Eraser Quotes

Sal: [referring to a sniper perched atop a crane] You think I can hit that guy from here?

Johnny C: Give it a rest, Sal. You couldn't hit the ground even if you fell on it.

Morehart: This is James Haggarty, our chief of security.

Robert: Hey, you ever done any wetwork?

James Haggerty: Only on three different continents.

Robert: Wow, really? Listen, you wanna impress me, slick? Do your fucking job!

John: Lee, this is Father Rodriguez.

Lee: How do you do?

Father Rodriguez: Of course, I wasn't always Father Rodriguez. You might say I was born again, with a little help from our friend here.

John: Some of his Colombian associates wanted to introduce him to God personally.

Father Rodriguez: I've been given a second chance at life. I'm using it to do God's work.

[the phone rings]

Undersecretary of Defense Daniel Harper: It's for you.

[takes the phone]

Robert: Yeah?

John: [over phone] You've just been erased.

[John parachutes into a junkyard]

John: Where is this?

Camille: Earth. Welcome.

Tony Two Toes: There they are. Commie bastards!

Mikey: They're not communists any more, Tony. They're a federation of independent liberated states.

Tony Two Toes: Don't make me hurt you, Mikey.

Calderon: Don't you ever get tired of babysitting scumbags?

John: Yeah, but in your case I'll make an exception.

Robert: Listen, have I given you an evaluation yet.

Deputy Monroe: Evaluation?

Robert: Yeah.

[shoots Monroe]

Robert: A-plus, kid.

[his hands are now bloody]

Robert: Ah man, can somebody get me a wet-nap or something?

Calderon: Hey, who does this guy think he is?

Robert: Who, him? Well, he thinks he's the best guy in the game. I think he's right. Try not to piss him off, okay?

John: I work alone. If anyone comes to you and claims that I sent them...

[reveals a gun]

John: Use this.

John: Don't move, you're dead.

[takes a photo]

[John knocks down a door and shoots a guy]

Lee: You're late!

John: Traffic.

John: Drop your gun.

Robert: What?

John: If you drop your gun now, I promise I won't kill you.

[explosions rock the building]

Sergei: It seems your friend has arrived.

Lee: I'll enjoy introducing him to you.

Robert: Turn this thing around.

Pilot: I've got a may-day, I'm trying to keep us in the air!

Robert: I said turn around and take him out now!

John: I work alone, you know that.

Robert: Not today.

[John wakes up from a drug-induced sleep]

Robert: Confused, pal? New York.

John: You're off course.

Robert: No, no we're not. You're gonna take us to her John.

[John reaches for his gun. Robert holds up his gun in a plastic bag]

Robert: You did a very, very bad thing, John. You killed Monroe. Now that makes you the mole.

John: No, that makes you a murderer.

Agent: This is Special Agent John Kruger. He'll be handling your personal security.

Lee: My protection?

John: New identity, relocation, I'll take you through it step by step.

Lee: What are you talking about? I'm not going anywhere!

John: You're in an extremely high risk situation, Miss Cullen. That should've been explained to you.

John: There's a major arms deal going down. A U.S. contractor is selling out to international terrorists.

[Tony and his whole crew start laughing]

Tony Two Toes: Mr. Sixty Minutes, tell me something I don't know.

John: It's going to happen tonight, on your docks.

Tony Two Toes: [stops laughing] *That* I didn't know.

[the limousine that Daniel Harper, Robert Deguerin, and Morehart were trapped in was just hit by a train]

Lee: What happened?

John: They caught a train.

Perimeter Guy: [on his walkie-talkie] Sir, I have a situation here.

Tony Two Toes: [to Dock Guard] You certainly do.

Nurse: Oh my God! Terrorists!

Johnny C: Terror? I'll show you some freakin' terror! Get your ass up here, I'll jump-start it!

[Johnny C is working as a bartender in a drag club. John comes to see him]

Johnny C: I got one question: was it your idea to hook me up with the Village People here?

John: Well, you're safe, aren't you?

Johnny C: Well, from the mob, yeah. I mean no self-respecting wiseguy would ever be caught dead in a joint like this. Only... do me one favor. Don't let it out that I'm straight, all right? I don't wanna break any hearts or nothing.

John: Trust me.

Tony Two Toes: [counting the union rep payee envelopes] Hey, Mikey. You're one payment short.

Mikey: Oh, that's Louis. He didn't pay.

Tony Two Toes: He didn't pay? Why?

Mikey: He needed a few extra days to come up with the money, so I told him it was okay.

Tony Two Toes: You going soft on me, Mikey? What exactly did he say?

Johnny C: He said, "Tell that fat fuck, Tony Two Toes, I ain't payin' another dime!"

Tony Two Toes: I know that voice... but it can't be him, unless he's a ghost.

Johnny C: [walks into room] Boo.

[after blowing up a building with John inside]

Robert: Okay, I think it's safe to say we got him.

Schiff: He's toast.

Calderon: I think we even got the roaches.

Robert: Hey, John? That was good work last night.

