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Mike Martingano: [dressed as a police officer] Good evening. You live here?
Kim: Yeah.
Mike Martingano: Yeah? What's your name?
Kim: Kim.
Mike Martingano: Kim, can you move back for me, please?
[enters house full of women]
Mike Martingano: We keep getting complaints about noise and underage drinking. Everybody sit down, we're gonna be here for a while! You don't have anything sharp on you that I can stick myself with, do you?
Kim: No.
Mike Martingano: Good. 'Cause I do!
Mike Martingano: [rips off pants, women scream]
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Dallas: Will you welcome to the stage, the one, the only... Magic Mike!
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Dallas: [to The Kid] You are the husband they never had! You are that dreamboat guy that never came along!
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Mike Martingano: Entrepreneur/stripper? Stripper/entrepreneur?
Mike Martingano: Either one.
Mike Martingano: I was hoping this was all a joke.
Mike Martingano: It is pretty funny.
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Dallas: Fact is, the law says you cannot touch!
[smiles]
Dallas: But I think I see a lotta lawbreakers up in this house tonight...
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Mike Martingano: I have, like, $13,000 saved.
Mike Martingano: Wow. That's a lot of ones.
Mike Martingano: There are some fives in there.
Mike Martingano: Oh, ok. No twenties?
Mike Martingano: Oh, you don't wanna know what I have to do for twenties.
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Mike Martingano: [from trailer]
Mike Martingano: So you gonna come to the show tonight?
Mike Martingano: No.
Mike Martingano: You're gonna come to the show tonight.
Mike Martingano: No!
Mike Martingano: You just said over there that you like the show!
Mike Martingano: That doesn't mean I'm gonna go again!
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The Kid: [from trailer] Are you hitting on my sister?
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Mike Martingano: How pregnant did you get that girl's mouth last night?
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The Kid: You're a fucking stripper?
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Dallas: He's young, good looking...
[about The Kid]
Mike Martingano: He can't dance for sure.
Dallas: He can't dance for shit, but that is teachable.
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Joanna: I don't normally like blondes, I know, but she's really cute.
Mike Martingano: Yeah, but she's not going to be like you know, our type. You know what I'm saying?
Joanna: So, you're not into her?
Mike Martingano: No,no, that's not what I'm saying, she's like, she's a little uptight.
Joanna: OK, well we're fucking her, not taking her to dinner.
Mike Martingano: That's not going to happen. She's a dinner type is what I'm trying to say, if you get me.
Joanna: Oh, OK, um, if you decide you want to share... If you change your mind and put some effort into it, you know my number. And besides you know how much I love to eat.
Magic Mike Quotes
Extended Reading
