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Muriel Lang: You should be locked up in that looney bin on Staten Island that Geraldo Rivera is always exposing!
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Charlie Lang: Meatball! That's what I want!
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Yvonne Biasi: Who wants ice cream on their pie? Who wants pie?
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Charlie Lang: [about Muriel] It's like we're on two different channels now. I'm CNN and she's the Home Shopping Network.
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Charlie Lang: I told you I'd share my ticket. I never planned on sharing my heart. Maybe I could get lucky twice today.
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Yvonne Biasi: Because of me, you have nothing.
Charlie Lang: Because of you, I have you.
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Muriel Lang: You got the numbers wrong!
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Charlie Lang: Muriel was the first girl I ever...
[Implying she was the first person he ever had sex with]
Yvonne Biasi: Really?
Charlie Lang: Yeah.
Yvonne Biasi: [sincerely] That's sweet.
Charlie Lang: I guess. So we went down to the marriage license bureau, and I remember there was this other couple there. They were orthodox Jews. It was an arranged marriage. They weren't allowed to see each other. They were surrounded by their families, they couldn't get a glimpse of each other. I couldn't help but think, "they don't even know they're attached to each other, they don't even know if they've got anything to talk to about with each other." And here it is, ten years later. I bet they're happily married with six cute little kids, and Muriel and I have nothing to say to one another.
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Angel Dupree: [Narrating] Tonight, I had the opportunity to study grace and generosity under the direst of circumstances. Even in "their darkest hour", Officer Charlie Lang and the good-hearted Ms. Yvonne Biasi shared a bowl of soup with me. When I left, this good Samaritan gave me money from his own pocket, wishing it could be more.
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Angel Dupree: [Narrating] It took Charlie and Yvonne three days to open up all their mail, and when they were done New York had given them a six hundred thousand dollar tip, Charlie happily returned to the force. Yvonne got her coffee shop back. Eddie could only get work driving a cab. And Muriel, she married Jack Gross... who cleaned out the checking account and fled the country. Muriel lives in the Bronx with her mother and works at a nail salon. Charlie, Muriel and Yvonne all lived in a city where people prayed for miracles every day, and sometimes they happen.
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Muriel Lang: I mean, if he was on the take, at least I would say, "Okay. He has initiative."
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Muriel's Customer: My sister was married to a cop for ten years. It's a no-win situation. Either they're honest and you're broke, or they're crooks and they never come home.
Muriel Lang: So, your sister - what'd she do?
Muriel's Customer: She left the cop and married an electrician. That's your real money.
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Muriel Lang: One bedroom in Queens is not my idea of living.
Charlie Lang: One bedroom in Queens is fine. If we had kids... if we had kids, that'd be another story.
Muriel Lang: We don't have the money to have kids.
Charlie Lang: Of course we have the money to have kids. Cops have kids. Firemen have kids. If only rich people had kids, there wouldn't be public schools.
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Muriel Lang: Charlie, I'm so sick of it. Your niceness and your decency.
It Could Happen to You Quotes
Extended Reading
Director: Andrew Bergman
Language: English,Spanish Release date: July 29, 1994