Pom Poko Quotes

Osho: [Osho is patiently teaching a class to the young raccoons] A raccoon fell out of the tree! Yes, that's right. Who can tell me *why* the raccoon fell out of the tree? Gonta?

Gonta: He was a loser. *I* wouldn't have fallen.

Osho: Good answer.

Bunta: So what has been happening to our forest? It's only been three years. I feel like Rip Van Winkle.

Shokichi: We did everything we could to try to stop it.

Bunta: Every inch of the woods has changed. How could the land be so transformed?

Tamasaburô: We're so sorry. This must come as quite a shock.

Bunta: So the humans did it themselves?

Kiyo: [crying] That's right. They transformed all of Tama Hills.

Bunta: But how? Only raccoons should be able to do that. We're the only ones!

[He rushes off and shouts at the city]

Bunta: Who do you think you are, you stupid humans? Raccoons are the ones who transform things. How can you do this? How can you do this?

[He sinks to his knees and beats the ground]

Bunta: The only way this makes sense is if all you humans are raccoons! You're all stupid, evil, selfish raccoons!

[He sobs and howls]

Gonta: You see? Talk is useless!

Seizaemon: But if we become terrorists, that will just incite the humans to wipe us out!

Gonta: What good did it do? You idiots. You think that will stop the developers? Don't just frighten them. We need to hurt them. Inflict some serious pain!

[He makes an emphatic gesture with his arm. He stops and winces, then doubles over in pain]

Tanuki: [singing and carrying Gonta] Moon, moon, moon shine bright, moon shine bright, so bright and long/ Shine, shine, shine on Gonta, pom poko pom pom, pom pom pom/

Osho, Oroku: [singing] You showed the world what we can do, now

Front crowd of Tanuki: [chanting] We have the greatness of Oroku, too!

Tanuki: [singing] All our friends are cheering for you/ That's the truth, we adore you/ Hail to Gonta, he's our god!/ Pom poko, pom pom, pom pom pom!

Newsreader: [as the Tanuki chant Gonta's name in the background] ... Nevertheless, a government spokesman stressed that the people of Tokyo are in such desperate need of living accomodations, that the new Tama development project will not be delayed, despite today's tragic accidents.

[the tanuki stop celebrating and drop Gonta in surprise. They rush towards the TV, trampling Gonta in the process]

Newsreader: I repeat...

Narrator: It was, needless to say, an unfortunate accident. Gonta, the mastermind behind the dangerous attacks against the humans, now suffered multiple fractures and internal injuries, that would take nearly a year to heal.

Ponkichi: If we get rid of all the humans, that means... we'll never eat tempura again! Or beef jerky! Or popcorn.

Tanuki: Hamburgers! Donuts! Potato chips! Pepperoni pizza! Chicken wings!

[Gonta is moved by this. His eyes tear and his mouth waters]

Gonta: I can taste it!

Seizaemon: So, then, do you think it would be alright if we kept a few humans around, Gonta?

Gonta: [wiping the saliva from his mouth] We have no choice.

Shokichi: Master, would you re-enact the tale of the young samurai who shot the fan?

Hage: Ah. I'll need some help.

[He transforms into Nasu no Yoichi. He flies towards the crowd. Gonta's eyes bulge as he realizes that Master Hage is homing in on him. The crowd of tanuki scramble. Master Hage lands on Gonta and clings to his back. The Taka tanuki struggles, then hops around on all fours and turns into a horse. Hage rides around the clearing. Water seems to flood into the clearing, and Master Hage rides Gonta into it. Before them is an image of the sea, and three boats. One of the boats has the image of a woman standing on the bow of the boat and a fan on the top of the mast. Hage draws a bow and shoots the fan, sending it flying into the air]

Oroku: Lesser forms of transformation, such as changing color, can be achieved by chameleons, for example. But the true art of transforming can only be practiced by foxes, raccoons and a few cats.

[the lesson is interrupted by the loud snoring of Gonta, who is sitting in the front row]

Oroku: Gonta!

[Gonta wakes with a start and sits upright, assuming the clothes of a police officer]

Oroku: The fact that you were able to change your appearance like that means you've already mastered the rudimentary techniques of transformation.

Koharu: Tamasaburou, I beg you, don't go back to Tama Hills with the transformation masters. The thought of you being so far away from me and the children... I can't stand it! It breaks my heart!

[Crying, she changes into her anthropomorphic tanuki form and embraces her children]

Tamasaburô: My darling, I wish that we too could stay together forever. But you must understand.

Koharu: No, I don't understand. Why can't you stay here with me? The masters can make it to Tama without you. I'll talk to Father and the elders. Why don't you stay behind and be Father's successor?

[Tamasaburou looks off to the side]

Ponkichi: Are you going to put a leaf on your head?

Fireball Oroku: That's for beginners!

Narrator: Some raccoons sold real estate, and, unable to resist the money they could make, promoted leveling even more forests.

[Seizaemon, in human form, is shown on the phone]

Seizaemon: I've got a prime piece of forest just waiting to be developed!

Kiyo: So, what about the hunter song?

Shokichi: Oh. My dad used to sing it to me, when I was just a cub.

Kiyo: Sounds like your father was kind of strange.

Shokichi: M-hm. He'd sing, "Fried 'em up and ate 'em" really loudly. And then he'd give me a lecture.

