House of D Quotes

Pappass: I'm not retarded anymore.

Tom Warshaw: Oh really?

Pappass: Really.

Tom Warshaw: When did that happen?

Pappass: Aww, 1984. Sometime in the spring. I went from retard to mentally handicapped. And then in 1987-88, I went from handicapped to challenged. I changed again. I'm probably changing right now, you know. Who knows what I'll be next?

Melissa: Your outfit is... um...

Tommy Warshaw: Orange?

Melissa: Really orange.

Mr. Pappass: You know why your mother died, son? She killed herself because she had a retarded son, isn't that right?

Tommy Warshaw: She got hit by a car.

Mr. Pappass: She walked in front of a car because she had a retarded son.

Tommy Warshaw: She was drunk.

Mr. Pappass: She was drunk because her son's retarded.

Tommy Warshaw: She was drunk because she was married to you, you loser.

Pappass: Do you ever miss your dad?

Tommy Warshaw: All the time.

Pappass: Want mine?

Tommy Warshaw: No thanks.

Katherine Warshaw: Go on. Run away just like your father.

Tommy Warshaw: He didn't run away, Mom. He died.

Tommy Warshaw: Hey! My mom says it's crazy in there! She says you've got rats, roaches... lesbianism...

Lady: [laughing] I guess I'm safe from that last one. I'm in solitary.

[first lines]

Tom Warshaw: [narrating] My name is Tom Warshaw. I'm an American artist living in Paris. I've lived here for 30 years with a secret nobody knows. My son, Odell, is turning 13 today. And for his birthday, I'm gonna tell him my secret.

Tom Warshaw: I'm gonna tell him, "You know how in old movies when the bad guys want to break into a safe? There's this one guy, the safecracker, who puts his ear up to the lock and listens as he dials the combination, listening for what they call in English, the tumblers. Because when the number is right, there's a click, and he knows with the click, he's breaking in. Well, in a man's life, there's a tumbler too. And I think that number is 13, when there's a click and a boy breaks into manhood. And the safe of his life open up and Shazam, there are all the riches of what a man can hope for and hope to be."

Tom Warshaw: What I want to say to my son is, the opposite thing happened for me when I turned 13. Instead of opening, the safe locked shut on me. Because of certain things that happened, I couldn't hear the tumblers anymore. Now that he's turning 13, I'm hearing the tumblers again. Maybe it's like we're becoming men together.

Pappass: No tittie. No tittie at all. I've seen lemons bigger.

Tommy Warshaw: Pappass!

Melissa: It's okay, I really don't care.

[sits down]

Tommy Warshaw: [sitting down too] Yeah, well, like, me neither. I have small balls, you know?

Melissa: [speechless]

Tommy Warshaw: But that's good, right?

Melissa: I don't know.

Pappass: [sitting down now] I have a huge penis.

Bernadette: [from jail cell above the street] You know why I'm in here, boy?

Tommy Warshaw: No.

Bernadette: I murdered my husband, in his sleep, with my bare hands. I'm a murderer! I *hate* men! And if they let me out this bitch, I'll kill again! I mean, if you get in my way, I might even kill you!

Tommy Warshaw: I don't care.

Bernadette: [from her apartment window] Tommy.

Tom Warshaw: [from the rainy courtyard] Lady. You have a beautiful face.

Bernadette: Tommy, we did what we had to do - didn't we?

Tom Warshaw: [just staring back]

Bernadette: It's alright. She understands. Your poor mama. She understands a boy have to go away before he come back. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Tom Warshaw: [breaks down in tears]

Bernadette: Run, Tommy.

Tom Warshaw: I don't have to run anymore. Lady, I can walk now.

Bernadette: I know you can walk. And I know you can dance. But I'm sayin' this is a bad neighborhood for a lone white boy. Now, run.

[mocks running with her arms]

Bernadette: Run! Run! Run, Tommy!

Tom Warshaw: [turns and goes]

Tom Warshaw: You forgive me, Pappass?

Pappass: Yeah.

[startled]

Pappass: For what? Look at you, Tom-ass.

Tom Warshaw: What?

Pappass: Look at you.

Tom Warshaw: Look at what, Papp-ass?

Pappass: You have the dad face now.

[pushing out an old man jaw]

Pappass: My dad died... a lot of sleeps ago. Cancer ate him, just your dad. Cancer is the crab on the horoscope. Crab dinner, "$6.95, all you can eat."

Tom Warshaw: Sorry, Pappass.

Pappass: It's okay, 'cause the crab ate all the hard parts first, the mean parts. The parts that hate me being retarded. Just before he died when he was only mostly dead, he was *so* nice. 'Cause only the soft parts were left. He was the nicest guy in the world. He hugged me, and he told me over and over, he loved me, he loved me, he loved me.

Tom Warshaw: Pappass...

[patting his knee]

Pappass: I hate seafood. You know, Tommy, sometimes I think the crab ate me while I was still in my mom's belly. I think it are all my smart parts. Do you think that's what happened, Tommy?

Tom Warshaw: No.

Pappass: No?

Tom Warshaw: I think you got plenty of smart parts, Pappass.

Pappass: Yeah.

Tommy Warshaw: [to pole] Hi! I'm Tommy. You're very tall.

[Lady laughs]

Tommy Warshaw: She just said she was Polish.

[laughs sarcastically]