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Mr. Eddy: [to a tailgater after running him off the road] Don't tailgate! Don't you fucking ever tailgate! Do you know how much space is needed to stop a car traveling at 35 miles per hour? Six car lengths! Six fuckin' car lengths! That's a hundred and six fuckin' feet, mister! If I had to stop suddenly, you woulda hit me! I want you to get a fuckin' driver's manual, and I want you to study that motherfucker! And I want you to obey the the goddamn rules of the road! Fifty-fuckin' thousand people were killed on the highways last year 'cause of fuckin' assholes like you! Tell me you're gonna get a manual!
-
Mystery Man: We've met before, haven't we.
Fred Madison: I don't think so. Where was it you think we met?
Mystery Man: At your house. Don't you remember?
Fred Madison: No. No, I don't. Are you sure?
Mystery Man: Of course. As a matter of fact, I'm there right now.
Fred Madison: What do you mean? You're where right now?
Mystery Man: At your house.
Fred Madison: That's fucking crazy, man.
Mystery Man: Call me. Dial your number. Go ahead.
-
[repeated line]
Mystery Man: We've met before, haven't we?
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Ed: You're a musician?
Fred Madison: Yeah.
Al: What's your axe?
Fred Madison: Tenor. Tenor saxophone. Do you...
Al: [shakes his head and point at his ear] Tone deaf.
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Ed: Do you own a video camera?
Renee Madison: No. Fred hates them.
Fred Madison: I like to remember things my own way.
Ed: What do you mean by that?
Fred Madison: How I remembered them. Not necessarily the way they happened.
-
Fred Madison: Andy, who is that guy?
Andy: I don't know his name. He's a friend of Dick Laurent's, I think.
Fred Madison: Dick Laurent?
Andy: Yeah, I believe so.
Fred Madison: But Dick Laurent is dead, isn't he?
-
Fred Madison: Dick Laurent is dead...
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Fred Madison: Where's Alice?
Mystery Man: Alice who? Her name is Renee. If she's told you her name is Alice, she's lying.
[filled with rage]
Mystery Man: [shouts] And your name? What the fuck is your name?
-
Mr. Eddy: This is where mechanical excellence and one-thousand four-hundred horsepower pays off.
-
Ed: Fucker gets more pussy than a toilet seat.
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Lou: What a fucking job.
Hank: His or ours, Lou?
Lou: Ours, Hank.
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Fred Madison: Who the hell owns that dog?
-
Mystery Man: Call Me. Dial your number. Go ahead.
[Fred dials the number and the Mystery Man answers]
Mystery Man: [over the phone] I told you I was here.
Fred Madison: [amused] How'd you do that?
Mystery Man: Ask me.
[Fred's facial expression turns from amused to serious as he's clearly rembering the anonymous video tapes]
Fred Madison: [angrily into the phone] How did you get inside my house?
Mystery Man: [voice] You invited me. It is not my custom to go where I am not wanted.
Fred Madison: [into the phone] Who are you?
[Both Mystery Men laugh mechanically]
Mystery Man: [voice] Give me back my phone.
[Fred gives the cell phone back to the man in front of him]
Mystery Man: It's been a pleasure talking to you.
-
Mr. Eddy: [into the phone] I'm really glad to know you're doing okay. You're sure you're okay? Everything alright?
Pete Dayton: [into the phone] Yeah.
Mr. Eddy: [into the phone] I'm really glad to know you're doin good, Pete. Hey, I want you to talk to a friend of mine.
Mystery Man: [into the phone to Pete] We've met before, haven't we?
Pete Dayton: [into the phone] I don't think so. Where is it you think we've met?
Mystery Man: [into the phone] At your house. Don't you remember?
Pete Dayton: [into the phone] No. No, I don't.
Mystery Man: [into the phone] In the East, the Far East, when a person is sentenced to death, they're sent to a place where they can't escape, never knowing when an executioner may step up behind them, and fire a bullet into the back of their head.
Pete Dayton: [into the phone] What's going on?
Mystery Man: [into the phone] It's been a pleasure talking to you.
-
Pete Dayton: I want you.
Alice Wakefield: You'll never have me.
-
Fred Madison: I had a dream about you last night.
Renee Madison: Yeah? What was it about?
Fred Madison: You were in the house, calling my name, but I couldn't find you. Then there you were, lying in bed... but it wasn't you. It looked like you, but it wasn't.
-
Fred Madison: How did you meet that asshole Andy, anyway?
Renee Madison: It was a long time ago. I met him at this place called Moke's. We... became friends. He told me about a job...
