Borat: Thirteen year ago I release movie film which brought great shame to Kazakhstan. But now I was instruct to return to Yankee Land to carry out secret mission.
Tutar Sagdiyev: My daddy is the smartest person in the whole flat world!
[Borat runs after being spotted]

Borat: People make recognize my face. I would need disguises.
Borat: [buys fat suit] I take this, to be fat like American man!
Borat: Michael Penis, I brought girl for you!
Borat: Only men and bears are allowed inside car.

[His daughter is riding on the roof]
Borat: I go to America!

[gets boos]
Borat: My daughter is gift to someone close to the throne.
Tutar Sagdiyev: I found a new book which only tells the truth. It's called Facebook. I learn so many facts there. Like, our nation's proudest moment, the Holocaust, never happened!
Borat: [to Tutar] Who told you my middle name!
Borat: [walking into a synagogue] I am very depress

Judith Dim Evans: Can i give you a hug?

Borat: [flinches] Don't kill me!
Rudy Giuliani: I'll eat a bat with you.
Borat: [Interrupting CPAC] Mike, you're fired!
Borat: [Being escorted out of CPAC] If you release me, I'll give you my klan robes!
PMS Center Employee: [Reading Borat return fax from Kazakhstan] Return immediately to die in excruciating pain. You will be tied to two cows who will face Uzbeks with turnips inserted in their assholes. Uzbeks will be enticed away with money and cows will follow to eat turnips, ripping you apart.
Tutar Sagdiyev: Do you drive a car?

Hillsborough Republican Club Member #1: Yes!

Hillsborough Republican Club Member #2: Oh Absolutely, more than one!

Hillsborough Republican Club Member #1: Well, not at the same time.

Tutar Sagdiyev: What?

Hillsborough Republican Club Member #3: We drive a car. We own cars.
Rudy Giuliani: You can give me your phone number and your address

[Rests hand around Tutars' hip]
Judith Dim Evans: I feel obligated to be a good person and to bring good to the world. We owe the dead.

[In memoriam, Post-credits]
Borat: I've got great news! Pence is speaking nearby... we'll gift you today!

Tutar Sagdiyev: [Washing Clothes in Brackish River] But I am not ready yet.

Borat: Of course you're ready! You are ready for the golden cage!

Tutar Sagdiyev: Okay, daddy!
Rudy Giuliani: [Grunting]
Borat: This is the worst story that ever happened to any human being... or Jew.
Borat: [entering the CPAC, dressed in a KKK-robe] I'm Stephen Miller. Sorry I'm late.
Borat: [voice-over] Finally the time had come to deliver my daughter to the vice pussy-grabber.
[first lines]

Borat: Jak sie masz? My name-a Borat. My life is nice, NOT! But how I end up like this?

[working in a gulag]
Borat: I will need my producer, Azamat Bagatov.

Premier Nazarbayevdx: Impossible.

Borat: Why?

Premier Nazarbayevdx: You are sitting on him.

[Borat finds his sofa covered in human skin]
Borat: I was publicly humiliate.
Borat: The vice premier was known to be such a pussy hound that he could not be left alone in a room with a woman.
Dr. Yamak (Gypsy Tears): [injects Borat] These gypsy tears will keep you safe.
[Borat finds his daughter Tutar in the box reserved for Johnny the Monkey]

Borat: You ate him?

Tutar Sagdiyev: No, he ate himself?
Tutar Sagdiyev: Do you love me as much as your sons?

Borat: No, more.
Borat: Alexa, order three flashlights
Borat: [At a beauty salon with his daughter] I want you to make a hotsie out of this notsie.

Melinda: We can do it

Borat: [Pointing to his daughter] You want to see the hair?

Melinda: I would like to see her hair, yes.

Tutar Sagdiyev: [Lifting up her skirt] Okay.

Melinda: No, ma'am. Not that hair.
Tutar Sagdiyev: Look there, it's a woman drive a car.

Borat: That is not a woman, that is Dog the bounty hunter.
Borat: Since I did not have money to buy a gun I went to the nearest synagogue to wait for the next mass shooting.
Borat: [Back in his village] Jak sie masz! Kazakhstan now feminist nation, like US&A and Saudi Arabia.

Borat: Bride exports declared misogynist, so we now traffic grooms.
Borat: We use my iPhone 4's hotspot and steal password from assholes Uzbekistan.
Borat: Best of all, I am reinstate as number four journalist in all of Kazakhstan. Who number three?

Tutar Sagdiyev: [Comes from the leftside] Tutar Sagdiyev.

Borat: Why not? May the patriarchy go to hell!

Tutar Sagdiyev: Nice.

Borat: No, niiiice.

Tutar Sagdiyev: Don't mansplain to me.

Borat: [shrugs] Feminist.
[Borat meets his teenage daughter for the first time - in a stable]

Borat: I have a non-male son?

Tutar Sagdiyev: Daddy?

Borat: Why are you living like this?

Tutar Sagdiyev: Because I have no husband to put me in a beautiful wife cage. Unlike that bitch, Lilyat Sakanov!

Borat: Mm. How old are you?

Tutar Sagdiyev: Fifteen.

Borat: FIFTEEN? You're the oldest unmarried woman in all of Kazakhstan.

Tutar Sagdiyev: I'm so happy that you're back.

Borat: I'm not. I'm off to US & A.

Tutar Sagdiyev: Please take me with you!

Borat: Not possible.

Tutar Sagdiyev: Please, Daddy!

Borat: [hands her a piece of onion] Here, have a piece of onion instead.
[Borat and Tutar are driving to a local hairdresser]

Tutar Sagdiyev: Can you come with me to the hairdresser?

Borat: No, what if they recognize me?

Tutar Sagdiyev: Just disguise yourself as an American.

[They arrive at the hairdresser and Borat has disguised himself in denim jean and pants with a cowboy hat on]

Melinda: I'm Melinda.

Borat: [failing to hide accent] My name John Chevrolet.

Melinda: Nice to meet you.

Borat: I want you to make a hotsie out of this notsie.
[Tutar is about to get her hair changed]

Borat: I have a, um, idea of a hair.

Melinda: Okay.

[Borat pulls out a clipped-out picture of Dog the Bounty Hunter]

Borat: This one. Nice one.

Melinda: This is actually a gentleman.

Borat: This is a man?

Melinda: Yes, sir.
[Borat and Tutar have arrived at a dress shop during Tutar's makeover]

Borat: I need dress with real sexy peels.

Michelle: Okay.

Borat: Where is the "no means yes" section?

[Michelle begins laughing as does Borat a moment later]
[after eating a cupcake too fast, Tutar has swallowed the tiny plastic baby and Borat takes her to a doctor - in this case, an anti-abortion crisis pregnancy center]

Tutar Sagdiyev: I have a baby inside me and I want to take it out of me.
Borat: [Borat brings daughter to pregnancy center after she swallows toy baby cupcake toping] She want it out now please, can you take it out?

Pastor Jonathan Bright: No we can not, that life will die

Borat: It already dead, it not living

Pastor Jonathan Bright: no it is living, right now

Borat: No it's this big

[Borat using fingers to show size of toy]

Pastor Jonathan Bright: It has a heartbeat, right now...

Borat: n... I don't think so...
Tutar Sagdiyev: [abortion scene con't. Borat brings his daughter to pregnancy clinic after she swallows cupcake toping baby toy] And it will hurt my A-hole

Pastor Jonathan Bright: mmhmm mhhmm

Borat: if it come out, yes, because, the arm, like this

[makes a gesture with his hands spread out]