-
Fifi: They say people don't believe in heroes anymore. Well damn them! You and me, Max, we're gonna give them back their heroes!
Max: Ah, Fif. Do you really expect me to go for that crap?
Fifi: You gotta admit I sounded good there for a minute, huh?
-
[Max hands Fifi his letter of resignation]
Fifi: What's this?
Max: I'm through.
Fifi: Again?
Max: No, not again. I'm through. I'm quitting.
Fifi: Sit down.
Max: I didn't come here to dicuss it, I came here to say it. I'm through.
Fifi: Now just a minute! Alright, so the Goose bought it, but that's the way he always came in the world...
Max: -Off beat!
-
Max: I'm scared, Fif. You know why? It's that rat circus out there. I'm beginning to enjoy it.
Fifi: What is this, funny week?
Max: Look. Any longer out on that road and I'm one of them, you know? A terminal crazy... only I got a bronze badge to say I'm one of the good guys.
-
Roop: That scag and his floozie, they're gonna die!
-
[the Kid is handcuffed to a car that's about to explode]
Max: The chain in those handcuffs is high-tensile steel. It'd take you ten minutes to hack through it with this. Now, if you're lucky, you could hack through your ankle in five minutes. Go.
[the hacksaw is dropped next to The Kid, and Max limps off]
-
Bubba Zanetti: We're here to meet a friend. Comin' on the train.
Station Master: Nothin' comin' on the train except a couple of crates and a, uh, coffin!
Bubba Zanetti: Our friend.
-
Station Master: That must be your friend over there. They didn't leave much of him.
Bubba Zanetti: Must've cut his heart out, eh?
Station Master: Yes. That's what I meant. Poor bastard!
Toecutter: [whirls on the Station Manager] The Nightrider. That is his name... the Nightrider.
Station Master: [frightened] The Nightrider.
Toecutter: Remember him when you look at the night sky!
Station Master: I will.
Toecutter: Take your hat off.
Station Master: Anything you say.
Toecutter: Anything I say. What a wonderful philosophy you have. Take him away.
-
Toecutter: That there is Cundalini... and Cundalini wants his hand back!
-
Grease Rat: Like the sign says, "speed's just a question of money. How fast you wanna go?"
-
Goose: You've seen it!... You've heard it!... and you're still asking questions?
-
Kid Outside Halls of Justice: [a car that the bikers demolished earlier has been towed to the Halls of Justice]
Kid Outside Halls of Justice: Hey Mister! What happened to the car?
Bubba Zanetti: What do you think happened?
Kid Outside Halls of Justice: Looked like it was chewed up and spat out.
Bubba Zanetti: Perhaps it's the result of an anxiety.
-
Ziggy: [about Cundalini's hand] I figure it's lost property. If no one makes a claim to it, I say we can forget it.
-
Goose: [describing the supercharged Interceptor that's idling, in particular the supercharger itself] You can shut the gate on this one, Maxie... it's the duck's guts!
Barry, MFP Garage Mechanic: [excitedly] She sucks nitro... with Phase 4 heads! 600 horsepower through the wheels! She's meanness set to music and the bitch is born to run!
Goose: [looking at Max just staring at the engine] He's in a coma, man!
-
[after Roop and Charlie crash into a bystander's van]
Charlie: Boy, we're really going to get it this time. He had his indicator on.
Roop: Shut up!
-
Johnny the Boy: Whacked right out of his skull man! He ain't never comin' back!
-
Goose: We'll See you on the road, skag! We'll See you on the road like we saw The Nightrider!
Johnny the Boy: We remember The Nightrider! And we know who you are!
-
Goose: What a turkey! Hey, fella! You're a turkey!
-
Goose: It was like slow motion. He leaves his seat and goes through the windshield, headfirst straight into the tree, right? And then bounces back through the windshield. And by the time we got to him, he was just sitting there, trying to scream with his face ripped off.
[pause]
Goose: What's the matter?
Restaurant Patron: Not hungry anymore.
Goose: Give it here.
-
[last lines]
Johnny the Boy: [Max limps away after handcuffing Johnny to the car, leaking gas next to a fire] You're *mad*, man! You think I look silly, don't ya? Ha, ha! Don't bring this on me, man!
[sobbing]
Johnny the Boy: Don't do this to me, please! Aw, Sweet Jesus! I was sick! Don't bring this on me, please!
-
Max: I just can't get it clear in my head, Jess. He was so full of living, you know? He ran a franchise on it. Now there's nothing. And here I am trying to put sense to it, when I know there isn't any.
-
Goose: [via radio] Max.
Max: [via radio] Go ahead.
Goose: We are 100% SNAFU.
Max: You ok?
Goose: Nothin' a year in the tropics wouldn't fix.
Max: Much damage?
Nightrider: [via radio] You should see the damage, bronze. Huh? metal damage, brain damage. Heheheh. Are you listening, bronze? I am the Nightrider. I'm a fuel injected suicide machine. I am a rocker, I am a roller, I am a out-of-controller! I'm the Nightrider, baby!
[unintelligible]
Nightrider: ... and we ain't never comin' back!
-
Nightrider: The Toecutter - he knows who I am. I am the Nightrider! I am the chosen one. The mighty hand of vengeance, sent down to strike the unroadworthy! I'm hotter than a rollin' dice. Step right up, chum, and watch the kid lay down a rubber road, right to FREEDOM!
