDermott: Maybe not

    Grama: You're leaving me no outs here

    Mike McDermott: Why?

    Grama: I can't trust that you're not playing me

    Mike McDermott: I'm not the one working with a partner

    Grama: [eventually implying Mike will be tortured] You want to take it up with KGB you go right ahead otherwise you got one day or this will feel like a Swedish massage.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating while waiting for a taxi to take him to the airport] I turned my ten grand into just over sixty, paid fifteen to Grama, six went back to the Chesterfield, and as for Worm, I figure we're even and after the ten going back to the professor I'm back where I started: "three stacks of high society"

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating during their final game] Doyle Brunson says" the key to no limit is to put a man to a decision for all his chips" Teddy's just did it his representing aces the only hand better than my cowboys I can't call and just give him a chance to catch I can only fold if I believe him in a heads up match your stack is almost as important as the quality of your cards I chopped one of his legs off in the first hand now all I have to do is lean on him until he falls over

    Mike McDermott: [Narrating] the rule is this: if you spot a man's tell, you don't say a fucking word I finally spotted KGB's and usually I'd let him chewing those Oreos until he was dead broke but I don't have that kind of time I've only got until morning not even Teddy KGB is immune to getting a little rattled

  • Mike McDermott: [In bar] Mind if I sit?

    Professor Petrovsky: Please, have a seat

    Professor Petrovsky: That was a nifty trick the other night

    Mike McDermott: Thank you

    Professor Petrovsky: Marinacci and the DA were ready to cut cards for your services, of course it was altogether a different trick you pulled today, the disappearing act at your meeting.

    Mike McDermott: Yeah, I figured I owe you an explanation.

    Professor Petrovsky: No, not to me, I'm sure there was a good reason you left, you just have to work harder, prepare and smooth things out with the others, I'm sure there was a good reason why you left.

    Mike McDermott: [nods]

  • Professor Petrovsky: [sitting across from each other in a bar] I know a magician doesn't reveal his secrets

    Mike McDermott: I'm not a magician

    Professor Petrovsky: If it wasn't "magic", how did you know what everyone held?

    Mike McDermott: It's a combination of things: I was watching when the cards came out, that's just an old habit with me, it's like breathing

    Professor Petrovsky: Watch the cards?

    Mike McDermott: I watch the cards but I also watch the player react to the cards. That's how I knew the DA made his two pair and judge Kaplan missed the flush, I was watching their eyes when they checked their river cards, their faces tell you everything

    Professor Petrovsky: [Confused] you watch the man? I never knew you had to calculate so much in cards

    Mike McDermott: here's some advice, just play premium hands, you only start with jacks or better if its good enough to call you've also got to be in there raising, tight but aggressive and I do mean aggressive, you've got to think of it as a war

    Professor Petrovsky: [Jokingly] you're officially never invited to our game again

    Mike McDermott: I don't blame you, put a guy like me in that game, cards don't even matter I'll play it blind

  • Mike McDermott: [sitting across from each other in a bar] You have a respectable profession

    Professor Petrovsky: Not to my family my parents were devastated, destroyed by my decision my father sent me away to New York to live with distant cousins I eventually found my place, my life's work

    Mike McDermott: What then?

    Professor Petrovsky: I amerced myself fully, I studied everything I could about the law I felt deeply inside that it was what I was born to do

    Mike McDermott: Did your parents get over it?

    Professor Petrovsky: No, I always hoped that I would find some way to change their mind, but they were inconsolable, my father never spoke to me again

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating while waiting in Jo's jeep for him to be released from prison] Worm's dad did the grounds, when he wasn't too fucking drunk, that's when we did them, of course the grounds weren't all we did, Worm put us into a scam a day on all the young aristocrats we went to school with, selling them dime bags of Oregano, nunchakus, or fire crackers from Chinatown, kept us in lunch money until the time we went from more than just pocket change and got caught we had the starting five take a dive against Friends Academy the point guard snapped and gave Worm up, they hauled him before the school board and offered him a deal " tell us who else was involved and we'll go easy on you" Worm didn't say a fucking word and got himself expelled, I stayed in school and graduated, not many friends can stand up for a friend like that.

  • Worm: [to Mike after Worm was released from prison] You've got to understand there's two economies in there, there's cash and there's trade, so I've got to keep three games going at once, a game with the white guys, a game with the brothers and a game with the guards, the trick is I've got to skim enough cash off the white guys so I can lose it to the guards so they can keep doing me favors and then I've got to trim enough smokes off the brothers so I can trade and keep living in the "style" I've grown accustomed to and I've got to do all of this without getting my ass kicked.

  • Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [referring to making money by playing cards after been released from prison] have you been working? Is your game sharp?

