Zach Selwyn

Steven Hyde: Pimp gave you the holiday off, huh?

Laurie Forman: Yeah, he replaced me with your mom.

Steven Hyde: [about Kelso's shirt being in Laurie's room] Say, how'd THAT get there?

Michael Kelso: [trying to cover his affair with Laurie] That's funny. No - This isn't even mine! Yeah, this must be ERIC'S shirt.

Jackie Burkhardt: Your mom sewed your name in it, Michael.

Michael Kelso: Man, Eric's going to be pissed, huh? Yeah, 'cause I borrowed Eric's shirt 'cause mine wasn't working right. And then my mom must've sewed my name in it.

Jackie Burkhardt: Hum, I don't know, Michael...

Michael Kelso: Jackie, if I were lying I'd come up with a lot better lie than that.

Steven Hyde: Yeah, you'd think so.