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[from trailer]
Little Charles Aiken: I can't believe I missed Uncle Bev's funeral.
Charlie Aiken: That can't compare to what you have in your heart.
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Violet Weston: I told you nobody slips anything by me.
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Charlie Aiken: Oh... oh... I got a big bite of fear! And it never tasted so good!
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[repeated line]
Barbara Weston: Eat your fish.
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Ivy Weston: Mom, Charles and I...
Barbara Weston: Little Charles.
Ivy Weston: Barbara.
Barbara Weston: You got to say Little Charles or she's not gonna know who you're talking about.
Ivy Weston: Little Charles and I... Little Charles and I...
Violet Weston: Little Charles and you are brother and sister. I know that.
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Charlie Aiken: Mattie Fae, we're gonna get in the car and go home. And if you say one more mean thing to that boy I'm gonna kick your fat Irish ass into the highway.
Mattie Fae Aiken: What the hell did you just say to me?
Charlie Aiken: Kids, go outside, would you please? I don't understand this meanness. I look at you and your sister and the way you talk to people and I don't understand it. I can't understand why folks can't be respectful to one another. I don't think there's any excuse for it. My family didn't treat each other that way.
Mattie Fae Aiken: Oh, maybe cause your family didn't have...
Charlie Aiken: You better not say anything about my family right now, I mean it! We just buried a man I loved very much. And whatever faults he may have had, he was a good, kind, decent man. And to hear you tearing your own son not even a day later dishonors Beverly's memory. We've been married 38 years and I wouldn't trade it for anything. But if you can't find a generous place in your heart for your own son, we're not gonna make it to 39!
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Violet Weston: Truth is you just can't compete with a younger woman. It's just one of those unfair things in life. Is there a younger woman involved?
Barbara Weston: Isn't enough on this topic?
Bill Fordham: Yes, there is a younger woman.
Violet Weston: Well, see? Odds are against you there, babe.
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Violet Weston: I thought we were having a funeral dinner not a cockfight.
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Violet Weston: I'm a drug addict. I love drug.
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Jean Fordham: [to Barbara] Mom, you're such a liar. No, stop, you are.
Violet Weston: You know if I ever call my mom a liar she would knock my goddamn head off my shoulders.
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Violet Weston: You can't do this! This is my house! This is my house!
Barbara Weston: You don't get it, do you? You don't get it! I AM running things now!
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Barbara Weston: It's the pills talking.
Violet Weston: Pills can't talk!
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Violet Weston: Karen! Shame on you! Don't you know you're not supposed to say "Cowboys and Indians"? You played "Cowboys and Native Americans". Right, Barb?
Barbara Weston: What are you taking? What pills?
Violet Weston: Oh, leave me alone.
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Jean Fordham: [Barbara slapped her daughter] I hate you!
Bill Fordham: [to Barbara] What's the matter with you?
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Barbara Weston: Are we breaking shit now, huh? I can break shit! Hey! See, everybody can break some shit!
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Violet Weston: Isn't there the TV commercial where the lady says: "Where is the meat?"
Mattie Fae Aiken: Where is the meat?
Karen Weston: Where is the beef?
Violet Weston: [annoyed] Where's the meat? Where's the meat? Where's the meat? Meat, meat, where is the meat?
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Barbara Weston: Marriage is hard.
Karen Weston: That's one thing about mom and dad. You gotta tip your hat to anybody who can stay married that long.
Ivy Weston: Karen, he killed himself.
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Barbara Weston: Thank God we can't tell the future, we'd never get out of bed.
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Karen Weston: It's not cut and dried, it lives where everything lives: somewhere in the middle.
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Violet Weston: I'm not hungry!
Barbara Weston: Eat the fish, bitch!
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Beverly Weston: My wife takes pills, and I drink. That's the little deal we've struck - a little paragraph in our marriage contract.
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Violet Weston: The only woman pretty enough not to wear makeup was Elizabeth Taylor, and she wore a ton.
