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Violet Baudelaire: Why do you hate us so much?
Count Olaf: Because it's fun!
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Count Olaf: [produces an hourglass] When the sand runs out, the Baudelaire fortune will be mine!
[the sand runs out]
Count Olaf: ...I bought it online. You need to turn it over a few times.
Daniel Handler
Extended Reading
A Series of Unfortunate Events quotes