Charlotte Henry

Prefect of Police: [interviewing the first witness] So, your name is Victor Albert Adolph Jules Hugo Louis Dupont?

Victor Albert Adolph Jules Hugo Louis Dupont, the Landlord: Yes, sir.

Prefect of Police: Why did you not investigate when you heard the first scream?

Victor Albert Adolph Jules Hugo Louis Dupont, the Landlord: I... I was afraid.

Prefect of Police: Stupid, incredibly stupid.

Franz Odenheimer: [the next person approaches the Prefect, talking German] Habe die Ehre, Herr Prefekt.

[It's my honor, Mr. Prefect.]

Prefect of Police: What is your name and business?

Franz Odenheimer: I am Franz Odenheimer. I own a restaurant.

Prefect of Police: Odenheimer, in your own way, tell us what happened.

Franz Odenheimer: You see, I was just going to bed. Then suddenly, I heard a scream. Right away, I ran across the street. And I was one of the first ones to enter this room. On the way upstairs, I heard a voice. And that voice was speaking Italian.

Prefect of Police: [doubting his accuracy] Do you speak Italian?

Franz Odenheimer: No.

Prefect of Police: Were you ever in Italy?

Franz Odenheimer: No.

Prefect of Police: How do you know it was Italian?

Franz Odenheimer: Because I am sure it was Italian.

Prefect of Police: [unconvinced] Ah. Danke schön.

[Thank you.]

Prefect of Police: [calls on next person] Alberto Montani. What do you know of this affair?

Alberto Montani: Well, I also heard the voice. But it was not Italian. I am Italian. I speak Italian.

Alberto Montani: [says something in Italian, then continues in English] When I ran up the stairs with the others, I heard the voice. It's not Italian, no. Definitely, it was Danish.

Prefect of Police: Do you speak Danish?

Alberto Montani: No.

Prefect of Police: Were you ever in Denmark?

Alberto Montani: No.

Prefect of Police: How do you know it was Danish?

Alberto Montani: My intuition.

The Dane: [to Montani] It was not Danish!

The Dane: [to Prefect] I beg your pardon, Your Honor. I am a native of Denmark. Danish is my native tongue. I heard the voice, but it was not Danish. It was German.

Franz Odenheimer: [upset, approaches the Prefect] Italian, not German.

Alberto Montani: Danish.

The Dane: German.

Franz Odenheimer: [in German] Ich lege meine Hand ans Lügners Feuer das es keiner Deutscher war!

[I put my hand on the Liar's Fire that it wasn't a German!]

The Dane: [while Montani argues in Italian] I say it was German.

Prefect of Police: [while all 3 argue loudly in their native languages] Silence!

Franz Odenheimer: Italian.

Alberto Montani: Danish.

The Dane: German.

Prefect of Police: Silence.