-
Max: [to old woman] I think we've got some hoon trouble...
-
Goose: Jimmy the Goose, larger than life and twice as ugly!
-
Roop: Main force Patrol.
Roop: Were out of the game unable to continue pursuit.
Roop: You better send a Meat Truck. Charlie's copped a saucepan in the throat.
-
[Cundalini and Mudguts molest a female mannequin]
Bubba Zanetti: [to Toecutter] Joviality is a game of children.
[Toecutter fires shotgun into the air]
Toecutter: Mudguts, get out of there. Cundalini, put her against the post.
[indicating mannequin]
Toecutter: We have a problem here. She... is not... what she seems. Bubba Zanetti has it on good authority. She's sent by the bronze. Full of treachery. The bronze... take our pride.
[Bubba takes aim at the mannequin with a pistol. Suddenly Johnny grabs the Toecutter's shotgun and blasts her]
Johnny the Boy: [kneeling in front] If you're going to waste the bronze, you gotta do it big!
Bubba Zanetti: You just don't have the style, do ya. Chickenshit.
-
[the gang is holding Sprog]
Jessie: [pleading] Please. Give me my baby.
Toecutter: [feigning concern] Jessie, Jessie, Jessie. You've not got a sense of humor.
[whispering]
Toecutter: You've got a pretty face, though. Awful pretty. Awful pretty.
[brightly]
Toecutter: I suppose you don't need a sense of humor with a pretty face. The only trouble is though, Missy, if you should...
[wiping his face roughly with his hand, then whispering]
Toecutter: ... lose the face...
Jessie: Please don't hurt my baby.
Toecutter: ...you've got NOTHING.
Jessie: What do you WANT from me?
Toecutter: Don't change the subject.
-
Fifi: People don't believe in heroes anymore.
Labatouche: I know McCaffee, you want to give them back their heroes. You will not try this one on me again, I do not enjoy wasting money. Goodbye and good luck.
Fifi: Thanks Labatouche, you're a real human being.
-
Starbuck: [watching Jessie get out of her car with Sprog] Look what's turned up for Sunday dinner.
Mudguts: Main course and dessert!
Starbuck: And my favorite kind... female!
-
Mudguts: [as Toecutter is harassing Jessie] Watch the tongue, lovable, I've seen him lick his own eyebrow clean!
-
Grease Rat: [Max returns to the garage to question Greast Rat about the Toecutter and his gang] Bubba Zanetti, is that? You come for the grunt? She won't be ready until this afternoon. Still having trouble with the front forks. They're mongrels to work with.
[Max pulls Grease Rat out from under the car]
Grease Rat: You asshole! What the moly fuck you think you're doing?
Max: You and me are gonna talk about the Toecutter.
Grease Rat: Never heard of him
[Max pushes Grease Rat back under the car, hitting his head]
Grease Rat: What the Christ are you?
Max: I wanna know about the tattoo.
Grease Rat: I mind my own business, don't I? I mean, they'll kill me, won't they?
[Max turns a lever and the car collapses on Grease Rat crushing him. Max turns the lever and raises the car and pulls Grease Rat out from under the car. Grease Rat coughs. Max grabs him]
Max: I'll say the names, and you say "yes" or "no". Nightrider...
[Grease Rat nods his head]
Max: Toecutter, Bubba Zanetti.
Grease Rat: Yes
Max: There's more?
Grease Rat: Johnny.
Max: Johnny the boy?
Grease Rat: Yeah. Some others.
Max: Where?
Grease Rat: Out at the beaches, looking for fuel.
Max: Are they coming back?
Grease Rat: I don't know. They gotta get their bikes. For Christ's Sake! I don't know.
-
Charlie: We're still mobile.
Roop: For Christ's sake, shove over!
Charlie: You're blaspheming again. I don't have to work with a blasphemer.
-
Fifi: That Code you ran down a few days ago.
Max: The Nightrider?
Fifi: The Nightrider, yeah. Got a problem.
Max: What's that?
Fifi: His friends. Word is they're out to get you.
Max: Scoot jockeys?
Fifi: Yeah, nomad trash.
Max: Well, I'll add it to my threat collection.
Fifi: Good boy, Max. You're a good boy.
-
Nightrider: Born with a steering wheel in his hand and lead in his foot. He is the Nightrider cruising at the speed of fright! This is the Nightrider, and we ain't never coming back! I'm a fuel-injected suicide machine! I am a rocker! I am a roller! I am the out-of-controller! I am the Nightrider!
-
Toecutter: Bubba. Johnny.
[huffs]
-
Bubba Zanetti: Johnny the Boy has done it again. This time it's a scrubber. He's never gonna learn.
Toecutter: But we are going to teach him, Bubba. You are going back for him.
Bubba Zanetti: No way! Not me, not for him!
Toecutter: But it's not for him. It's for me, Bubba.
[whistles]
-
Goose: Hey, Midge, don't write off the Goose until you see the box going into the hole.
-
Toecutter: [to Johnny the Boy] The Bronze, they keep you from being proud.
-
Junior Doctor: What do you reckon?
[about Jessie's condition]
Senior Doctor: I'm a doctor, not a fortuneteller.
Mad Max Quotes
Extended Reading