    Mike McDermott: [while driving them away from the prison] No, I'm off it

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: You're getting cold cards?

    Mike McDermott: No I quit

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: What, are you shitting me?

    Mike McDermott: I got cleaned out

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: Mike McDe, you lost?

    Mike McDermott: It was a real blood game over at KGB's place

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: You sat down with the mad Russian and he emptied your pockets?

    Mike McDermott: Yeah I didn't want to tell you while you were in prison, I didn't want to dispirit you.

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: So you're just a student now? What are doing for money?

    Mike McDermott: I'm driving Knish's truck

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: Oh my God, you're killing me, we've got to get you back in the game we're old partners, we're going to "run it" like we always did.

    Mike McDermott: No, I'm off it I really am, I'm done.

  • Worm: [sitting inside Jo's jeep, outside the fraternity house] Here's the play: I know this girl Barbra I was so close to banging her before I went away, she works as a hostess for all the trust fund babies in there, she got me in their game, she introduces me as her "cousin" from out of town who loves to gamble and wants to win at poker.

    Mike McDermott: It sounds solid, that's a nice hook up

    Worm: It's all the way nice, but I got this "feeling".

    Mike McDermott: What "feeling" is that exactly?

    Worm: You know this "feeling", I got the table all set, knife, fork, sauce...

    Mike McDermott: [Implying Worm doesn't have money to buy into this game] You just don't have the "steak"

    Worm: Exactly

    Mike McDermott: [Giving Worm money] here's two twenty, that'll get you started

    Worm: Two twenty? Thanks but that's like eleven bets I can't even get a table in here.

    Mike McDermott: Then forget this game I'll straighten you out in the city tomorrow.

    Worm: I'm already behind here.

    Mike McDermott: You just got out, what's the big fucking hurry?

    Worm: The hurry is other than you, there are five guys eagerly waiting my release.

    Mike McDermott: How much do you owe?

    Worm: Like ten.

    Mike McDermott: Ten?

    Worm: I can't even figure it out with the juice. I can get started on this easy if it's you and me working together.

    Mike McDermott: I heard you asking me before and I hear you asking now but I can't do that, I just can't do that, I've made promises.

    Worm: I totally understand, its fine. I'll just make a couple moves earlier than I would've before.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating at the judge's game] The amazing thing is, in this collection of great legal minds there isn't a single real card player.

  • Mike McDermott: [Using Petrovsky's money to play for him and narrating] I don't know if I'm going to bring my legal career to a crashing halt before it even starts but sometimes I just can't help myself.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating, after leaving the judges game] I tell you it's hard leaving that game, an open invitation to lay with those lames but I'm retired, and in my playing days, it'd be pretty sweet to have anyone of them owing me favors. The truth is I could always find games though, easy games, tough games, straight games, crooked games, home games. I can turn this truck onto the Jersey Turnpike and be at the Taj Mahal casino in two hours, but I've made promises I'm just a law student now.

  • Mike McDermott: [talking on the street, outside Chester Field club] You're in town for five fucking minutes and you already got a sign on your back

    Worm: That fucking Knish rat me out? Come on you've got to stop listening to that guy, he sees all the angles but doesn't have the balls to play any.

    Mike McDermott: That guy hasn't had to work in fifteen years

    Worm: You don't think that's work? Grinding it out on his leather ass? No thank you.

    Mike McDermott: I thought so too now I know what real work is, speaking of which are you going to get a job? Are you going to look? Or you're just going back to printing those credit cards? Are you going away again?

    Worm: First of all I wasn't "printing" I was "distributing" its different, second of all I'm never going back there, stop worrying so much.

    Mike McDermott: I want you to think long term, be smart every place in Manhattan they all keep books if you get listed as a "mechanic" not only you're going to get the shit kicked out of you you're not going to get a game anywhere in New York, it's just stupid it's bad business.

    Worm: This is what I love about you, you think about the big picture.

    Worm: But it's not me, I don't play the game straight up then if I lose I find some real work I see a mark I take them down, that's what I do, that's the way I live.

    Mike McDermott: I know you're the guy that taught me all the angles but I'm not the one with my nose open right now, I'm going to preach to you, those two guys in there they're not "rabbits" ,Roman and Maurice they're Russian outfit guys, not as bad as KGB but you don't want to be fucking around with those guys.

    Worm: Those fake Versace shirts and shit?

    Mike McDermott: You still got time, go back in there and lose their money back to them, and make it look good.

  • Joey Knish: [Referring to Worm] The guy's a cheat he always has been, right now his over at Chesterfield ruining your reputation with every lousy second he deals.

    Mike McDermott: I told him, did anybody else see you?