Fred Madison: What job?
Renee Madison: [short pause] I don't remember. Anyway, Andy's okay.
Fred Madison: Yeah well, he's got some fucked-up friends.
-
Mr. Eddy: How you doin' Pete?
Pete Dayton: Okay.
Mr. Eddy: I'm sure you noticed that girl that was with me the other day, good lookin' blonde? She stayed in the car? Her name is Alice. I swear I love that girl to death. If I ever find out that somebody was making out with her, I'd take this...
[pulls out a .357 pistol]
Mr. Eddy: ...and shove it so far up his ass it would come out of his mouth. Then you know what I'd do?
Pete Dayton: What?
Mr. Eddy: I'd blow his fuckin' brains out.
[Mr. Eddy puts his gun away]
Mr. Eddy: Hey, you're looking good. What you been up to?
-
Guard Johnny Mack: Captain Luneau?
Captain Luneau: Yeah, Mack?
Guard Johnny Mack: Captain, this is some spooky shit we got here.
-
Guard Henry: Man, that wife killer looks pretty fucked up.
Guard Mike: Which one?
[both laugh]
-
Pete Dayton: Where the fuck are we going, Alice?
Alice Wakefield: We have to go to the desert, baby.
-
Al: Do you know what I think?
Ed: What is it? What is it that you think?
Al: There is no such thing as a bad coincidence.
-
[in Pete's vision of Alice]
Alice Wakefield: Did you want to talk to me? Did you want to ask me "WHY"?
-
Arnie: Pete! Where've you been? It's really good you're back! A lot of people are gonna be happy that you're back, including me!
Pete Dayton: Well, it's good to be back, Arnie.
Arnie: Mr. Smith is waiting for you.
Pete Dayton: Sure, I'll take care of him.
Arnie: And Mr. Eddy called every day asking about you. Can I call him and tell him to come in?
Pete Dayton: Sure, call him. Tell him to come in and I'm ready to work.
Arnie: You're ready to work?
Pete Dayton: I'm ready to work.
Arnie: [to the other garage employees] Pete is back!
-
[Pete, disturbed by the saxophone music on a radio, switches the channels]
Phil: What'd you change it for? I liked that.
Pete Dayton: Well, I don't!
Phil: I liked that.
-
Bill Dayton: The police called us today.
Pete Dayton: What'd they want?
Bill Dayton: They wanted to know if we had a chance to find out what happened to you the other night. And they wanted to know if you remembered anything.
Pete Dayton: But... I don't remember anything. What'd you tell them?
Bill Dayton: [after a long pause] We're not going to say anything about that night to the police.
Candace Dayton: We saw you that night, Pete.
Bill Dayton: You came home with your friend, Sheila.
Pete Dayton: Sheila?
Bill Dayton: Uh-huh. There was a man with you two.
Pete Dayton: What is this? Why didn't you tell me anything? Who was the man?
Bill Dayton: I've never seen him before in my life.
Pete Dayton: What happened to me? Please Dad, if you know, tell me.
[Bill and Candace sorrowfully look away from Pete]
-
[into a phone]
Arnie: There's nine people down here, and you can ask seven of them. If you can get that price from one of them, I'll let you ask the other two.
-
Mr. Eddy: Boy, that's smooth. Smooth as shit off a duck's ass!
-
Sheila: What do you want?
Pete Dayton: Wanna go for a drive?
Sheila: [coyly] I don't know.
Pete Dayton: Get in, baby.
-
David Bowie: [singing] Funny how secrets travel...
-
[laying on the ground with his throat slashed by Fred and the Mystery Man]
Mr. Eddy: [gagging from his bloody throat] What do you guys want?
[the Mystery Man pulls out a hand-held Watchman TV and gives it to Mr. Eddy who looks on it to see an interior of Andy's house at night with with Mr. Eddy and Renee watching a snuff-porno film while fondling each other beside the projector. The image suddenly changes back to Fred and the Mystery Man standing before him in the frame]
Mystery Man: Now you can hand it back.
Mr. Eddy: [as he hands the portable TV back] You and me, mister... we can really out-ugly them sonafabitches. Can't we?
-
Fred Madison: What are you going to do?
Renee Madison: Stay home. Read.
Fred Madison: Read? Read what?
-
Mr. Eddy: You and me, mister... We can really out-ugly them sum'bitches... Can't we?
-
Pete Dayton: Where did you meet these fucking people?
-
Pete Dayton: It excited you?
Lost Highway Quotes
Extended Reading