RED 2 Quotes

Frank: What are we doing?

Sarah: Let's face it, Columbo, things were getting a little stale.

Marvin: Wow. Mommy just slapped Daddy at the dinner table.

Sarah: Where did you get the bodies?

Victoria: My freezer.

Frank: Look, I'm retired, okay. I'm happy. *We* are happy.

Marvin: Frank... Frank... You haven't killed anybody in months.

Frank: That is not a bad thing, okay? That's a positive thing for a lot of people.

The Frog: You think I'm just going to roll over for you hegemonic Mickey Mouse-loving...

[Marvin hits him hard in the stomach]

The Frog: [finishes breathlessly] ... Americans?

Marvin: Leave Mickey out of it.

Frank: What are you doing kissing *this* guy?

Sarah: Well, I didn't wanna kill him.

Frank: Well, what kinda stupid logic is that?

[first lines]

Frank: Baby, check this out. Huh, a power washer? We need one of these.

Sarah: Yeah.

Frank: On the patio in the back yard.

Sarah: Yeah.

Frank: Should we go look at those window treatments?

Sarah: No.

Frank: Do you want one of those hotdogs? They're very good.

Sarah: Baby, you are a heck of a homemaker. You know that? But, um, we, you know, we could just go to dinner. Or...

Frank: Well, you know, if you don't make it...

Frank, Sarah: [together] ... you don't eat it.

Frank: You know what? That-That's a great idea. What if I make you dinner? I'm gonna go and get that, uh, grill. The big shiny one. Will you get us some shrimp? The big jumbo kind. Four down. Three over. Come back and find me down here. In tools.

Jack Horton: Hi, there. Um, my client, Frank Moses, is here. He's an American citizen being detained illegally and without due process. You know what? That is a lovely blazer.

Kelly: Thank you.

Frank: You gave her a gun?

Marvin: It is America, Frank.

Sarah: Everyone else has a gun.

Frank: She has no idea what to do with this.

Sarah: I know exactly what to do with it.

[grabs gun back and accidentally fires]

Frank: You don't... give fire... to a kitten. Why don't you just give her some dynamite, Marvin?

[Frank walks away]

Sarah: No external safety on the Sig?

[Marvin shakes his head no, then turns and walks away]

The Frog: [sipping and swishing wine] Superb.

Al Said: Wine is wine. I want to buy American air defense protocols.

The Frog: Why is it terrorists never appreciate *Burgundy*?

[while Han is trying to kill them, Marvin lies down behind Frank in a spooning position]

Frank: Marvin?

Marvin: Yeah?

Frank: Is that a stick of dynamite in your pocket?

Marvin: Yeah, but I'm saving it for emergency.

Frank: Well, this is kind of an emergency, isn't it?

Sarah: Why does Han hate you so much?

Frank: Not enough hugs as a child.

MI6 Chief Security Officer: They say you're a legend around here. I've, um... I've never heard of you. Must have been a bit before my time.

Victoria: [escapes her handcuffs and takes him down] Well, you've heard of me now.

Marvin: [hands Sarah a gun and points to his own body] Two shots, here and here. Drag the body in there and repeat as necessary.

Sarah: No safety.

Marvin: No safety.

Ivan: [noticing her shoeless foot] Ah, there is nothing more sexy in the whole world than a beautiful woman with an incredible gun.

Victoria: [taking out soldiers with scoped rifle] You're such a romantic.

[cut to Frank freeing Marvin and Sarah than cut back to Ivan and Victoria]

Ivan: I love the way your toes curl right before you fire.

Victoria: Hopeless.

Ivan: [sniffs her boot] Oh!

Frank: Eleven million people are gonna lose their lives if you don't help me.

[tosses him the gun]

Han Cho Bai: [reluctantly tosses it back] All right. Let's go.

[pause]

Han Cho Bai: This doesn't mean I'm not going to kill you later.

Marvin: She has talents you and I will never have.

Frank: What talents?

Marvin: People like her.

Han Cho Bai: If she lives, this'll be good for your relationship. You're right.