    Mike McDermott: No, nobody saw it I heard it, the snapping sound gave it away, had I known might not have noticed him turn around then I see him with the Mechanic's grip I know.

    Mike McDermott: Did you get into the office?

    Joey Knish: I tried to warn him but he looked right through me

    Mike McDermott: Alright I'll go get him

    Joey Knish: No, his ok now most of the players are at the tail end of a thirty six hour session they can't see straight, if his still there when Roman and Maurice start their game his going to wish he was still inside

    Mike McDermott: I'm going to go get him

  • Petra: [hunched on top on the bar in the Chesterfield] So how'd you do?

    Worm: [Hands her his winnings in poker chips] So, so, six thousand, two thousand and here's two more

    Petra: Alright so its ten grand total, take back the two we lent you, give you the "white meat."

    Worm: [leaning on front the bar] you know what? Why don't you give me all of it?

    Petra: Usually credit players leave with their profit otherwise the juice starts five points a week on Mike

    Worm: Ok we'll owe you

  • Jo: [talking on the street] Do you know why I left this morning? I found that gangsters roll in your pocket

    Mike McDermott: It's not what you think

    Jo: Who do you think I am? You lie right to my face, in old days you never lied, you've lost everything but at least you never lied

    Mike McDermott: Last night I sat down at this card table and it was the first time I felt alive since I got busted at KGB's joint

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating] The game in question is no limit Texas hold'em minimum buy in twenty five thousand dollars a game like this doesn't come around often outside the casinos, the stakes attract rich flounders and they in turn attract the sharks, each player is dealt two cards face down then five cards are dealt face up these are known as community cards everyone can use to make the best five card hand, the key to the game is playing the man, not the cards, there's no other game in which fortunes can change so much from hand to hand, a brilliant player can get a strong hand, crack go on tilt and lose his mind along with every chip in front of him, this is why The World Series of Poker is decided on a no limit hold'em table, pro's won't play no limit they can't handle the swings but there are others like Doyle Brunson consider no limit the only pure game left, "Like Papa Wallenda said, "Life is on the wire, the rest is just waiting."

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating while driving with Worm towards The Mirage] The poker room at The Mirage in Vegas is the center of the poker universe. Doyle Brunson, Johnny Chan, Phil Hellmuth the legends consider it their office, every couple of days a new millionaire shows up wanting to beat a world champion. Usually they go home with nothing but a story, down here the millionaires are scarce or they're playing craps, there's still plenty of money there for the taking, in fact you can't game in the city because the New York rounders are taking out the tourists here.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating while driving Knish's truck and making deliveries for him] you don't hear much about guys who take their shot and miss, I'll tell you what happens to them: they end up humping crappy jobs on grave yard shifts, trying to figure out how they came up short. I had an picture in my head of me sitting at the big table Doyle sitting to my left Amarillo Slim to my right, playing in The World Series Of Poker and I let that vision blind me at the table against KGB now the closest I get to Vegas is West New York, driving down this lousy route from Knish to rounders who forgot the cardinal fucking rule: always leave yourself out.

  • Mike McDermott: [leaning on the wall, talking on the sidewalk outside Teddy KBG's gambling club, in the middle of the night] I lost everything I lost my case and I lost my tuition

    Joey Knish: [standing in front of him] Happens to everyone, from time to time everyone goes bust, you'll be back in the game before you know it

    Mike McDermott: I'm done

    Joey Knish: They all say that at first, let me stake you, standard deal fifty percent of your winnings, if you lose it's on me

    Mike McDermott: I'd just throw it away you still got the truck?

    Joey Knish: Sure, come on

  • Grama: [coming up from behind him] I heard you were out

    Worm: [sitting down at a strip club] Hey, how you doing? I was just thinking about you, I could use you see me in two weeks I'll put you back on the payroll

    Grama: I got bad news for you Worm I'm out on my own now

    Worm: Really? Go figure

    Grama: A lot of people were angry when you went away

    Worm: [shows him a roll of cash] I know that's why I'm trying to put together a roll here

    Grama: A lot of people asking if I could help if I knew where to find you so it got me thinking

    Worm: [sarcastically, before Grama drags him into the bathroom] Really? You're thinking now? That's big

    Grama: [Inside the bathroom] Here's what I'm thinking: instead of you owing fifteen grand spread out to five guys, you owe twenty five to me

    Worm: What? Where the fuck do you get off?

    Grama: where do I get off?Here's how it is, twenty five to me and the juice is still running

    Worm: Jesus Christ, what the fuck are you doing? You were my partner

    Grama: No I was your lackey, but I learned a few things Worm I consolidated your outstanding debt

    Worm: Where did you come up with the scratch for that?

