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Charles Bronson: [Bronson getting paid after his first fight] 20 quid? You're having a fucking laugh, ain't cha?
Paul: Oh spare me the Oliver Twist routine, Charlie love. You need to build your audience.
Charles Bronson: I gave you fucking magic in there!
Paul: Magic? You just pissed on a gypsy in the middle of fucking nowhere. Hardly the hottest ticket in town, darling
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Charles Bronson: [Real Life Charles Bronson Quote] How would you feel, waking up in the morning without a window? My window is a steel grid, I 'ave to put my lips against that steel grid and suck in air, that's my morning... 'cause I got no air in my cell. I have to eat, sleep and crap in that room twenty-three hours of a twenty-four hour day. You tell me, what human being deserves that? Apart from the stinking paedophile or a child killer. I don't deserve that, I done nothing on this planet to deserve that. My bed is four inches off the floor, it's a concrete bed, my toilet hasn't even got a seat on it or a lid, and I 'ave to live like this month after month after month, and the way it's looking it's year after year after year. Now is that's right then so be, but let somebody else 'ave a fucking go at it, 'cause I've had twenty-six years of this bollocks and it's time to come out, and I want the jury at my trail to come and see how I'm living. But I'm not living, I'm existing.
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Paul: All you need is a name.
Charles Bronson: What's wrong with Mickey Peterson.
Paul: You need a fighting name, like a movie star.
Charles Bronson: Charlton Heston.
Paul: Look, love. No one gives a toss about Charlton Heston. The man's a cunt. You're more of the Charles Bronson type.
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Charles Bronson: [to the prison officer he's ordering to rub vaseline on his naked body] On my arse.
[officer starts rubbing it on]
Charles Bronson: Not in my arse, you fuckin' homo!
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Charles Bronson: You shouldn't mess with boys that are bigger than you.
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Charles Bronson: You don't want to be trapped inside with me sunshine. Inside, I'm somebody nobody wants to fuck with do you understand? I am Charlie Bronson, I am Britain's most violent prisoner.
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Charles Bronson: Now hang on to your fillings. Alright? 'Cause it's going to get fucking Leary.
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Charles Bronson: [Desperately trying to escape from an insane asylum, Bronson meets a patient named John White who reveals that he is a child rapist. Disgusted by pedophiles and wanting to go back to prison, he unsuccessfully tries to kill White by strangulation before carried off by guards]
[Scene change, Bronson walks onto a theater stage set in his sub-conscious mind]
Charles Bronson: I would now like to reenact what I call, "When Murder Goes Wrong".
[Bronson as himself, right side facing audience]
Charles Bronson: When do I go back?
Charles Bronson (as nurse): [Bronson whips around, revealing stage make-up of a female nurse's face on his left side]
[effeminate voice and body language]
Charles Bronson (as nurse): Now now, Mr. Peterson, we aren't going to start up all that silliness again, are we?
Charles Bronson: [whips back around to Bronson, now aggravated] Listen, Nursey, I just wanna know when my trial is and when I head back to the slammer... 'right?
Charles Bronson (as nurse): [Nurse points at Bronson in a scolding manner] WRONG, Mr. Peterson! Now let's not play sillybuggers, eh? I'll just have to pop you in the botty with one of my special potions, mmm?
Charles Bronson: [Bronson pauses, breathes heavily] When's my trial?
Charles Bronson (as nurse): [Nurse wags finger in a condescending manner] Ah-ah-ah-tsk-tsk-tsk-tsk-tsk, no. Mr. White recovered, dear. There's no trial!
[claps gleefully]
Charles Bronson (as nurse): Isn't that wonderful? However, you are being moved.
Charles Bronson: [Bronson calms down] ... Where?
Charles Bronson (as nurse): [giggles, nods, and claps ecstatically] YES, Mr. Peterson! Broadmore Asylum for the criminally insane!
Charles Bronson: [Bronson becomes frustrated again] I deserve to go back to prison for what I did. I want my hotel room back!
Charles Bronson (as nurse): [Nurse] Well, I'm sure you'll find yourself some solitary...
[Bronson turns back to audience and bows; end of scene]
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Charles Bronson: To a terrified woman in a jewellery shop: "Don't fucking move! Or I'll kill you. Alright?"
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[last lines]
Charles Bronson: Right! That's enough! He's had enough, come on, get him out of here! Go on and get him the fuck out of here, he's had enough! Come on! You fucking cunts! No class next week. Right!
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Charles Bronson: [opening hostage negotiations] Right! I've got a librarian up here, and he's in a lot of trouble!
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Charles Bronson: I love you.
Alison: What?
Charles Bronson: [repeats himself] I love you.
Alison: It's been nice. But I love Brian.
Charles Bronson: [taken aback] Who's Brian?
Alison: He's my boyfriend. And he's got a motorbike.
Charles Bronson: Brian...
[clenches his fists]
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Charles Bronson: [Lying down on cell bed, waiting]
Andy Love: [Walks through cell door with a pile of books in hand] Alright Charlie? Fancy something to read?
[Starts arranging books on table for Charlie]
Andy Love: What you after? Got another Jilly Cooper. How you getting on with Marjorie Winslet? Heard it was going well!
Charles Bronson: [Gets up, shuts and locks cell door, turns and points at Andy] Shut your fucking mouth!
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Charles Bronson: [On phone to prison governor] I am sat 'ere with... ah... what's your name?
Andy Love: Uhh... Love
Charles Bronson: [laughs] Love?
Andy Love: A-A-Andy Love
Charles Bronson: [Still smiling] Oh 'Andy' Love, eh?
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Charles Bronson: [On phone to prison governor] I'm sat 'ere, with Andy Love, and I'm gonna snap his fucking neck and stick his head up his arse if I don't get what I want!
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Andy Love: [Trapped with Charlie in cell, watching Charlie undress] What're you doing?
Charles Bronson: What am I doing?
[Cracks belt]
Charles Bronson: What does it fucking look like I'm doing, you cunt?
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Prison Governor: [On phone to Charlie] Hello Charlie. Can you hear me?
Charles Bronson: 'Course I can fucking hear you, there's nothing wrong with MY hearing you cunt!
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Charles Bronson: [Serving tea to a guard]
Paul: [Strolls through door, singing] Picture you upon my knee, Tea for two and two for tea, Just me for you and you for me
[takes drag from cigarette]
Charles Bronson: [Confused and points at Paul] Would you like a cuppa tea too mate?
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Paul: Impressive set of guns you've got there darling, you must be handy in a brawl? Bam bam, knockout, ding ding!
Charles Bronson: [Clenches fists and enters boxing stance]
Paul: [Sips tea] Ahh, very nice!
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[opening monologue]
Charles Bronson: My name is Charles Bronson. All my life I wanted to be famous. I knew I was made for better things. I had a calling. I just didn't know what it is. Wasn't singing. I can't fucking act. Kinda running out of choices really, aren't we?
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Charles Bronson: 1974... tough time to be young in England. Not a lot of opportunity around. Still, life moves on. Irene and I got hitched. It was all right. We didn't have it bad for a couple from the chippy. But they don't give you a star on the walk of fame for "not bad," do they?
Bronson Quotes
Extended Reading