John: I had a good teacher.

Robert: Bullshit. You had the best.

Robert: Good morning, gentlemen.

Undersecretary of Defense Daniel Harper: Shut up! You mind telling me what the hell's going on?

Robert: I'll have the situation contained in 24 hours.

Undersecretary of Defense Daniel Harper: Not good enough! The shipment goes down tonight.

Robert: Everything is going as planned. But the first thing we've got to do is cancel that shipment.

Undersecretary of Defense Daniel Harper: And what do you propose we do with 10 tons of assault weaponry that's not supposed to exist?

Robert: I am the eyes and ears of your world, gentlemen, and I'm telling you, there's too much heat.

Undersecretary of Defense Daniel Harper: You don't get it. The money has already changed hands. These are not the type of people you cancel on!

Robert: Listen...

Undersecretary of Defense Daniel Harper: No, you listen! The disk, the girl, the guns. By dawn they don't exist. Are we clear?

Robert: Yes, sir. Crystal.

Johnny C: You want me to help you break into Cyrez?

John: Yeah.

Johnny C: What, are you shitting me? When you said you needed my help, I thought you wanted me to help you move a sofa or something.

John: Pull over, up ahead.

Johnny C: Alright, I'm gonna help you out here... All we are gonna need is some tanks, a couple of rocket launchers, and a set of balls like, uh... the King of Bayonne.

Sal: We heard you got whacked.

Johnny C: Yeah, must have been some other guy.

Tony Two Toes: Yeah? Was it some other guy who ratted out Vincenzo Canelli?

Johnny C: Hey, Canelli's a piece of shit.

Tony Two Toes: I got no love for Canelli, either. But you crossed the line, Johnny.

Johnny C: Hey, I'm still here.

Tony Two Toes: Nah, that don't matter. What you did was wrong, John.

John: [entering] No, what he did got a drug dealer and his poison off the streets.

Tony Two Toes: Whose da tree trunk?

[after killing the thugs sent to murder Johnny C, John arranges their bodies on the lawn of his house, shoots them with a silenced pistol, then puts the guns in their hands]

John: They killed you, then they turned on each other.

Johnny C: Right. Those sons of bitches...

Tony Two Toes: We're from the local 129th, sonny.

Mikey: We heard you was loading a ship without the assistance of bonefide union labor. Say it ain't so.

Hostage Taker: [while holding a woman at gunpoint] You're early.

Robert: You're late.

[shoots the suspect]

John: That weapon, it came from your company, right?

Lee: Yes. It's an EMP prototype, it's not even supposed to exist.

John: EMP?

Lee: Electro-Magnetic Pulse. No gunpowder, no conventional bullets. They fire caseless aluminum shells at nearly the speed of light.

John: You're talking about the rail gun?

Lee: [surprised] That's right.

John: The Navy has been working on those for years. But the smallest one I've ever seen is mounted on a battleship.

Lee: Cyrez was contracted to scale them down, design a man-portable version. The most powerful assault rifle on earth. They took millions, then said the physics were impossible.

John: It looked real enough to me.

Lee: [On the computer on Donahue's office] How are we doing ?

John: You were right about Donahue, he left himself a back door. But we've still got to break his code.I'd figure we've that we have about five or six minutes until they trace us.

[scrolling through the records]

John: Do you recognize any of this?

Lee: No. But, we're getting warm, it's an accounting format.

John: Okay, stop me if I get lucky.

Lee: Now those are offshore banking deposits here it is UBS, that's United Bank of Syria.

John: $52 million? If it's an arms sale, it's a major one. Let's see who their buyer is.

Lee: Sergei Ivanovich Petrofsky ? Who's that?

John: [sighs] Bad news. He runs a cartel in the Russian mafia, selling drugs, guns, and influence to some very unpleasant people.

[Scrolls lower]

John: There it is, delivery date. Tonight, midnight? A thousand units at Baltimore Harbor.

Lee: Thousand units of what?

[Screen reveals the item]

Lee: An EM gun.

John: A *thousand* EM guns.

Lee: Are they insane? If these things get offshore...

John: There'll be a whole new era of world terrorism.

John: Do you remember when you told me that if I ever needed anything, I could come to you?

Johnny C: Yes.

John: Well, I need your help.

Johnny C: Wait, you want my help?

John: Yes... right now.

Johnny C: You got it!

[to the bartender]

Johnny C: Evan! Look, cover me at the bar for a few seconds. I gotta go home and help out a friend here.

Evan the Bartender: [looking at John] Who is he? He looks rough!

Johnny C: Please, don't start. It's not what you think.

John: I'm sorry, do you two need a moment alone?

Johnny C: We're fine, thanks.

John: Just an idea.

Johnny C: Evan here just... worries about me. He and I...

[John smirks at Johnny insinuating what it means]

Johnny C: Don't ask!

Robert: Think about it John! You jump, you go through there like shit through a goose!

John: You're right!

[Rips out a seat, throws it out the exit where its sucked into an engine and explodes]