Office Christmas Party movie plot
-
Tracey Hughes: [beginning her pitch for AnyWair] What's the most annoying thing about the Internet?
Jeremy: Pictures of peoples' kids.
Joel: Linked-ln invites.
Nate: My girlfriend's always on it.
[tries to convince everyone]
Nate: I have a girlfriend.
Fred: The lack of Asian male representation in porn.
Jeremy: Grumpy Cat. It's like... It's Garfield.
Fred: Oh, you know? That orange with the human dick?
-
Jeremy: Mary just fucking cited me! Okay? I thought this was a party. If I want to dick tap Alan, I'm gonna dick tap Alan. That's a timeless gag! Never not funny!
Josh Parker: [tries to shoo him away] Okay, off you go.
Jeremy: She is like a poisonous fucking cloud of shit gas, like, just seeping into everybody's good time. Every word she says makes my fucking hemorrhoids throb! I want that on the record!
Josh Parker: It is.
[Jeremy leaves]
Walter Davis: He's in customer service?
Josh Parker: Yeah. He's much better on the phone.