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Jackie: I know gay men. I practically invented them.
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Jackie: I'm calling from a pay phone because I can't get my piece of sh*t cell phone to work unless I stand on my head with my fingers up my ass!
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[during a game of Pyramid with Jackie and Bret]
Eli Wyckoff: The ex-football player who allegedly killed his wife.
Tom: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! Allegedly? What are you, nuts?
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Jackie: Oh my god, Eli was stalking you? That is so romantic.
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[last lines]
Tom: And the thing about Rhett Butler...
Eli Wyckoff: Yeah?
Tom: He wasn't very fuzzy. Was he?
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[discussing the bad dates Brett's set Eli up on]
Brett Miles Sanford: Look I know it didn't go all so, you know, that well last time with... Richard, was it?
Eli Wyckoff: Rita! From UPS. She was a woman!
Brett Miles Sanford: Whatever, she was still gay. That's your problem, you're so picky.
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[discussing Eli's bad date with Tom the previous night]
Eli Wyckoff: He kept saying, "You do the math," even when it made no sense sense. What a turn-off.
Brett Miles Sanford: What's the turn-on? According to your mother you haven't had a hard-on since she first took you to see THE NUTCRACKER at the Jewish Community Center in first grade.
Eli Wyckoff: Stop talking to my mother about my sex life.
Brett Miles Sanford: What sex life?
Eli Wyckoff: I have one!
Brett Miles Sanford: Uh huh, right.
[makes jerking off motions]
Eli Wyckoff: Ok, y'know, it counts. I spent 10 years learning which buttons to push, now I just have to look at myself and I cum.
Brett Miles Sanford: Eww.
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[Eli's mother has just left an embarrassing message on his machine that Tom overheard]
Eli Wyckoff: Oh my God, I'm gonna go to the bathroom now and hope to God that I can overdose on Tums, or Maalox, or pine-scented Glade.
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Tom: Jackie would love this bear... Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy, was he? Was he? Was he? Was he? Was he?
Eli Wyckoff: [interrupting him] Was he, was he, WAS he!
Tom: That's what I said
Eli Wyckoff: No, no. You said "Was heeeee?" It's "WAS he"
Tom: What's the difference?
Eli Wyckoff: You're kidding, right? You just established that Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair; why would you then ask "Was heeee?" like a question, like you didn't know if he was fuzzy or not?
Tom: It *is* a question, I'm asking if Fuzzy is or isn't fuzzy, what is so wrong about that?
Eli Wyckoff: It is a rhetorical question, it's supposed to be ironic! "Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy... *was* he?"
-
Tom: Where you going?
Jackie: Uhh, home, to officially 'not call'.
Tom: No, no, no, no, you were supposed to stay here and watch Lifetime Television for Women and Gay Men!
Jackie: Uhh, no.
Tom: It's Joan Van Ark in "Not Without My Nose Job".
Jackie: Oh, angel, I've already lived that movie!
All Over the Guy Quotes
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Wilfred 2022-03-02 08:01:08
For me who read very few films and as a gay, the film is ok, but still boring, if I was born ten years earlier and watched this film earlier, maybe I would have given four stars, the common Hollywood comedy mode, It just so happens that comrades are the protagonists.
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Ian 2022-04-22 07:01:53
Tom is really KE, he has no resistance to this look and face. The plot is alright, the noise is split and combined, and the impact of the two's values is quite like a relationship between the two.