    Grama: What I did was go partners with an old friend of yours Teddy KGB backed me

    Worm: Bullshit

    Worm: Teddy has plenty of goons why would he put you under his play?

    Grama: Because as soon as he heard your name he became excited about the prospect

    Worm: So you bought me up Grama?

    Grama: Yeah, a real sweet deal too thirty cents on the dollar, not a lot of faith out there in the business community

    Worm: Great so you're a banker now? That's real classy

    Grama: Not exactly I don't have to tell you my collection methods

  • Mike McDermott: [In a car outside the State Troopers game] How the hell am I supposed to get in this game?

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: I told to its easy the whole time in the joint I was dumping money to guards this one guy Pete Frye, I must've lost ten grand over eighteen months, he said when if I ever want a game just look up his nephew, you just go in there and ask for "Sean Frye" you're going to clean this game up these guys are total suckers

    Mike McDermott: Alright give me like eight hours come back at seven, seven thirty

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: I was thinking "what am I going to do for eight hours?" why don't I come in and just sit for a little while?

    Mike McDermott: No, not a chance

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: I'll sit at the other table and play "straight"

    Mike McDermott: You want to play "straight"? You go in there I'll be back in eight hours

  • Mike McDermott: [Realizes Jo left him, sitting in a chair in his apartment] I always told her she'd be a good card player, she'd know exactly know when to release a shitty hand

    Worm: [standing in front of him] Oh come on forget that this girl is obviously wrapped way too tight for a living

    Mike McDermott: I knew it, I fucking knew it

    Worm: This is depressing you can't trust them, you can't trust them at all, you domesticated yourself for this girl you took yourself out of life you walked a fucking line for her and the minute you want a little of it back she walks out on you

  • Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [before heading to the poker room, a prostitute walks past them in the lobby of The Mirage casino] why don't you warm up a sit for me?

    Mike McDermott: What?

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: I got certain "needs" I have to attend to I'm overdue

    Mike McDermott: [jokingly, referring to his time in prison] Good I was starting to wonder about you, I thought maybe the boys upstate brought about a few changes in you

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: hey, In your dreams lover

  • Mike McDermott: [narrating while waiting in Jo's jeep for him to be released from prison] I met Worm at Dwight-Englewood Preparatory Acamdemy in New Jersey, we were only two kids attending that didn't have a trust fund, my father's office was there,it said "custodian" on the door, that's why they took me.

  • Joey Knish: [walking up to their poker table with Mike playing with other rounders in the poker room at The Mirage] This is what I like to see Mike McDermott where he belongs, sitting with the scum bags telling jokes dragging the occasional pot.

    Guberman: [sarcastically] occasional? like my occasionally went out with other men

    Joey Knish: I was actually going to try to make some real money tonight but in Mike's honor return to the ring, I'll sit with you all for a while

    Petra: don't do us any favors, they're about to go to the boards to fill these seats

    Zagosh: you know if we wanted to take each other's "rolls" we could've just stayed home

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating while playing with other rounders against tourists, conventioneers, and other players in the poker room at The Mirage in Atlantic City] these two have no idea what they're about to walk into, down here to have a good time they figure, "why not give poker a try? after all how different could it be from the home games they've played their whole lives?" All the luck in the world isn't going to change things for these guys, they're simply over matched, we're not playing together but then again we're not playing against each other, they wear their "tells" like signs around their necks, facial tics, nervous fingers the hand over the mouth, the way a cigarette is smoked, little unconscious gestures that reveal the cards in their hands. We catch everything if a fish acts strong he's bluffing, if he acts weak his got a hand, it's that simple.

  • Mike McDermott: [eating together at The Noodle Bar inside The Mirage] What's with kiting my checks?

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: I'm on empty that's why

    Mike McDermott: You're tapped again? How much was the hooker?

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: "Relaxation therapist" that's not where it went

    Mike McDermott: You lost it to Roman and Maurice? I told you, you didn't have to give it all back to them, take some money for your time

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: That's not where it went either. I ran into Grama tonight he took everything I had

    Mike McDermott: Who's he working for?

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: His sort of out on his own, this fucker went around and bought up all my debt

    Mike McDermott: That turn coat motherfucker you kidding me? So what'd you owe him?

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: I don't know his crazy gorilla math, like fifteen

    Mike McDermott: Fifteen?

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: Yeah he said the juice has been running the entire time on my ten

    Mike McDermott: Why didn't you tell me that? I could've paid that off, I had the money

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: I'm not going to sit in the can and have my friend pay off my debt, I'm not a leech, we can help each other like always that's why we've got to get into the bigger games

    Mike McDermott: You know I'll help you, fuck that guy, we'll figure something out

  • Petra: [in his apartment] Tomorrow's a week

    Mike McDermott: A week of what?

