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Inspector Jacques Clouseau: Chief Inspector, I can't thank you enough for giving me the opportunity to solve the Pink Panther murder. Without your decision to put me on the case, who knows, someone else might have won the Medal of Honor this year.
Chief Inspector Dreyfus: Yes, I know.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: I owe it all to you, chief inspector. Without you, I would be nothing.
Chief Inspector Dreyfus: Perhaps you still are.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: Ah! Excellent verbal joust, Inspector.
Chief Inspector Dreyfus: [the corner of Dreyfus's coat gets caught in the car door as Clouseau closes it] You idiot!
Chief Inspector Dreyfus: Oh, no.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: Hit it, Ponton.
[Ponton drives away with Dreyfus being dragged on the road]
Chief Inspector Dreyfus: No! Clouseau! Stop the car. Deer--
[the rest of Dreyfus's conversation goes unheard]
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: What?
Ponton: Nothing.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: You didn't say: "Stop the car. Dear God, I beg of you, stop the car"?
Ponton: No.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: Hmm...
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Inspector Jacques Clouseau: [His leg accidentally touches the bed's wheel lock, and it starts to roll away] You know, Ponton.
Ponton: Yes, Inspector.
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: This is a very hard time for Inspector Dreyfus. It is important that we show compassion. And we must use the gentle healing power of laughter.
[Dreyfus groans as his bed rolls into the hospital corridor and down a staircase. The Pink Panther theme starts playing. Doctors, nurses, and medical staff start panicking and shrieking as Dreyfus's bed continues to roll away]
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: This is going to hurt.
Chief Inspector Dreyfus: [Dreyfus and his bed fly through a window and into the River Seine] Clouseau!
Inspector Jacques Clouseau: Ooh. That breeze feels good.
Kenji Watanabe
Extended Reading