Kiyo: About what?

Shokichi: He'd say, "Did you hear that, son? Even in children's nursery rhymes, humans sing about how they love to shoot us, and then fry us up. Humans are sick, cruel, heartless beasts, and don't you forget it, Shoukichi."

Seizaemon: All pray!

[the tanuki put their hands together and bow]

Osho: I'd like to say a prayer for the victims of this operation.

[At this point, some of the tanuki start to snigger]

Osho: We wish that we could save our forest without harming any humans. That was never our intention, but our forest is near and dear to us, and we...

[the tanuki all burst into raucous laughter and head for the exit]

Tamasaburô, Bunta, Tanuki: [singing] Let's turn into every sacred icon we can think of. Some are this and some are that...

[They do backflips into the air and turn into various items; stone Buddhas, lucky cats, painted eggs, kitsune sculptures, gold carp sculptures, monkey sculptures and Tanuki sculptures. Ponkichi rushes to join in and tries copying them. He does various poses but is unable to transform]

Shokichi: [narrating] Back then, all I thought about was transforming. I never dreamed that my friend Ponkichi might just want to be a normal raccoon.

Gonta: [as his attempted coup d'etat and call to action devolves into a random conversation about how best to cook a mouse] WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH ALL OF YOU? I say...

[He changes into his ultra simplified form and sings]

Gonta: A mouse tempura is the best one, yes it is!

Oroku: See, Gonta? We can't fight. All we can think about is food. I think it's best if we wait for the transformation masters to get here.

Gonta: [in a gruffly rueful tone] Sorry about that.

Shokichi: As soon as it's springtime, everybody goes crazy. All of a sudden they want to get married and have families. Nobody seems to remember Oroku's warning that we're not supposed to have any cubs. The second the sun hits their fur, they fall in love.

[He and Kiyo gaze into each other's eyes]

Shokichi: But not us. You don't see us chasing after each other like we're lunatics. We can handle not getting married and not having cubs, don't you think?

Kiyo: Of course we can. I'm so pleased. It's just what I'd hoped you'd say. You're... wonderful.

[She embraces Shokichi passionately]

Shokichi: Yeah. We can hold off. I don't need to kiss, or cuddle, or rub noses or...

Kiyo: [eyes burning with desire] Oh, Shokichi.

[She kisses him. She leans into Shokichi, then he leans into her]

Narrator: That was a mistake.

Seizaemon: You've brought hope back to this old heart of mine. Well done, son. Well done.

[Gonta finishes his can of beer]

Gonta: [smirking] Well done? We're not done. That was just practice.

Narrator: One day, an urgent report interrupted Gonta's training at headquarters. He hurried home to the Takaga Woods to face tragedy.

[Gonta arrives at the edge of a hill, and is greeted by the sight of miles of barren wasteland, with only a bulldozer and an excavator sitting where the woods had been]

Narrator: More than half his childhood home had already been ravaged by destruction.

[Gonta stares in horror. He lets out a howl of despair]

Narrator: Gonta went mad with grief.

First Drunk: I used to see stuff like that, too, when I was a kid. You know, monsters in the closet, that kind of thing.

Second Drunk: When you're young, it seems sur... surreal. I swore I saw these ghosts... dancing on my ceiling.

First Drunk: D'ahh, have another drink. You'll see them again.

[the two laugh]

Second Drunk: Isn't that weird? Now, why do you think you see that?

First Drunk: Do you think ghosts really exist?

Second Drunk: Huh? Don't be stupid. It's your brain playing tricks.

First Drunk: It must be... your brain plays tricks on you when you're young. Things like the boogeyman and monsters in the closet. They're all in your head. Because of... all the scary stories people tell you as a kid. It plants the seeds in your brain. So as a kid, you think it's real.

[the second drunk laughs]

Second Drunk: Kids are suckers. Because, there's no way those ghost stories are real. Still, they frighten you half to death. Yep. The brain is scary that way. You think things, and then you see them, if they're real or not. Your ima...

[He slowly turns around and sees a throng of strange creatures running across the sky]

Second Drunk: ... Agination...

[Shocked, he gets up from his seat and stares at the sky]

Second Drunk: There really are monsters out there.

First Drunk: [not noticing the monster parade] See? We talk about ghosts and then you start to see 'em.

Oroku: The forests of Tama Hills are our home. So you can't keep destroying them all! This plea is from every living creature in the forest.

[She glares at the reporter, then shapeshifts into a bear]

Tamasaburô: Master Kincho! My fervent desire is to accompany you back to Matsushima, and devote myself to training.

Kinchô Daimyôjin the Sixth: Is that so, Tamasaburou?

Tamasaburô: Yes.

Kinchô Daimyôjin the Sixth: You're prepared to become my successor?

Tamasaburô: Yes, Master Kincho.

Kinchô Daimyôjin the Sixth: I've been waiting for those words. But you're not selfishly abandoning your fellows to get back to Koharu, are you?

Tamasaburô: Of course not, Master Kincho.

[His eyes fill with tears]

Tamasaburô: Only...

Kinchô Daimyôjin the Sixth: Only what?

Tamasaburô: Even Master Kincho has lost support of the other tanuki. What purpose would it serve to stay here?

Kinchô Daimyôjin the Sixth: I think there's something we can do about that.