Marvin: And if there's one thing I know, it's women and covert ops.

Frank: That's two things.

Han Cho Bai: No, grasshopper. It is not.

Han Cho Bai: Ready to kill this son of a bitch?

Victoria: Abso-bloody-lutely.

Han Cho Bai: You blew up my plane.

Sarah: Sorry.

Marvin: I was wrong? So we're not even gonna... die?

Frank: Not yet.

Han Cho Bai: I was actually starting to like you. I was even thinking about not killing you. This is what happens when you try to save the world.

Victoria: Han, Han, you can't put a price on these things.

Han Cho Bai: You owe me 30 mil for the plane. And 20 for not killing you. You're a dead man, Moses.

Frank: Thanks for your help. Really.

[starts walking away]

Sarah: You think he means it?

Frank: Nah, he's a nice guy.

Han Cho Bai: I mean it, Frank!

Frank: All right.

Victoria: [to Marvin] Ah, they're gonna be right as rain.

Marvin: [whispering] He made the run to emotional safety.

[last lines]

[Sarah starts shooting up a third-world bar]

Marvin: [wearing a fruit headpiece] Don't look at me. She's your girlfriend.

Frank: Oh. Come on.

Marvin: Frank is a very simple creature with very simple needs. Okay? It's killing... eating... sexting... eating... Killing, I guess.

Sarah: What's your point?

Marvin: I can't believe you kissed The Frog.

Sarah: Well, I've kissed a lotta frogs.

Frank: So, what was it you wanted to talk to me about?

Katja: I would like to believe that the U.S. didn't plant a weapon of mass-destruction in Moscow. But I don't. Why are you in Paris?

Marvin: We come every fall of Strike Season and for the weather.

Katja: Oh. Well, the U.S. seems to think you're nuclear terrorists. Russia wants complete access. You agree now or I'll hand you over to the U.S. government.

Sarah: [whispers to Marvin] Can't we just kill her?

The Frog: [after Sarah pleads for help and kisses The Frog] You, I'll help.

The Frog: [softly to Frank to get him out of the way so he can get a key for Sarah] Excuse me.

Sarah: Thank you.

Sarah: [looks at Katja after getting the key] And you can suck it.

Frank: Baby? Honey?

Sarah: Seriously? You hooked up with that?

The Frog: What... a woman.

Sarah: [slaps Frank repeatedly to see if he is still drugged] He's out.

Marvin: He might be awake.

Sarah: Oh, good. So he can feel it. Did you ever, ever in your entire *career* let yourself get drugged? You still like her! And now she has the key!

Marvin: Well, she-she doesn't have *the* key. She has *a* key.

Sarah: What?

Marvin: Well, I knew she would play him like a banjo at an Ozark hoedown. So I have the key.

Frank: [mutters] Water.

[Sarah slaps him again]

Marvin: [looks at the bomb] It's counting down, Frank.

Han Cho Bai: Shut it off. Right?

Marvin: Shut... Shut... Yeah. Wi-With what? Acupressure?

Han Cho Bai: I don't know.

Marvin: Well, why is it my responsibility?

Han Cho Bai: Just do something.

Marvin: With my Mr. Chemistry set? I don't know what I'm doing. You want me to push a button?

Frank: We didn't come to Paris on vacation.

Sarah: Oh. Well, shopping's what I thought you did in Paris with your boyfriend's money while you're waiting for him to wake up from being taken down by his skanky, slutty, Russian biatch ex-girlfriend. So, thanks. Thanks. Thanks for the compliment for the fur. For telling me that I look nice in my dress. And it makes me feel really good and it makes me feel very loving towards you also.

Frank: [to Marvin as Sarah drives off] Why is she doing this to me?

Han Cho Bai: WHERE'S

[pause]

Han Cho Bai: MY

[pause]

Han Cho Bai: PLANE!

Marvin: MARVIN to Frank: If there's one thing I know, it's women and covert ops.

Frank: FRANK to Marvin: That's two things.

Han Cho Bai: HAN to Frank, after a meaningful pause: No, grasshopper. It is not.