    Petra: The first two thousand you owe the Chesterfield

    Mike McDermott: Oh, worm

    Petra: Yeah it's kind of weird he just won eight grand why go out on the line on another two?

    Mike McDermott: [referring to the amount of money Worm won] So he took off eight from Roman and Maurice?

    Petra: Yeah he comes in after you leave, about twenty minutes later he cashes out for the full amount Maurice hasn't been back since, his been playing across the street, but Worm's been around playing, his run you up just under seven grand

    Mike McDermott: Do me a favor and put him on his own?

    Petra: Yeah?

    Mike McDermott: Yeah cut him off

  • Worm: [in a gymnasium] What do you want me to say? Those were wild times you were there too

    Mike McDermott: Nothing's changed you were hiding from your troubles then and your hiding from your troubles now

    Worm: I like to hide that's part of the fun for me

    Mike McDermott: If we fucked up back then the worst thing that could happen was catch a beating or get expelled, you're fixing to go down it's almost as if you want to

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating, while going to see Grama to tell him he doesn't have the money to pay off Worm's debt to him] I know all the reasons I shouldn't be here: sometimes reasons don't matter, no one's stood up for Worm his been kicked around his whole life from his father on down, maybe his not the same guy he was when he went away but I can't give up on him that easily, I'm all his got

  • Mike McDermott: [while walking in the street, referring to the amount of money they have to make in order to pay off Worm's debt to Grama] Fifteen grand in five days I can do that I've gone on rushes like that before

    Worm: [referring to the amount of cash his carrying right now] On optimum conditions with a bank roll, maybe, what'd you got on you?

    Mike McDermott: I got like three fifty

    Worm: That's twelve hundred between us we might've play the lotto

    Mike McDermott: You find the games you scout them out I sit I mop them up

    Worm: We might have a shot at this if we sat down and did our thing

    Mike McDermott: No I'm going to do that, I'm going to do this straight up

  • Worm: [while getting shaved in a barbershop, referring to the amount of money they have on hand] We got seventy three hundred we've got to double that in two days

    Mike McDermott: If we get close and come up a little short...

    Worm: If we come up a little short Grama will shoot us and bury us in a hole somewhere

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating, while playing in the sheriffs game] Generally the rule is: the nicer the guy, the poorer the card player, these guys despite being cops are real sweet hearts. I'm right on schedule, I'm up forty two hundred. The morning can't get here soon enough.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating, while on his way to tell Grama he doesn't have the money to pay off Worm's debt] Fold or hang tough, fold or raise the bet. These are decisions you make at the table, sometimes the odds are stacked so clear there's only one way to play it other times like holding a small pair against two over cards six to five or even money, either way then it's all about feel what's in your guts

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating, first seeing Joey in Teddy KGB's underground gambling parlor walking towards me, uses his hat to cover his stacks of poker chips] Joey Knish is a New York legend his been a "rounder", earning his living at cards since he was 19 years old, he's as close to a friend in this place, but tonight I don't want to see him.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating, while in Teddy KGB's underground gambling parlor] he doesn't look like much but KGB is connected to all the way to the top of the Russian mob, he's the one guy you dont' want to fuck with. But if you're looking for high stakes, this is the only place in town, they all know me as a "small timer", but that's about to change.

  • Joey Knish: [to Mike, referring the stacks of poker chips hidden underneath Mike's hat, before lifting up the hat] you holding those for somebody?

    Mike McDermott: [to Joey, smiling] yeah, I was holding it for you

    Joey Knish: [amused, to Mike] you should be, because I hope you're not thinking of putting all that "glimmer" in play

    Joey Knish: [to Mike, gently grabs his arm and tries to find an empty seat at another table] come here, you don't want to "butt onions" with these guys because they can chew you up, and take your whole bank roll

    Mike McDermott: so, you say

    Joey Knish: there's plenty easy games, we get outta here, get some coffee, ride over to that "soft seat" in Queens

    Mike McDermott: I know what I'm doing

    Joey Knish: making a run at, aren't you? Rolling up a stake and going to Vegas, am I right?

    Mike McDermott: I can beat the game

    Joey Knish: [to Mike eventually he looks up and gives Joey a serious look] maybe, maybe this game can be beat, but you know you can beat the ten twenty at the Chesterfield, and high low game at 79th street, ok I understand

  • Worm: [to Mike before he drives off after Worm was caught base dealing, and they were both beaten and thrown out of the sheriffs game] See ya when I see ya, atleast you're "rounding" again right? You're gona thank me for that some day.

  • Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [after leaving the golf pro game, referring to Mike losing a big pot] What are you doing in there?