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Ivy Weston: Are you supposed to be smoking?
Violet Weston: Is anybody supposed to smoke?
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Violet Weston: I'm so glad one of my girls stayed close to home. In my day, family stuck together.
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Barbara Weston: It's not my fault. Mom told you, not me.
Ivy Weston: There's no difference.
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[first lines]
Beverly Weston: Life is very long. T.S. Elliot. Not the first person to say it, certainly not the first person to think it, but he's given credit for it because he bothered to write it down.
[chuckles]
Beverly Weston: Now if you say it, you have to say his name after it. "Life is very long." T.S. Elliot. Absolutely goddamn right.
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Barbara Weston: Listen to me! Die after me, alright. I don't care what else you do, where you go, how you screw up your life, just
[pause]
Barbara Weston: survive.
[pause]
Barbara Weston: Please!
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Violet Weston: Why don't you go fuck a fuckin' sow's ass?
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Little Charles Aiken: [getting up] I have a truth to tell.
Violet Weston: It speaks!
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Violet Weston: [to Barbara, holding the pills] You see these babies? These are my best fuckin' friends and they never let me down. You try to take them away from me, I'll eat ya alive!
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Barbara Weston: I want you to know you're not alone, if you need any help.
Violet Weston: No... I dont need help...
Barbara Weston: I-I wanna help...
Violet Weston: I dont need your help.
Barbara Weston: Mom...
Violet Weston: I dont need your help. I have got myself... I know how this goes. Once all the talking is threw, people just go back to their own nonsenses. I know that so, dont worry about me. I will manage.
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Violet Weston: That man! What I first fell in love with was his mystery. I thought it was sexy as hell! You knew he was the smartest one in the room, then he'd just say something and knock you out. He'd just stand there with a little smile on his face and not say a word. Sexy!
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Violet Weston: Every woman needs makeup. Don't let anyone tell you any different.
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Mattie Fae Aiken: And look at your boobs. Last time I saw you, you looked like a little boy.
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Violet Weston: I have an Indian in my house!
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Little Charles Aiken: [singing to Ivy] Well, I've never been a man of many words / And there's nothing I could say that you haven't heard / But I'll sing you love songs 'till the day I die / The way I'm feeling / I can't keep it inside // I'll sing a sweet serenade whenever you're feeling sad / And a lullaby each night before you go to bed / I'll sing to you for the rest of your life / The way I'm feeling / I can't keep it inside
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Barbara Weston: Holy shit that's Karen! You remember your Aunt Karen?
Jean Fordham: Kind of.
Barbara Weston: And that must be this year's man!
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Bill Fordham: You're so goddam self-righteous, you know that?
Barbara Weston: Surely you must have realized when you started porking Pippi Longstocking that you were due for some self-righteousness, just a smudge of indignation on my part!
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Bill Fordham: You're thoughtful, Barbara, but you're not open. You're passionate, but you're hard. You're a good, decent, funny, wonderful woman, and I love you, but - YOU'RE A PAIN IN THE ASS!
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Violet Weston: I ever tell you the story of Raymond Qualls? Not much story to it. Boy I had a crush on when I was thirteen or so. Rough-looking boy, beat-up Levis, messy hair. Terrible underbite. But he had these beautiful cowboy boots, shiny chocolate leather. He was so proud of those boots, you could tell, way he'd strut around, all arms and elbows, puffed up and cocksure. I decided I needed to get a girly pair of those same boots and I convinced myself he'd ask me to go steady. He'd see me in those boots and say "Now there's the gal for me." Found the boots in a window downtown and just went crazy: praying for those boots, rehearsing the conversation I'd have with Raymond when he saw me in my boots. Must've asked my momma a hundred times if I could get those boots. "What do you want for Christmas, Vi?" "Momma, I'll give all of it up just for those boots." Bargaining, you know? She started dropping hints about a package under the tree she had wrapped up, about the size of a boot box, nice wrapping paper. "Now, Vi, don't you cheat and look in there before Christmas morning." Little smile on her face. Christmas morning, I was up like a shot, boy, under the tree, tearing open that box. There was a pair of boots, all right... men's work boots, holes in the toes, chewed up laces, caked in mud and dog shit. Lord, my momma laughed for days.
