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Michael Westen: [crossover ad introducing "Royal Pains": Michael is narrating a letter he's written Hank Lawson, who's opening a care package Michael sent him] Dear Dr. Hank, I understand you recently lost your job and had to find a new way to earn a living in an unfamiliar setting. I know exactly what that's like, so I've enclosed a few things that might come in handy: sunscreen, sunglasses, and a block of C-4 because you never know when you'll need a stable plastic explosive. Best of luck. Your pal, Michael Westen.
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Divya Katdare: ["Characters Welcome" crossover ad with "Royal Pains": Divya Katdare is diagnosing Sam in a bar] It could be excessive blood loss or hypoglycemia. Are you on a diuretic?
Sam Axe: No.
Divya Katdare: Perhaps it's even psychogenic polydipsia.
Sam Axe: Oh?
Divya Katdare: Any one of those could be causing your excessive thirst.
Sam Axe: I see.
Waiter: [gives Sam a beer bottle] Here you go, sir.
Sam Axe: Thank you.
[he takes a drink from it]
Sam Axe: Hey! What do you know? It's gone! It's like a miracle cure!
Divya Katdare: Miraculous.
Sam Axe: Doesn't mean it's stopped. Sammy's very sick.
Divya Katdare: Is this how you usually pick up women?
Sam Axe: No, usually I just get 'em drunk. Waiter!
Olga Bespalenko
Extended Reading