    Mike McDermott: I didn't "have it"

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: You didn't "have it"? What does that mean you didn't "have it"? Since when do you have to have it" to take a pot off a hump like that? Come on, grade schoolers can play better than that.

    Mike McDermott: I was "waiting" the guy out, eventually he was going to bluff at the wrong pot, then I was going to take it

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: You know what? Fuck all that, we don't have time for that shit, that guy was papier Mache, you gotta make "strong moves"

    Mike McDermott: The "move" was folding: I can't lose what I don't put in the middle.

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: Jesus, fuck all that because we needed that pot.

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [referring to the amount of money they've won so far] What are we up to?

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [after looking at the roll of cash Mike handed to him] That's like seven with that pot you just dumped on that "V-neck sweater, we would've had ten.

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [frustrated, remains silent]

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [seeing Mike tired, referring to the amount of time Mike has been playing without stopping] Look at you, you went one sixty-four-hour session, you need a nap.

    Mike McDermott: I don't have time for a fuckin nap.

  • Mike McDermott: [repeated line]

    Mike McDermott: I can't lose what I don't put in the middle.

  • Worm: [while taking poker chips from Mike at the poker room inside The Mirage casino] let's get started, shall we?

    Taj Dealer: [to worm] I'm sorry sir you can't take chips from another player at the table

    Card Player: [referring to the other rounders at the table, before turning to the player sitting to his right] you know what we all know each other here, we're like friends, so if nobody complains, do you have a problem?

    Card Player: it's alright

    Worm: there's no problem

    Taj Dealer: sir, you have to buy them from me

  • Mike McDermott: [while leaving Grama's brothel after failing to convince him to give them more time to pay back worm's debt to him and Teddy KGB] what the hell are you doing?

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [explaining why he mouthed off which resulted in failing to convince him to give them more time to pay back his debt to him and Teddy KGB] I'm not going to get down on my knees for that jerk off

    Mike McDermott: all I said was to keep your mouth shut for like five seconds.

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [realizing his pride got the better of him] I'm sorry

    Mike McDermott: God damn it

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: that's it, I mean I'm really "sunk" now

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [before they begin to list the poker games they can play and win enough money to pay back worm's debt to Grama and Teddy KGB] where do you want to start?

    Mike McDermott: [referring to the amount of the poker blinds in the poker game] look there's the 30/60 at The Chesterfield, there's the 4am in Woodside, There's the Greeks.

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: alright there's union game in Jersey I know a guy's cousin can get us in

    Mike McDermott: that's four

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: there's the cigar shop in Brooklyn is an easy clean

    Mike McDermott: there's a golf pro game in Riverdale

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: that's a good one

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: yeah there's a lot of money in that one

    Mike McDermott: that's six

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: you sure you're up for this?

    Mike McDermott: [feeling confident] I'm fuckin up for this

  • LaRossa: [while playing against mike with Worm watching, referring to the size of the pot] I bet the full amount

    Mike McDermott: [attempting to determine his bluffing] full amount huh? Let me look at you

    LaRossa: [remains silent while smoking a cigarette]

    Mike McDermott: [realizes he was bluffing] nope you didn't do it this time, I'm going to raise you

    LaRossa: [folds his hand frustrated]

  • Mike McDermott: [playing in the cigar shop] I bet 50

    Sunshine: I'll call, what'd you got?

    Mike McDermott: [referring to his hand of ace to five straight] I have what's known as "the wheel", it's got earthy tones, the smooth draw to win me the high and low

  • Johnny Gold: I bet

    Mike McDermott: [while playing at the golf pro game, referring to increasing the size of the pot] let's get some in there.

    Johnny Gold: you're raising me three hundred?

    Johnny Gold: [after checking if he has enough money to call] I call your three hundred

    Johnny Gold: [to his friend, referring to the pot] how much is in there?

    Weitz: about fifteen hundred

    Johnny Gold: [while adding money to the pot] here's a thousand, there's five hundred: I bet you the pot limit kiddo

    Weitz: you sure you want to do that? You might want to leave a little something extra for your daughter's riding lessons

    Johnny Gold: there's plenty more where that came from

    Mike McDermott: [folds his hand] take it down

    Johnny Gold: [laughs, to his friends] I got shit, look I bluffed "the big ringer"

    Lester 'Worm' Murphy: [urgently to Mike while collecting their money to leave] get up, we're out of here, we're done, come on

    Johnny Gold: [arrogantly to Mike and Worm as they leave, implying he can beat anyone at poker] anytime, anyplace anywhere, oh by the way anybody.

  • Mike McDermott: [after walking up to the poker table and putting his money on the table in the poker room inside The Mirage casino at Atlantic City, referring to that all the "rounders" at this table that regularly play at The Chesterfield club in New York City] this is beautiful, welcome to the "Chesterfield South."