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Barbara Weston: What were these people thinking, the jokers who settled this place? Who was the asshole that looked at all that flat, hot nothing, and then planted his flag? I mean, we fucked the Indians for this?
Bill Fordham: Well, genocide always seems like such a good idea at the time.
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Bill Fordham: I have not forsook my responsibilities!
Barbara Weston: It's "forsaken," big shot.
Bill Fordham: No, actually, "forsook" is also an acceptable usage.
Barbara Weston: Oh, "forsook" you and the horse you rode in on.
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[last lines]
Violet Weston: And then you're gone.
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Bill Fordham: Our burden as parents. - I got that part.
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Barbara Weston: And you really haven't been much of a parent lately.
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Bill Fordham: So, it's tough to... Just because you and I are struggling with this Gordian knot, it doesn't mean
[interrupted]
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Barbara Weston: But her fourteen-year-old self might view it differently.
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Johnna Monevata: What kind of cancer?
Beverly Weston: Oh my God, I nearly neglected the punch line. Mouth cancer.
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Ivy Weston: I can't perpetuate these myths of family or sisterhood anymore. We're just people, some of us accidentally connected by genetics, a random selection of cells.
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Ivy Weston: Little Charles and I...
Violet Weston: Little Charles and you are brother and sister. I know that.
Violet Weston: [dumbfounded] What? No! Listen. Little Charles and I...
Violet Weston: I've always known that. I told you, no one slips anything by me.
Ivy Weston: Mom!
Barbara Weston: Don't listen.
Violet Weston: I knew the whole time Bev and Mattie Fae were carrying on. Charlie should've known too, if he hadn't been smoking all that grass.
Barbara Weston: It's the pills talking.
Violet Weston: Pills can't talk! Your father tore himself up about it thirty-some-odd years. But Beverly wouldn't be Beverly if he hadn't had something to brood about!
Ivy Weston: Mom, what are you talking about?
Violet Weston: Better you girls know now. Now, you're older, you never know when somebody might need a kidney.
Ivy Weston: Why in God's name did you tell me this?
Violet Weston: Hey, why do you care?
Ivy Weston: [to both] You're monsters.
Violet Weston: Oh, come on, now.
Ivy Weston: Monsters!
[leaves]
Violet Weston: [calling after Ivy] Who's the injured party here?
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Mattie Fae Aiken: [Little Charles is playing a song to Ivy in the living room; the TV is on... Mattie Fae suddenly enters] Liberace! Better get yourself together. We have to get home and take care of those damn dogs... they've probably eaten the drapes by now.
Charlie Aiken: [entering] I'm sure the house is fine.
Mattie Fae Aiken: [to Charlie] Oh look, honey! Little Charles has got the TV on.
[to Ivy as Little Charles starts stammering]
Mattie Fae Aiken: This one watches so much television it's rotted his brain.
Ivy Weston: I'm sure that's not true.
Mattie Fae Aiken: [to Little Charles] What was it I caught you watching the other day?
Charlie Aiken: Mattie Fae...
Little Charles Aiken: [stammering] I... I don't remember.
Mattie Fae Aiken: You do so remember! Some dumb talk show about people swapping wives.
Little Charles Aiken: I don't remember.
Mattie Fae Aiken: You don't remember. Too bad there's not a job where they pay you to sit around watching TV.
Charlie Aiken: Come on, Mattie Fae.
Mattie Fae Aiken: [laughing to Ivy about Little Charles] You know he got fired from a SHOE STORE?
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Violet Weston: Barbara please...!
August: Osage County Quotes
Extended Reading
