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Jay Cartwright: Why's there always some cunt with a guitar?
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Will McKenzie: Playing the guitar badly, wearing beads, talking about 'one love' and pretending you are friends with Central American villagers - who, by the way, despise you - before heading back to your parents five-bedroomed house in Surrey, doesn't make you a spiritual person, it makes you a bell-end.
Ben: I think you're right about his song, Katie.
Will McKenzie: Oh, fuck off, Ben! You don't believe in 'song lines' any more than I do. It's just a way for you to seem interesting to girls because deep down you know you're boring and pretentious like your stupid fucking dreadlocks. Which, by the way, always look embarrassing on white people. They're not countercultural, they actually scream 'Oh, I've got a trust fund!' so get a normal haircut, you unbearable prick.
Felicity Ward
Extended Reading