    Taj Dealer: [announcing to the pit boss how much money Mike gave her] changing five hundred

    Mike McDermott: [jokingly to the other "rounders," at the table] I came all the way to Atlantic City just to see your mugs huh?

    Petra: [Jokingly, referring to seeing Mike playing at a lot card games recently] twice in one week, for someone that don't play spend a lot of time in card rooms

  • Mike McDermott: [after walking up to his poker table inside the Sheriffs game] Sean Frye?

    Sean Frye: that's right

    Mike McDermott: yeah, your uncle Pete told me to come by if I was ever around here

    Sean Frye: [referring to if he met his uncle while in prison] are you one of his "students"?

    Mike McDermott: [realizing what he meant] oh no, no, no. I wasn't "inside"

    Sean Frye: then you know him from Huntington huh?

    Mike McDermott: yeah he took me for like a grand at The Lodge

    Sean Frye: that's the buy in here, we play twenty/forty studs, grab a seat

  • Mike McDermott: [narrating while playing against teddy KGB] Here's the beauty of this game: I just got top two pair on the flop and I want to keep him in the hand. Against your average guy, I'd set a "bear trap", hardly bet at all, let him walk into it. But KGB's too smart for that. So, what I've got to do is over bet the pot,make it look like I'm trying to buy it.

    Mike McDermott: I bet two thousand

    Mike McDermott: [narrating] Then he plays back at me, and I get paid off.

    Teddy KGB: [after reaching an Oreo cookie, splitting in two halves and putting the right half in his mouth] call

    Mike McDermott: [Narrating] My guess is Teddy's on a flush draw.

    Teddy KGB: [checking his turn] Burn and turn.

    Mike McDermott: [Narrating, while the turn card is dealt] There's my money card, nine of hearts. I got a full house.

    Teddy KGB: [checking his turn, slow playing his hand] To the bettor.

    Mike McDermott: Check's good.

    Mike McDermott: [Narrating] Now I hope a spade falls and Teddy makes his flush. That way he'll bet strong, and I'll beat him with my nines full over aces.

    Teddy KGB: I'm going to bet fifteen thousand

    Mike McDermott: [requesting a time out to think] time

    Mike McDermott: All right, I call your fifteen plus I have another thirty three to raise you. Yeah, I'm gonna go all in, 'cause I don't think you got the spades

    Teddy KGB: You are right. I don't have spades.

    Mike McDermott: [Narrating] I know before the cards are even turned over.

  • Professor Petrovsky: [seeing Mike after he knocked on the door] Oh, Michael. You got some things for me?

    Mike McDermott: [while carrying file folders] Yes, I do.

    Professor Petrovsky: Put them on the desk, it's all right

    Judge Marinacci: Kid, is he paying you for this late night shift?

    Mike McDermott: Oh, well, knowledge is my reward, sir.

    Judge Marinacci: Let me tell you, it ain't worth it. Why don't you become a jockey, do something useful.

  • Professor Petrovsky: [to his coleagues during the judges game] Michael is lead counsel in the Moot Court you're presiding over next week. Besides, he could use the background if he's gonna clerk for one of you fellas this summer, right?

  • Dowling: [giving Mike advice during the judges game] Yeah, look, a word to the wise. Stay in the private sector. That Nassau defense attorney's game? They use our chips for coasters.

  • Mike McDermott: [Narrating] The amazing thing is, in this collection of great legal minds, there isn't a single real card player

  • Worm: [during the sheriffs game] Ace high bets

    Osborne: Well, I like what I have, my bet is twenty

    Mike McDermott: [after looking at his hand and at Osborne , intentionally folding to avoid both of them getting caught base dealing] I know that look. I'm gonna fold.

  • Jo: [during their study group] I think the most important thing is to be respectful to the judges but not obsequious

    Kelly: Now, wait a minute. Make sure to be "deferential"

    Mike McDermott: [just walking up to their study group table] Gene Marinacci won't buy "deferential"

    Steiny: Oh, it's Gene, is it?Well, I knew there was a reason why you were lead counsel, and it's got nothing to do with your punctuality.

    Mike McDermott: Sorry. I couldn't find a cab.

    Jo: [to Mike] Anyway, when you make the opening remarks, make sure you stick to the fact pattern. And use the right cites. Use book cites, not Lexis.

  • Professor Petrovsky: [during Moot Court] Mr. McDermott, perhaps we can begin now.

    Mike McDermott: I'm so sorry I'm late

    Judge Marinacci: Come to order in the matter of Slater v. New York State Higher Education Services.The facts have been stipulated, the briefs have been read. Lead counsel for plaintiff, Mr. McDermott, please proceed with oral arguments now. If that is convenient for you

    Mike McDermott: [sensing the judges are irritated that he disrespected them by not arriving on time] Yes, it is, and again, I'm sorry that I'm late. The case which controls the issue at bar would be Texas v. Johnson...

    Judge McKinnon: [interrupts him] Texas v. Johnson?Mr. McDermott, that is a Supreme Court free speech case that has no bearing in the premises

    Judge Marinacci: Each group was apprised to ignore that aspect of this matter and focus instead on the idea of de facto segregation

    Mike McDermott: Right. Um, well...

    Kelly: [interrupts him by standing up to continue the oral arguments] Mr. McDermott has been unreachable so I'll take over, if it pleases the court

    Judge Marinacci: Someone saying something "meaningful" would please us a great deal.

    Kelly: What we have here is a clear case of gerrymandering, impacting schoolchildren and schools in the district that was created solely to separate students by race. Although not dispositive, the student body is more than ninety percent white.

  • Mike McDermott: [referring to making deliveries for Knish on the graveyard shift] These fuckin' long nights are killing me.

    Jo: [implying he used to play cards all night] They never used to.

    Mike McDermott: Yeah, well, that's different. I mean, that was like I buy in at eight o'clock, next thing you know it's morning. But hey, you know, I think I'm "hooked up" for this summer

    Jo: "Hooked up" how?

    Mike McDermott: Well, after I left you last night at the library, I impressed Judge Marinacci. I think I might be in line for a clerkship

    Jo: [becoming intrigued] Tell me more

    Mike McDermott: Well, those guys were all playing cards, and...

    Mike McDermott: [sensing she'll become angry and upset that he broke his promise to her to quit playing cards] hear me out now, just hear me out. They were playing cards and I "read" his hand "blind."

    Jo: So, instead of coming home, you went out and played cards with some judge?

    Mike McDermott: No, I wasn't even playing. They were playing. I just caught his eye by "reading" his hand, that's all. I mean, as long as I don't fuck up Moot Court, I think the job's mine.

  • Jo: [to Mike, referring to that she was the one to encourage him to use his poker skills in the courtroom] Yeah, I know I said that, but You know what I meant. I meant that you should use your head. You know, the way you calculate odds on the spot, the way you "read" people. I didn't mean it as a way to con your way into a summer job

    Mike McDermott: con? I was "networking".

    Jo: [amused] "Networking". Are you trying to con me now?

    Mike McDermott: no

    Jo: I just I don't think you get it. You'll be just like one of those ex-college athletes. You know, have a great job at the D.A. 's office as long as they never miss a lawyer's league game. It's true. I just think if you get in this way, you'll always be a hustler to them.

    Mike McDermott: Baby, I didn't even play.

    Jo: Okay. I'll see you later.

  • Joey Knish: [in the Russian and Turkish bathhouse, sees Mike with a broken nose] you look like Duane Bobick, after one round with Norton, what the fuck happened to you?

    Mike McDermott: [Implying Worm got him beaten up] Worm

    Joey Knish: When you gonna listen?

    Mike McDermott: I'm listening

  • Cabbie: Where you headed?

    Mike McDermott: I'm going to Vegas

    Cabbie: Vegas huh?

    Mike McDermott: Yeah

    Cabbie: Good luck man

    Mike McDermott: [Narrating] people insist on calling it "luck"

    Mike McDermott: [to the cabbie] thanks

  • Mike McDermott: [after waiting for her outside the City Law University building] hey

    Jo: You look like hell

    Mike McDermott: Yeah well, you should've seen me yesterday

    Jo: You ok?

    Mike McDermott: Yeah I'm ok you?

    Jo: You know how I am

    Jo: [while seeing the last of his belongings packed up in a duffel bag] so, you're out of here huh?

    Mike McDermott: Yeah I figure there's nothing left for me here

    Mike McDermott: [while reaching inside his coat pocket for the money he owes him, then handing it to her] listen, could you give this to Petrovsky? I didn't want to wake him up: it's still a little early, can I count on you to do that?

    Jo: You can always count on me, Mike

    Mike McDermott: Thanks, take care Jo

    Jo: [Jokingly] Hey call me, if you need a lawyer

    Mike McDermott: [Jokingly] I will and I will

  • Mike McDermott: [In a bar] hey, I've been looking all over for you

    Jo: I didn't want to be found. You know Petrovsky waited and waited: so did the rest of the group

    Mike McDermott: Look, I missed one meeting

    Jo: It's not about the meeting. I don't care about the meeting

Rounders

Director: John Dahl

Language: English,Hebrew,Russian Release date: September 11, 1998